Nagini Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 My boyfriend calls a me a lot. morning and night ... Except his behavior has changed. For the last month nearly every Tuesday night he never calls me back or answers his phone. 4 weeks ago he sai dhe went out with a friend tuesday night he did call me very late and very drunk that night. was acting overtly sexual his behavior started to change a bit after that. for the next two saturdays he feigned being sick (on Valentines Day, but sitll took me out at 7 pm but wanted to drive me home at 9:30 pm because he felt sick [i insisted on staying over to care for him] he did a mid week sleepover date which was fun an di felt close to him again (no we havent had sex yet, just everything but) then the next saturday he took me out and drove me home at 10:45 pm saying he had to be up early (he took a 'business phone call' outside at 8:30 pm in the middle of our dinner) and this last Saturday he went out with old buddies from high school .. I offered to go with him o rmeet him afterwards. he said no (he did get together with people, but had a strange woman sitting next to him in two photos on facebook) we did go out this sunday. just a movie... He called me 4 times yesterday and acted sweet Now again its Tuesday again and he called me at 6pm asked me to call him back. I did at 7 pm and emailed him again at 9 pm No call back... Should I guess he is seeing someone on tuesday now and ALSO seeing them late Saturday nights ?
missdependant Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 It's possible.. and I would probably question that too, especially the Valentines Day incident. But then again, he could be out gambling or have some secret fantasy football club going on or something. You should probably just ask him.
chrislovestosurf Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 if youre this bad now, youre going to drive him nuts. Calm the hell down and talk to him before you jump to conclusions like that. God.
2sunny Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 the Tuesday thing has been a steady pattern and now the late Saturday thing is becoming suspicious. you might have to have him followed next Tuesday or late Saturday to see what he's up to since he won't be honest. his actions and words don't match so i would wonder. but you've wondered long enough and now it's time to find the truth.
Author Nagini Posted March 4, 2009 Author Posted March 4, 2009 the Tuesday thing has been a steady pattern and now the late Saturday thing is becoming suspicious. you might have to have him followed next Tuesday or late Saturday to see what he's up to since he won't be honest. his actions and words don't match so i would wonder. but you've wondered long enough and now it's time to find the truth. so i texted him at 11:30pm... nothing... also he told me he calls his son EVERY night at 9pm no matter what to say goodnight. so he easily couldve called me then too. Yes I need to find out NOW. My Mom stated it well, if a bit dramatically....The day of reckoning has come !
2sunny Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 maybe it's some gal that only is available on Tuesday evenings and late Saturday... when he's with you does he stop during the evening and call his son? makes me wonder if he calls someone else while he's at it... are there other missing periods of time during the week when you stop and think about his regular schedule? people are generally creatures of habit. it should be easy to find out if you're paying attention.
BobSacamento Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 Reminds me a song I once heard by Kanye West... it was called "Paranoid"
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 The whole "taking a business call" at 8:30 on a Saturday night is suspicious. Is that the same night he got sick and left at 9:30?
Author Nagini Posted March 4, 2009 Author Posted March 4, 2009 maybe it's some gal that only is available on Tuesday evenings and late Saturday... when he's with you does he stop during the evening and call his son? makes me wonder if he calls someone else while he's at it... are there other missing periods of time during the week when you stop and think about his regular schedule? people are generally creatures of habit. it should be easy to find out if you're paying attention. he always calls his son in front of me except for one time Valentines day and has made ALL his business calls in front of me too, except for the one biz call he made that saturday night. there arent any other missing time periods. he calls me in the morning (so early that i may or may not be awake) and/or mid afternoon and then between 8-midnight. and he always checks his facebook when he's home. but not tonight. and I had already asked him about his biz meetings for the day when he called me tuesday morning... he said he had one at 11 am and another 4 pm.
2sunny Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 not really Bob, when you know the past history that's not included in this thread... read her other threads. maybe he's seeing a married gal that's only available when her hubby has a Tuesday scheduling or something.
Author Nagini Posted March 4, 2009 Author Posted March 4, 2009 The whole "taking a business call" at 8:30 on a Saturday night is suspicious. Is that the same night he got sick and left at 9:30? no that was the week after... But that night he suddenly said he had to drive me home at 10:45pm because he had to be up early sunday. (mind you this is a guy who is always up by 6-7 am and used to stay out until 2-3 am with me) I asked him to call when he got back home but he didnt.. But then sunday morning he emailed me at 9 am that he was up and rushing around...
