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How to tell a woman you'd rather just be firends...


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Posted
Do we go out a time or two before deciding if we're interested? Do we reserve the right to not be interested? Yup, afraid so.

Yea but if theres def no physical attraction on the guys part right from the get go I mean no doubt at all in his mind like this situation seamed to be.

 

Then why even go on a 2ed date? it gives the poor girl the wrong idea and just gets her hopes up no? Every one has the right to not be interested of course I never augured that!

 

Its just some games that people play some times and what gets me is guys always point the finger and accuse women of these games and were all flaky and so on but they do it to..

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Posted
Because your not hanging out with them for their friendship alone your using them to see what else better may come along?

 

Thats what I'm getting at and you yourself admit to that no?

Didn't you say something along the lines of I hang out with some women to see if they have any decent looking friends?

 

So I'm sorry but no matter how you dress that up to me its using some one for nothing but your own interests in the end.

 

I think I explained myself pretty well. After reading what I have posted I don't see myself as using her I just know the added benefits of having female friends.

 

ie: Having a mechanic as a friend. He can help fix your car. I'm not using him for just that. I also like to drink beers with him and watch 24.

Posted

Bob, do you have other female friends that you've never dated or been in a romantic relationship with, who don't have or potentially don't have hot friends?

Posted
but really mean it. I went on a date with this chick and she was really cool. Only problem is I'm not physically attracted to her. However, I would not mind being friends with her. She likes a lot of the same stuff I do. She asked ME out to a second date and I said I'd call her. Well time is up and I have to give her the verdict.

 

I don't want to lead her on. Should I just bail and not even bother?

 

Also my strategy has always been all women have female friends. Be friends with women and you may have access to those female friends. That's pretty much my idea. Be friends with her and see if she's got any decent looking friends. lol

 

 

Well... atleast its a very good thing that you know you do not want to be with her rather then dating and breaking her heart..

for a women's point of view, i would have a guy tell me the truth and be friends with me, then play with my feelings.

i think you should tell her your feelings (in a nice way) and see if she is comfortable with you guys just being friends.. if not then it's cool..

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Posted
Bob, do you have other female friends that you've never dated or been in a romantic relationship with, who don't have or potentially don't have hot friends?

 

Yes indeed I do. Mostly from College. They might not have hot friends but one is very attractive. But she's always in a relationship. Been waiting one out for some time now lol.

Posted
I think I explained myself pretty well. After reading what I have posted I don't see myself as using her I just know the added benefits of having female friends.

 

ie: Having a mechanic as a friend. He can help fix your car. I'm not using him for just that. I also like to drink beers with him and watch 24.

Ive had mechanic friends who I didn't even ask to fix my car when it broke down in the past.

 

I guess it boils down to theres opportunistic people in this world and unopportunistic ones I happen to be the later but hey what ever works for you!

  • Author
Posted

Please tell us - how does it feel being so damn perfect?

Posted
Because your not hanging out with them for their friendship alone your using them to see what else better may come along?

 

Thats what I'm getting at and you yourself admit to that no?

Didn't you say something along the lines of I hang out with some women to see if they have any decent looking friends?

 

So I'm sorry but no matter how you dress that up to me its using some one for nothing but your own interests in the end.

 

I agree....................

Posted
Please tell us - how does it feel being so damn perfect?

Oh please... :rolleyes:

Posted
I agree....................

 

The fact remains that he went out with her for just one date. Neither owes the other anything. If a friendship is agreed upon, it could only be mutually beneficial.

Posted
The fact remains that he went out with her for just one date. Neither owes the other anything. If a friendship is agreed upon, it could only be mutually beneficial.

 

But it seems that he's partly using her to see if she has hot friends, which is wrong.

Posted

That happens to women all the time.. they meet a guy.. there is no chemistry but a friendship can be possible due to mutual interests and same tastes.. etc...

 

I say.. be honest with her.. there is nothing to be ashame of in saying that there is no physical chemistry...

Posted
But it seems that he's partly using her to see if she has hot friends, which is wrong.

 

The only difference between this guy and anyone else who wants more friends, is that he's bluntly admitting what he's looking for in this case. He also sees friendship compatibility between himself and the girl. It would be wrong if he didn't like her or wasn't planning on spending time with HER, instead only with her friends.

Posted
The fact remains that he went out with her for just one date. Neither owes the other anything. If a friendship is agreed upon, it could only be mutually beneficial.

I agree if its a mutual friendship and they bough honestly enjoy each others company and if he along the lines happed to meet a nice girl out of that friendship then good on em.

 

I'm not trying to crucify him like he seams to think here and no I'm not perfect. I'm just trying to point out the difference between what I see a friendship like that to be and what he said he dose thats all..;)

Posted
The only difference between this guy and anyone else who wants more friends, is that he's bluntly admitting what he's looking for in this case. He also sees friendship compatibility between himself and the girl. It would be wrong if he didn't like her or wasn't planning on spending time with HER, instead only with her friends.

 

I suspect he's being more manipulative/opportunistic than he's willing to admit.

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