clintsgirl Posted March 6, 2009 Posted March 6, 2009 Let me give a little backround before i let ya know whats going on. My boyfriend of 3 yrs was previously married for 6 yrs. He 2 children young and got married young. I have known him for 7 yrs now, we might at work, and were friends for a very long time. Things were rough between him and his ex for the last 2 yrs of there marriage. He told her he wanted out on a saturday, and that monday She was filing for divorce. He gave her everything the house, furniture, which was fine cause she was going to have the kids. He walked out with his clothes, grandmother's hutch, and a tv. The ex was very upset and emotional during this time, she was hurt and sad, and i 100% feel for her, i know it was heart breaking. My boyfriend had a very good job and paid his child support plus some, he loves his children. With in 5 months, she sold everything in the house, got a boob job, some tatoos, and moved out of the town and house to her boyfriends house in the country. She got the house in the divorce, and my bf's name is still on it, so she still had to pay for it. The children were obviously hurt cause of the divorce (ages 7 & 9 at the time). When she decided to move she took the kids out of there school and away from there friends, they were extremely upset. During this time, she would always bug my bf for money, how she was broke, and would make it sound like the kids were eating bread and butter. Mind u she has a decent job, and gets over 400 a week in child support. And the cost of living were we live isnt bad at all. If it had to do with the kids he was all about contributing. His son at this time 10, hated living in the country, and didnt get along w/ her new bf. he came and lived with us, they went to court, and since they are in a small town, he still had to pay 100 wk for his daughter, even though they each have custody now of a child. This women has mad our lives a living hell, she would call constantly about money, she assualted me at her daughters softball game, she has lied etc... My boyfriend ended up getting laid off of his job last yr, so the courts said he didnt have to pay child support, due to him being laid off and them both having a child. Of course she flipped out, she took him to court a couple more times for insane stuff to get money but it didnt work. Over the summer she ended up getting married to the new beau and becoming pregnant. You would think she has moved on with her new family. My bf and i still contribute a ton to his daughter we love her, clothes, camps, spending money etc. His son has been with us for almost 2 yrs now, and she doesnt do a thing for him unless she HAS to. A little after the first of the yr she tried to claim there son on her taxes, when she found out my bf did (duh he has custody), she threatened to take him to court if he didnt give her some $. He didnt fall for it this time, thank goodness!! So we get our taxes back, he wants to save some just in case crazy takes him to court and he needs to pay for a lawyer. Well about a week ago the crazy ex calls now 8 months pregnant, saying there daughter needs 6k worth of orthodonitics done. and insurance only covers $1000, she needs to come up w/ 2k for them to begin and of course she doesnt have it. And how sorry she is for being a bitch sometimes, its just her hormones, and if he gives her money, she will sign something that she will NEVER take him to court again, and how if there son needs work she will put up the money for that when the time comes. One shes full of it, even if she had all the money in the world she would still try to get money from him, 2 there is no way on this earth she would pay for the same w/ her son, what if we take him next month?!? obviously she doesnt have the money for it. I understand its his daughter, and he loves her, i do too. She is the type of person that would bad mouth her father to her, to make him look like the bad person, which he is the farthest thing from. We are both laid off right now, and really need that money to stay afloat. When i learned about this i got extremely angry and still am. He doesnt want her new step dad to contribute to a thing for his kids. So of course he is going to pay. Do i have a right to be pissed? i know this is going to go on forever, cause she knows how to work him......
bean1 Posted March 6, 2009 Posted March 6, 2009 I'll tell you the same thing I tell every girlfriend (I deal with family custody issues at work on a constant basis): It isn't your place because this is between your boyfriend and his ex-wife. From her perspective, you are some woman who has only been dating her husband for 3 years (you didn't share a wedding, the pregnancies, etc). I'm sure she would have an interesting side to the story too (for example, "neither of them work!"). I'm not saying you're wrong and I'm not saying you're right, but as a girlfriend of a few years, it really isn't your place to judge their interactions regarding the children. Perhaps, when you are married to him and are officially a "stepmother", then that is different. But not now. Quite frankly, if you have to support a child and you have lost your job, then you should be at Burger King with a resume in hand until you get something better.
Dexter Morgan Posted March 6, 2009 Posted March 6, 2009 The only thing an X-Wife is entitled to is the right to take him back for more child support if his income increased. THATS IT. nothing else.
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