Author Nagini Posted March 4, 2009 Author Posted March 4, 2009 Reminds me a song I once heard by Kanye West... it was called "Paranoid" Nope Im just very logical and my line of work is to actually follow patterns to vet people in background checks. If something sticks out that is cause for alarm. Go talk to talk LE and theyll explain it to you. Human are creatures of habit.
Author Nagini Posted March 4, 2009 Author Posted March 4, 2009 The whole "taking a business call" at 8:30 on a Saturday night is suspicious. Is that the same night he got sick and left at 9:30? he always takes biz calls in front of me so thats what didnt make any sense (that he went outside for 15 minutes) and whats weirder is he said he left a voicemail fo rthe guy he was trying to reach (a 15 minute vm ??)
Cherry Blossom 35 Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 I think that there are more than a couple of signs here that something is going on. Could you confront him? Or would you rather just break up with him?
2sunny Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 i think she's asked him and he indicated he wasn't seeing anyone else... so, i smell a big rat! like i've said before. you are always available for him- i'd turn down a date and avoid a few phone calls. he needs to know that you aren't "always" at his beck and call. if he HAS to make more of an effort because he's afraid you MAY be seeing someone else, that's not such a bad thing. just tell him you have plans with a friend this weekend... or has he not asked you out yet for this weekend?
9Lives Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 if youre this bad now, youre going to drive him nuts. Calm the hell down and talk to him before you jump to conclusions like that. God. LOL>>>LOL..You are so funny. I knew you was from up north with that type of response.
Author Nagini Posted March 4, 2009 Author Posted March 4, 2009 i think she's asked him and he indicated he wasn't seeing anyone else... so, i smell a big rat! like i've said before. you are always available for him- i'd turn down a date and avoid a few phone calls. he needs to know that you aren't "always" at his beck and call. if he HAS to make more of an effort because he's afraid you MAY be seeing someone else, that's not such a bad thing. just tell him you have plans with a friend this weekend... or has he not asked you out yet for this weekend? On Sunday he said we should do a sleepover mid week. but didnt make anything definite. wednesday used to be our weekight and he would ask me out for our next date ahead of time. He hasnt asked me out for this Saturday either... I may see him Saturday but not the rest of this week, nor will I be speaking to him 3 times a day. It is not cool that he expects me to answer the phone and always call him back within 2 hours, but flips out if I dont... If he drops me off again earlier this Saturday I will be turning around and driving back with my best friend who lives on my block.
2sunny Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 did you say he lives 40 minutes away? i'd be tempted to see if he's home tonight... alone! does he park the car outside so there is a way to find out if he's home or if someone is there with him?
2sunny Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 the more i think about it - the more i think it's not worth continuing with him at all anymore. when a man makes me worry or wonder about his character at all... it's time to walk away and allow him to try to fool someone else. his silly games can be played with a willing partner. you've given him plenty of times to be honest - and he always leaves you wondering again... not worth it to me.
Author Nagini Posted March 4, 2009 Author Posted March 4, 2009 did you say he lives 40 minutes away? i'd be tempted to see if he's home tonight... alone! does he park the car outside so there is a way to find out if he's home or if someone is there with him? he lives 20 minutes away BUT its in gated community and he always pulls his car into his huge private garage I just found a great new blog http://howtotellifaguyisajerk.blogspot.com/2007/11/signs-guy-is-cheating.html My gut keeps beating its little fists into my sides. I think I should just heed it. Thinking things over i think he is starting to pick little fights with me (telling me he was angry and mad because i didnt call back, calling my friends weird, accusing me of being too busy for him) and hes stopped talking about the future like he used to he would talk about vacation together, going to france in may, going on his boat, hell even joking we should have a kid within a few years no more future talk. i think that speaks volumes..
Author Nagini Posted March 4, 2009 Author Posted March 4, 2009 you've given him plenty of times to be honest - and he always leaves you wondering again... not worth it to me. yep... and calling himself nefarious several times was the stupidest thing ever. how can I trust him ? if i do and he messes up he can always say he warned me he could be nefarious.
Mahatma Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 I have not read your other threads, but just from this one you have led me to believe that he is cheating on you. However, you could be making huge errors here. Only you can really know what is going on. As soon as you have to "check up" on him, you should just say no and end it with him. If you go to checkup and he really is there alone, you will just feel like a complete ass. If you find someone there, you will feel even worse. It is not worth it to be in a relationship with trust issues like this.
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