Hersheys Posted March 19, 2009 Posted March 19, 2009 Now I know what it feels like to be NCed.... I was seeing this guy for 5.5 months. While out having dinner, we had a major misunderstanding over inconsequential matters which erupted into an argument. The next day I thought that we'd be in a much better position to talk and try to make things normal again. I was hoping that he'd come over to patch things up or make a lame a** phone call for us to come to an agreement to make peace and forget about the misunderstanding. Well...... he never did. He just went pfft. I tried to call him once. Didn't answer. Sent him a text message asking him how he was. No answer. I read LS of course so I know so much about NC. When he refused to answer my phone call and text, I got that this guy is on NC mode. Fine, NC it is....so I stopped contacting him. Soooo he's disappeared on me. It's been almost 4 weeks now and I have to admit it's tough. Now I know what my ex ex (the one that led me to LS) must have felt when I initiated NC on him. I never thought it would be this hard. I keep thinking about him. It's been so long since we last talked but why am I still hoping and wishing that he'd come around and talk to me. I guess it's clear that it's over between us but wow no word on ending it I believe it's mutual NC we have here and being such, does it mean like we will never talk to each other? Just like that? What I can i do to stop hoping and pining for any contact from him? Has anybody ever dealt with anything similar to my situation (your ex has gone NC on you too) and if so what did you do to make the annoying and depressing 'hope for contact' to go away? Help please....Thanks in advance for your input and thoughts.
sugarmomma Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 There is a huge difference between no contact and abandoning your mate of almost 6 months over a silly argument. My God! I would not answer if he did contact me after something like that. If a person decides on NC at least they should inform their mate. Some people just get a kick out of abandoning others because of their own unaddressed issues. I would forget about him and change my numbers email etc. He is a total loser!!! Be strong and keep your head up!!!
D-Lish Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 That's fishy business..... To have an argument and then be ignored in such a way! It sounds as if there was already something brewing- like he was looking for a way out. Regardless, it's crappy behaviour. Do your best to leave him behind. After 6 months he owed you something better than this.
Author Hersheys Posted March 21, 2009 Author Posted March 21, 2009 Thanks for the response, sugarmomma and D-Lish!!!!! I've been thinking the same, it's 4+ weeks now and any contact he makes from this point on deserves to be ignored. What else for, right? I would love to hear anything from him, an explanation of why he just up and left, how he's been but really any contact from him would now seem pathetic and lame. I keep going back to the night we had the argument, what I did and said wrong, what I should have done, if only I skipped on seeing him that night things would have been different, can't help but blame myself BUT now I'm convinced that he was just waiting for something to go wrong to give him a reason to leave. I never did and will not contact him. It sucks to be left hanging. It sucks even more to be kept waiting and hoping on something that might never happen. Wth is wrong with me...aaahhhh!
D-Lish Posted March 21, 2009 Posted March 21, 2009 Nothing is wrong with you, there is something wrong with him. I am betting he was gearing up to break up and looking for an excuse. That's a dickish move to just stop talking to someone after almost 6 months. You can't get into someone else's head- no matter how hard you try. And people here can give you opinions, etc.... But no one knows but him why he pulled a douche-bag move like that. Of course it hurts, of course it's disruptive and makes us second guess ourselves. You can't wallow in that though. It's his issue, not yours. I'm sorry though. After 6 months I'd want some answers.
Author Hersheys Posted March 21, 2009 Author Posted March 21, 2009 Nothing is wrong with you, there is something wrong with him. I am betting he was gearing up to break up and looking for an excuse. That's a dickish move to just stop talking to someone after almost 6 months. You can't get into someone else's head- no matter how hard you try. And people here can give you opinions, etc.... But no one knows but him why he pulled a douche-bag move like that. Of course it hurts, of course it's disruptive and makes us second guess ourselves. You can't wallow in that though. It's his issue, not yours. I'm sorry though. After 6 months I'd want some answers. I agree! I want an explanation and a clean break. I just want him to say something....anything just to quiet down these thoughts and questions. What is it he's so afraid of? It's not like I'm going to force him to be with me or I'm gonna hunt him down *gag* lol. I now believe that there really are some who would rather bail and avoid a conflict than to deal with things the way any decent, normal person would do. I've been tempted many times to contact him (again) but with the way things are, I doubt he'd respond. His silence speaks 'I don't want to be with you anymore' loud and clear. It's crazy and it's wrong but I gotta admit that I'm at that point right now where I'm thinking that I would never meet someone as good as him. Don't you just hate it when you think about the days, weeks leading up to that moment when things went wrong. There's always that unexplainable feeling that something's off.
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