PandorasBox Posted March 10, 2009 Posted March 10, 2009 How do you know for sure, or what are some of the warning signs you might be dating a man who just wants a mother? My friend who recently started dating a new guy said she felt that way with him. She felt she was more of his mother than anything...he acted childish, but she did most everything for him and he seemed to enjoy it.....she has told me she is sick and tired of it and plans on telling him this afternoon after he gets off work she is going to break things off with him. She wanted to have an adult relationship, not a mother/child relationship. She also said she takes the blame for putting up with it an allowing herself to continue to do the things for him she has done. So how do you know when someone is just lazy in pretty much all aspects of the relationship and how much of it, is they are looking for a mother type figure?
Star Gazer Posted March 10, 2009 Posted March 10, 2009 Unfortunately, I think you have to spend some amount of time getting to know someone before you'll see their true colors. In a case like this, however, it shouldn't take too long before his selfish, lazy side reveals itself.
JackJack Posted March 10, 2009 Posted March 10, 2009 This is JMO, but, I think most of the time, if you're involved with someone who doesn't want to do their share in things, no matter what it is, chores, working on the relationship, and then they act like a child when they don't get their way etc, its probably a safe bet to say, they had alot of things done for them or never had to deal with certain aspects of a situation, so therefore its probably safe to say, they want a mother type figure. Someone who will take care of all other things, while they do nothing.
HappyAgain Posted March 10, 2009 Posted March 10, 2009 I was married to this type and it took me a long time to realize that the real problem in the marriage was that he was looking for a mother-type relationship. He left all the responsibilities to me, couldn't handle any kind of stress, acted like a petulant child when he didn't get his way. It didn't involve stuff like household chores, that he did but it was so much of the relationship responsibilities that he couldn't handle and the hard stuff in life like work, taxes, any financial stuff, paperwork, etc. I was an enabler too and didn't realize it for the longest time but I finally did and moved on from him. And am I glad that I did.
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