Dollie Posted March 3, 2009 Posted March 3, 2009 I was with him for 2 years, I have posted a few threads which were posted when I was angry and out for retribution I did not deserve to be treated this way and thrown away like yesterday's rubbish for a 21 year old! How can he live with himself? I busted him and he called me up when he was with her telling ME that we split up a year ago! WTF .. He then text me apologizing and today I sent a text telling him that his lies will catch him up, he replied telling me not to call or text him again. I have no intention of it but I am soooooooo angry!!!! How can I just let this go when he has disrespected me so badly? I made a facebook name to talk to this girl and find out the facts and what she has told me has astounded me, he has basically lied to her and me so badly and I did not think he would do that! The way he can lie is unbelievable and I just did not see it!! One day I hope that he will know what he has lost and will suffer for what he has done Has anyone else been through this?
clv0116 Posted March 3, 2009 Posted March 3, 2009 He's been trying to break up with you for almost 6 months now by the sounds of it. You're still moaning about it and trying to sabotage his life. Drop it for the good of everyone.
Citizen Erased Posted March 3, 2009 Posted March 3, 2009 Is it an impossible concept to stick to the one thread?
stillafool Posted March 3, 2009 Posted March 3, 2009 I have read your previous posts and it doesn't seem like you were thrown away to me. It seems that it had become apparent that the two of you couldn't get along (with all the breakups and your not wanting to marry him) that he took the (coward's way) and started seeing someone else before he completely broke it off with you. So many people do this and it hurts when you don't see it coming. If I were you I would leave the (18 year old) alone and not talk to her anymore about her relationship with your ex. It is pretty obvious that she has strong feelings for him (I don't care what she says) or she wouldn't be seeing him for 7 months already. Also talking to her will just keep you in pain. I imagine your ex is quite proud of hisself for landing an 18 yr. old and he is 40. Well good for him. Just move on and remind yourself of what you said when you first broke up - He wasn't right for you.
clv0116 Posted March 3, 2009 Posted March 3, 2009 Is it an impossible concept to stick to the one thread? Maybe if she keeps trying she will get answers she likes better.
lonelygurl Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 I was with him for 2 years, I have posted a few threads which were posted when I was angry and out for retribution I did not deserve to be treated this way and thrown away like yesterday's rubbish for a 21 year old! How can he live with himself? I busted him and he called me up when he was with her telling ME that we split up a year ago! WTF .. He then text me apologizing and today I sent a text telling him that his lies will catch him up, he replied telling me not to call or text him again. I have no intention of it but I am soooooooo angry!!!! How can I just let this go when he has disrespected me so badly? I made a facebook name to talk to this girl and find out the facts and what she has told me has astounded me, he has basically lied to her and me so badly and I did not think he would do that! The way he can lie is unbelievable and I just did not see it!! One day I hope that he will know what he has lost and will suffer for what he has done Has anyone else been through this? I have read through your posts and some of the reponses you have received. Some are pretty harsh. You are hurting from being dumped. By the sounds of it, it was never an "official" dump. I can understand the pain you feel that he is seeing someone new and younger, and especially if he was seeing her while still dating you. I have been in that place myself, even though my X swears he wasn't. They all lie. Going on to Facebook to find out information and attempt to break them up is obsessive behaviour. You should try to learn about it and stop the behaviour. I would suggest that you try to pick up the book called Obessive Love: When it Hurts To Much To Let Go by Susan Forward. It is a very good read, and may help you understand some of the behaviour and why you feel so obsessed with him. She is a therapist who uses case studies of previous patients, some who have ended up in jail due to obessive behaviour of not letting go of an X. Try to shift your focus away from him, her and Facebook and put it on yourself. Read about breakups, the loss of a love and grieving. Rather than feeding your obsessive addiction.
Trialbyfire Posted March 4, 2009 Posted March 4, 2009 If this is the first time you've been cheated on, it's going to hit you hard. It's a combination of many things going on in your mind. Another way to look at it is that he didn't do this to you. He did this for himself and his own selfish needs. One woman wasn't enough for him. Do you really want someone like this? Someone who purports to love you but will always put himself first, willing to lie his way through this? A cheater is broken inside. They look for external validation, to fill what's lacking inside of them. In doing this, it's a dysfunctional coping mechanism. When people do this, many never figure out how to feed from within, feed that low or no self-esteem. So your ex fed off you and the other girl. What kind of man is he? Not much of a man. Not someone who's worth hurting for or wanting.
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