Green Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 I don't like pets, my gf does like pets. When I met her and started dating her she had no pets. She now talks about getting a cat atleast once a week or a dog as a compromise. We don't live togather but I have told her that if she had a pet I seriously would not want to come over anymore to visit her place and she would always have to come to mine. I do like dogs more then cats but for the most part I don't enjoy pets and have never hid that from her our first dat actualy involved going to the beach and a little puppy that came over to her scared her she said because she was sitting on the ground and I thought she didn't like animals either so I told her so she has known that I don't like pets. What makes this even more serious is the girl I am dating and I have goten very serious over the past few months to the point where I'm actualy considering and leaning toward moving in togather next fall when our leases expire. I don't know what to do I hate cats and for the most part dogs are cool but I don't want to be living with one or have a gf who constantly has to wory about walking the dog. We are both busy people as it is and dogs take so much and cats take less but the hair and I smell cats! Oh well I'm sure she'll eventualy just drop the subject I have been pretty firm on my hatred of pets from our first date
alphamale Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 Oh well I'm sure she'll eventualy just drop the subject I have been pretty firm on my hatred of pets from our first date sounds like she's just playing with your head but if push comes to shove tell her its either you or a pet, not both...be a man and stand your ground
Author Green Posted March 5, 2009 Author Posted March 5, 2009 sounds like she's just playing with your head but if push comes to shove tell her its either you or a pet, not both...be a man and stand your ground haha I will be a man but I'm also using games like I have no idea if I'm alergic but I've been saying I think I might be alergic. She does stuff like point at cats and pictures of kittens and surfs the animal shelter adoption page infront of me. Seriously though I have made it pretty clear I will stop visiting her at her place if she gets one and we will not live togather
era Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 Seriously though I have made it pretty clear I will stop visiting her at her place if she gets one and we will not live togather "Fine - then don't" is how I'd reply if I was your girlfriend...pet hater.
curiousnycgirl Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 Wow interesting post - if a man ever told me he hated pets, and they were a non starter for him, the relationship would be over, it's really that simple to me. Just like you do not understand the attraction, I cannot understand your hatred of pets. When I met my b/f I had 2 cats and a horse. He had a dog, whom I adored (he passed away). At this point I have a dog, one cat (lost the other to cancer) and a horse - to the dog he is number two, to my cat (the slut) he is number one - the horse is all mine. I have always loved dogs, but chose to have cats because they require significantly less time and attention. Now that I have a dog, I feel a lot more tethered to my house - at times that is very challenging to me. My b/f knows how I feel about my pets, and while he doesn't always agree, he understands. For example at one point someone offered my a lot of money for my horse (six figures) - and there was no way I would even consider the offer - he's not for sale, he's my baby. My b/f swallowed hard and said of course. Hey you are entirely entitled to your views on this subject, and so is your g/f. I am afraid however that you two are totally incompatible on this subject and if neither is willing to compromise - I suggest you go your separate ways.
Author Green Posted March 5, 2009 Author Posted March 5, 2009 "Fine - then don't" is how I'd reply if I was your girlfriend...pet hater. her reply was more WHY??? cause she wouldn't want me not to visit her house anymore and she really wants us to move intogather when our leases end. We are in love but in all fairness I have been nothing but honest about how I feel about pets never hid it right from the first dog insident at the beach with a cute little puppy in fact I said in the car god I hate kids and pets at the beach they always get sand on me and it came true both with kids and pets that they.. .(although I am open to having kids of my own one day) Wow interesting post - if a man ever told me he hated pets, and they were a non starter for him, the relationship would be over, it's really that simple to me. Just like you do not understand the attraction, I cannot understand your hatred of pets. When I met my b/f I had 2 cats and a horse. He had a dog, whom I adored (he passed away). At this point I have a dog, one cat (lost the other to cancer) and a horse - to the dog he is number two, to my cat (the slut) he is number one - the horse is all mine. I have always loved dogs, but chose to have cats because they require significantly less time and attention. Now that I have a dog, I feel a lot more tethered to my house - at times that is very challenging to me. My b/f knows how I feel about my pets, and while he doesn't always agree, he understands. For example at one point someone offered my a lot of money for my horse (six figures) - and there was no way I would even consider the offer - he's not for sale, he's my baby. My b/f swallowed hard and said of course. Hey you are entirely entitled to your views on this subject, and so is your g/f. I am afraid however that you two are totally incompatible on this subject and if neither is willing to compromise - I suggest you go your separate ways. The thing is that is not what she did and we are both very attached to eachother met in October and seriously dating since and were talking about living togather in the fall... so seriously I can't just walk away from her over this I have to work through it. I can seriously see myself marying her and making a life but I really do genuinly hate cats and don't want the responsibility of a dog or a gf wit a dog who lives with me or wants me to visit. Shes never even had a dog shes just talking about dogs because I do hate them less then cats
SoulSearch_CO Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 Sounds to me like she's trying to get rid of you in a round-about way. Especially if you've been so vocal of your hatred of animals and she's being so vocal about getting one. Heehee. Serves you right.
socialight Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 So she gets a dog and loses you, right? Explain again why this is a bad deal for her? Seriously dude, if you can't handle a dog, how are you going to handle kids or real stress. It's a test, and right now, you are failing big time. Get the right dog and get on board! And for god's sake don't move in together until you are married.
