chrissreef Posted March 20, 2009 Posted March 20, 2009 It's bound to happen... what do I do if I'm out alone (trying to make new friends) and see my ex, guy she left me for and their pose. What's the best thing to do? for me, we're on "good" terms but she's a little standoffish because she's "with someone else and there is no more us" (even though she's said we could end up together, she just needs space to get to know herself - new guy is a party/bar/jock lol)
hopethisworks Posted March 20, 2009 Posted March 20, 2009 The most important thing is to keep a smile on your face. Act like it doesnt bother you. (even if it does) Theres no reason to jepoardize your happiness at the expense of hers.
Author chrissreef Posted March 20, 2009 Author Posted March 20, 2009 do i wave first? do i leave? what if i'm with a date or a group?
janjan Posted March 20, 2009 Posted March 20, 2009 to me the best thing would just be to wave at her, say "hi so-and-so" then go your way, as if she was just a casual acquaintance. this may be hard to force, i myself would like to to this but i'm not sure if at this point i'd be able to. you might consider avoiding chances of meeting her until doing this comes naturally. i know some of you may disagree and say that is letting someone control you, but when you liked someone you did in fact give them some control and you are still pulling out of that. this may be better than seeing them too soon and losing your composure, and you feel like even more crap.
socialight Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 hopethisworks is partially correct. First, make no effort to acknowledge them. If they approach or contact you, be happy and confident. Smiles, shake hands, etc. But dont show any interest in them as people or a couple. Just be dignified and show that you are not concerned with their welfare, that you are happy and focused on your own life. Call it polite indifference. That is the way to handle it.
Author chrissreef Posted March 21, 2009 Author Posted March 21, 2009 ok, so don't leave/run off and don't just walk up "heeey, long time no see!"?
hopesndreams Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 (even though she's said we could end up together, she just needs space to get to know herself - new guy is a party/bar/jock lol) She's stringing you along making you think you are in with a chance. She is enjoying the fact you are pining after her. You are her ego feed. Drop her like a hot potato. If you really think what she says is the truth she will come crawling back on all fours if you do NC, but don't hold your breath, she's playing you.
Lizzie60 Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 ok, so don't leave/run off and don't just walk up "heeey, long time no see!"? Nope.. just throw a tantrum.. Come on.. how old are you? Geeezz... you're out and bump into your ex.. the only thing to do is smile and say Hi.. how are you doing? and move on... simple as that..
Island Girl Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 hopethisworks is partially correct. First, make no effort to acknowledge them. If they approach or contact you, be happy and confident. Smiles, shake hands, etc. But dont show any interest in them as people or a couple. Just be dignified and show that you are not concerned with their welfare, that you are happy and focused on your own life. Call it polite indifference. That is the way to handle it. This is it exactly and if there is eye contact across the room do not wave -- that is too much effort - a head nod is enough of an acknowledgment. Then just do your best to maintain what you would do normally --- talk with other people and remember they are not part of your world -- treat them like you have met them somewhere before but they aren't even at the level of acquaintance.
You'reasian Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 It's bound to happen... what do I do if I'm out alone (trying to make new friends) and see my ex, guy she left me for and their pose. What's the best thing to do? for me, we're on "good" terms but she's a little standoffish because she's "with someone else and there is no more us" (even though she's said we could end up together, she just needs space to get to know herself - new guy is a party/bar/jock lol) If you've gotten over her, you won't really be bothered - you may even be happy for her.
trying123 Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 Dude its gonna mess you up, try to avoid the same bars, You will be really uncomfortable, all I can say is be happy and smile, and then leave, no one is strong enough be ok if you see them together and stop letting her string you along, we could be together in the end screw that
mark982 Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 believe me it's making her as nervous as you are.be nice and polite,say hi,the usual short replies. but don't go running away,they'll know the have the power then.
EmperorR Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 thankfully my ex lives 2 hours away, although across from my sister. If I saw her and the guy shes with, I'd just laugh
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