johnmmm Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 Hi all I have been broke up with my ex girl friend now for over a year. These days I would spend very little time thinking about her, once in a while it would cross my mind but in general I’m over it and have moved on.. A few nights ago I was in bed asleep when I got a phone call at around 3:30am from a withheld number. I didn’t answer it and let it ring out at first but when it rang for the second time curiosity got the best of me so I answered. It was my ex girlfriend! She was out on the town and by the sounds of it had a few too many drinks. I thought about just hanging up on her, switching my phone off and forgetting about it but I was curies as to why she had called so I didn’t. She started of with small talk but eventually she started poring her heart out and telling me she missed me and how she didn’t know what she had until she lost it she then went on to tell me how she has compared every other man she has been with to me and non of them have come clos! She said she does not think she will ever find anyone like me and asked if I think I would find anyone like her again to which I responded “I hope not, I don’t think one person can have that much bad luck” (I know it’s a bit sharp but it was 3:30am and I didn’t feel like beating round the bush with her) I always had a feeling she regretted breaking up with me but hearing her actually say it was a bit of a shock to be honest. I felt like this is just karma at work and what went round came back round and that her thoughts that the grass would be greener after breaking up with me where shattered by the reality that she just messed up a relationship that could have made her happy.. I am a bit confused as to why after so long she still feels like this because I know I don’t, I have moved on and my life is going pretty well at the minute. I haven’t thought about her in quite a while and don’t really get how she still has these seemingly strong feelings after such a long peride of time.. Anyone any thoughts on this one??
blondesmiler Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 She was drunk. Alot of women lose their self control when drunk, so texting ex's or someone they once dated just because their inner self control is all mixed up with vokda and wine, and if they are going home alone a twang of lonliness might bring on a train of thought, which included you and drunk mind goes hey I'll call him up. I wouldn't read too much into it or overthink it too much. Let it go, carry on as you were.....if she does get intouch then you'll know, if she doesn't you haven't been sitting there wasting your time and overthinking about it.
georgejungle Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 Try getting a call 10 YEARS after the fact. I'm sure she feels regret and the alcohol was a good catalyst. But i wouldn't blame it all on just being drunk and making a random call. It's been in her subconcious. She thinks about you i'm sure of it. It's up to you whether you act on it, but yeah, it's not totally weird of her to hang onto feeling for you or regret it a year later. I recently had an ex contact me 10 years after the fact to apologize for breaking up with me...10 YEARS AGO. She still felt regret and said she was naive and didn't realize what she had, she was sorry for hurting me, etc etc. It shocked the hell out of me. All thse crazy memories and feelings came back. But in the end, i was nice to her, but brushed her off. That was then, this is now. People change, maybe she's changed, but i've changed too and although i was in love with her at that time, i'm not anymore. That dorr closed a long time ago
dreamer76 Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 Try getting a call 10 YEARS after the fact. I'm sure she feels regret and the alcohol was a good catalyst. But i wouldn't blame it all on just being drunk and making a random call. It's been in her subconcious. She thinks about you i'm sure of it. It's up to you whether you act on it, but yeah, it's not totally weird of her to hang onto feeling for you or regret it a year later. I recently had an ex contact me 10 years after the fact to apologize for breaking up with me...10 YEARS AGO. She still felt regret and said she was naive and didn't realize what she had, she was sorry for hurting me, etc etc. It shocked the hell out of me. All thse crazy memories and feelings came back. But in the end, i was nice to her, but brushed her off. That was then, this is now. People change, maybe she's changed, but i've changed too and although i was in love with her at that time, i'm not anymore. That dorr closed a long time ago I agree with this completely. She was drunk, but she was thinking about you, or she would not have called you. It's been five years since I broke up with my ex, and I still think about him (and I am in a commited relationship and have a daughter) Even though we have talked since our break-up (though not since '06) I sometimes feel like I should send him an email, and apologize for the break-up(I dated his friend right after the break-up:eek:, and when he found out, everyone could tell he was very hurt) I still have a place in my heart for him, even after 5 years, and honestly, I don't think that will ever change-but I would love to go out for coffee with him sometime to get decent closure. Okay, so I have rambled on and on, but basically, I do think she still cares about you, and may think about wanting you back as well-it is up to you how you deal with it. Maybe over coffee you could talk to her, and let her know how you are feeling, and also maybe give her a chance to get closure-often when you see someone after some time, you realize why you are no longer together, and finally get the chance to move on. Hope I have helped-Good Luck!
Author johnmmm Posted March 10, 2009 Author Posted March 10, 2009 I agree with this completely. She was drunk, but she was thinking about you, or she would not have called you. It's been five years since I broke up with my ex, and I still think about him (and I am in a commited relationship and have a daughter) Even though we have talked since our break-up (though not since '06) I sometimes feel like I should send him an email, and apologize for the break-up(I dated his friend right after the break-up:eek:, and when he found out, everyone could tell he was very hurt) I still have a place in my heart for him, even after 5 years, and honestly, I don't think that will ever change-but I would love to go out for coffee with him sometime to get decent closure. Okay, so I have rambled on and on, but basically, I do think she still cares about you, and may think about wanting you back as well-it is up to you how you deal with it. Maybe over coffee you could talk to her, and let her know how you are feeling, and also maybe give her a chance to get closure-often when you see someone after some time, you realize why you are no longer together, and finally get the chance to move on. Hope I have helped-Good Luck! You have not rambled at all. It very interesting hearing from someone on the other side. thank you.. Id like to ask a few question if you don’t mind. When you broke up with him how long did it take for you to realised you still had some feeling? Did it bother you when you realised he was getting over you or had gotten over you? If you where having coffee with him and you found out he also still had feeling for you how do you think you would react? Do you regret breaking up with him???
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