BCCA Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 If she doesnt live with you, and youre really not allergic, youre kind of being a douche. I grew up with a mother thats loves animals, and has several cats, and if a girl I was dating said she wouldnt even go to a house that has pets for no good reason but that she doesnt like them, see ya. I dont like sex in the city, either, but Im not going to say that if a girl owns the DVD im not going to her house. I'm sure you dont like tampons, midol, or granny panties, either, but I doubt youre telling women you wont go to their house if they own any of those things. I guess I dont understand why youre making such a big deal out of it. If youre not allergic, not going to live with the animals or take care of them at all, who cares? I think youre being kind of a jerk here, sorry to say.
Sam Spade Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 So she gets a dog and loses you, right? Explain again why this is a bad deal for her? Seriously dude, if you can't handle a dog, how are you going to handle kids or real stress. It's a test, and right now, you are failing big time. Get the right dog and get on board! And for god's sake don't move in together until you are married. This here guy brings an important point: if you don't like pets, that's fine. But, if there is no partocular reason, you're missing on many things: 1) Chicks DIG guys who like pets and take care of them. They make whole sorts of crazy (though benefitial to you) conclusions based on this. So, whether you stay with this girl or no, a dog instantly makes you more attractive to most girls. 2) Related to 1), having a pet actually teaches some things, such as responsibility, patience, understanding. So it's useful 3) Related to 2) - you need some crayzee doggie or a cat to mess things up a little in your life. (Otherwise there is a real danger of becoming an annoying single with a perfect little life....). It'll take adjustment, but I bet you'd appreciate it eventually. So, as long as you're not (violently) allergic, you're probably doing yourself a disservise by raising a stink over it. I understand the not giving in point, but you can gracefully finesse your way out of it, without looking like just nodding in agreement.
alphamale Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 Seriously dude, if you can't handle a dog, how are you going to handle kids or real stress. thats total baloney...there are bad parents who have pets and there are good parents that have no pets and everything in between. there is no co-relation between the two... so if i have a dog/pet then i will be a better parent? how totally idiotic
Trialbyfire Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 Animal lover of all kinds here! If a guy isn't an animal lover, I would also reconsider the relationship. My reasoning is that if it's a serious relationship, the long-term implications are that our children won't have the pleasure of having pets. They're wonderful fuzzy/sleek little/big creatures who have amazing personalities. This is so good for kids, to learn to take care of and befriend animals, whether it's a hamster, cat or dog. It teaches them a sense of responsibility for their loved ones. This doesn't mean I'm going to bash on you Green. You have your dating preferences, just like I have mine.
confused_2008 Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 RE: Sam Spade's post, do women actually look more favorably on a guy with a dog? Is it seen as him being able to be responsible for a life other than his own or is this kind of a myth?
fral945 Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 I don't understand the pet thing either, but just accept it as one of those man/woman differences you'll never understand. Just make sure your GF doesn't get out of hand and creates a zoo. I dated a girl once that had 2 80 lb dogs, 3 cats, 2 parakeets, and 2 gerbils in her house, all loose at the same time. I attributed it to her love of chaos and drama.
alphamale Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 If a guy isn't an animal lover, I would also reconsider the relationship. My reasoning is that if it's a serious relationship, the long-term implications are that our children won't have the pleasure of having pets. i've met many people that are quite well-adjusted and successful who didn't have pets as children...
era Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 RE: Sam Spade's post, do women actually look more favorably on a guy with a dog? Is it seen as him being able to be responsible for a life other than his own or is this kind of a myth? not a myth...
Trialbyfire Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 i've met many people that are quite well-adjusted and successful who didn't have pets as children... That's not even close to being my point. Pets and children, for me, go hand-in-hand. This doesn't mean it works for everyone else, as explained in the balance of my original post.
OpenBook Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 "Fine - then don't" is how I'd reply if I was your girlfriend...pet hater. And I would take that one step further: "Fine - then don't let my dog bite you in the @ss on your way out the door." No offense to the OP or anyone else... but Dogs & Cats Rule. Any man who makes me choose between him and my animals is going to come out on the short end of THAT stick.
confused_2008 Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 not a myth... What about a guy with >1 cat? (not me just wondering )
era Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 What about a guy with >1 cat? (not me just wondering ) Cats are wonderful!...
OpenBook Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 What about a guy with >1 cat? (not me just wondering ) Fascinating. I'd be enthralled.
alphamale Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 Cats are wonderful!... no animal that treats their owner like crap is "wonderful"
confused_2008 Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 no animal that treats their owner like crap is "wonderful" Agreed. Cats just lay around thinking the world revolves around them and all we should do is give them attention.
Author Green Posted March 5, 2009 Author Posted March 5, 2009 my gf says she knew from the begining I don't like cats but thought I'd be open to a dog. She said she doesn't want a dog now but maybe someday 2 years and I said fine maybe someday and hopefuly thats the end of her pulling up the adoption website and telling me its her favorite site... she points at her kitten poster ahhh
era Posted March 5, 2009 Posted March 5, 2009 She pulls up the adoption website and tells you it's her favorite site?....that just warms my heart. You don't deserve her.
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