DivineSpark Posted March 16, 2009 Posted March 16, 2009 My ex and I were together for 4 years. We have a daughter that I keep more only because she works nights. We broke up last year in July because I cheated on her. I admitted to it and did the best I could to make it work. We were not intimate for months at a time. When I tried talking to her about it she would say she didnt know what was wrong and didn't seem into the relationship. Because of that I was looking for attention and found it elswhere .... WRONG on my part. For a while she kept me on the string saying it wasn't over she needed time and continued to party and not care about anything. Eventually she found someone and said there was no hope for us and that it was over. She did not want me to hang out with our friends only this guy, she would make sure that I would watchour daughter when she partied so that way I had no chance of being with our friends. She wanted me to be at home alone while she had her new BF with all of our friends. Then I found out that the reason why she was not intimate with me towards the end of our relationship was because she was seeing someone else too. For a few months after we broke up she was playing a very big victim card and telling everyone it was all my fault. The new guy she is with they were together for about 3 months and apparently one night they were sitting in our old apartment and he asked her why she was not fully into the relationship and she said I dont know. Three weeks later he moves in, and two weeks after that he buys her a "promise" ring that she wears on her ring finger. I know he does not like me at all, more than likely from what she told him only from her side of the story. But something does not seem right. I know her and her best friend and I both agreed that she hasnt seemed happy since she was with me almost a year ago now. Also I asked her when the date was for the "big day" and she became really defensive and said its not what you think it is. She still seems to play the its all your fault card and avoids all conversation about us. It seems that she or he, dont know which, is forcing the relationship as much as possible. The last creepy thing about it all, her new BF looks A LOT like me. When I make plans to have fun with our friends she gets MAD when I dont watch our daughter so she can go have fun with him. There are just way too many signs that shows she still loves me and wants us but it seems she has gotten herself too deep into where she is at that maybe she doesnt know what to do, she doesnt want to go back on all the web that she has been spinning because then she would have to admit she is wrong. I can tell she wants our family still but gets mad and acts like this. I don't get it. She uses our daughter to hurt me sometimes, keeps her from me and such. I don't get what she is feeling and why. Yes I still love her and would love our family back, and call me crazy but I know her and can tell she does too. It just seems she doesnt want to be wrong and if she were to come back to me then she would seem wrong about everything she told everyone else. Am I wrong in this? its been almost a year now since we have broken up and she doesnt seem like she has moved on.
suzanne2009 Posted March 17, 2009 Posted March 17, 2009 You need to let it go and move on. I know that is now what you want to hear, but it is the truth. The real issue here should not be about her, but about you. I seems to me that you have not moved on. The sooner you start making yourself a priority, the better off you will be for you and your daughter.
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