lammie Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 I say I'm generally a confidence person especially when it comes to work. But when it comes to guys/relationships/love, I'm a wreck. I'm a total different person, I become a little mouse and hide. I haven't been in a long term relationship for 10 years. i've dated and seen a few people in between but nothing last longer than a mere 3 dates, longest was 2 months. It's always either, they left me for another girl or has gone back to their ex's or just simply never called me again. Thought of it over and over again, I have no idea why. Neither could i thought of anything that i could have done wrong and there's absolutely nothing wrong with me. I've always just brushed it aside and declare it as bad luck. I feel so jaded about guys and relationships, i don't even bother look anymore. I recently told a friend my feelings for him, I've liked him for 4 years (full story: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t181466/) but got rejected by him again. It really shattered my confidence, the hurt and the never healed broken heart. I've really lost faith in men and love. I've tried online dating, it was fun, rejected loads, also got rejected loads. I get chat up lots at clubs/bars or everytime i go out but the guys are usually too young or I'm not interested. How can one restore faith in relationships and romance? How can one gain more confidence in that department?
MN randomguy Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 How are guys too young? I got told this and figured that its a bull**** rejection. What about younger guys is undesirable?
Author lammie Posted March 4, 2009 Author Posted March 4, 2009 Well, i only consider guys whose age is either +5/-5 for me. That's my range. I'm 32, but look about 24. Younger guys mentioned are first year at uni = 19 or in uni 22. Younger guys are fun to be with. Don't get me wrong. It's just we're on different times in our lives, i want to settle with family, but you can't tell me a 19/22 year old will be rather to give up his late night parties and settle down with family. Also, the mentality is different when someone is still in school but one is full swing in his/her career. It's a different lifestyle.
Faithless1979 Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 I will be watching this post with interest. Am in the same boat with regards to men and relationships.
era Posted March 9, 2009 Posted March 9, 2009 How can one gain more confidence in that department? Your belief about yourself is the most telling factor in determining your level of confidence in that department.
CanadaGuy Posted March 13, 2009 Posted March 13, 2009 I say I'm generally a confidence person especially when it comes to work. But when it comes to guys/relationships/love, I'm a wreck. I'm a total different person, I become a little mouse and hide. I haven't been in a long term relationship for 10 years. i've dated and seen a few people in between but nothing last longer than a mere 3 dates, longest was 2 months. It's always either, they left me for another girl or has gone back to their ex's or just simply never called me again. Thought of it over and over again, I have no idea why. Neither could i thought of anything that i could have done wrong and there's absolutely nothing wrong with me. I've always just brushed it aside and declare it as bad luck. I feel so jaded about guys and relationships, i don't even bother look anymore. I recently told a friend my feelings for him, I've liked him for 4 years (full story: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t181466/) but got rejected by him again. It really shattered my confidence, the hurt and the never healed broken heart. I've really lost faith in men and love. I've tried online dating, it was fun, rejected loads, also got rejected loads. I get chat up lots at clubs/bars or everytime i go out but the guys are usually too young or I'm not interested. How can one restore faith in relationships and romance? How can one gain more confidence in that department? Get in great shape, so you are proud of your body, a body that YOU think looks good to YOU, a body you can walk in the beach in a bikini and feel comfortable. And do what you want to do, and you will find someone that likes the same things. If you only do what he wants, your not yourself.
Author lammie Posted March 15, 2009 Author Posted March 15, 2009 Get in great shape, so you are proud of your body, a body that YOU think looks good to YOU, a body you can walk in the beach in a bikini and feel comfortable. And do what you want to do, and you will find someone that likes the same things. If you only do what he wants, your not yourself. It has nothing to do with my body, i love my body. I'm pretty fit – i take ballet plus a couple other dance classes and training for 1/4 marathon. I'm 5' 4", 125 lbs.
CanadaGuy Posted March 16, 2009 Posted March 16, 2009 It has nothing to do with my body, i love my body. I'm pretty fit – i take ballet plus a couple other dance classes and training for 1/4 marathon. I'm 5' 4", 125 lbs. That's great! Keep doing what you are doing, and find friends in your circle of hobbies. And stay away for the serious "talk" for a while, it can scare guys away. They may really be interested, but many guys get scared if it get to serious to fast. Just have fun, and things will fall in place. Good luck with the marathon! P.S. If you train, try to find a group to train with, in Toronto we have groups set up by the Running Room (they sell running shoes) Makes it more fun, and you meet people witht eh same interest.
Author lammie Posted March 16, 2009 Author Posted March 16, 2009 Actually, i grew up in Toronto but i live in the UK now. I know the Running Room. Will try to seek groups here in the UK.
Recommended Posts