lostinlove23 Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 My boyfriend of just about 6 months decides to tell me that he wants to take some sort of break. This happened about 3 weeks ago. In this conversation he told me that I was not losing him, that we would still talk and see each other, and that he just needed some time to figure some things out. He said that he is bitter and angry towards his last relationship and has been taking it out on me and treating me like crap. Once he gets past this we can be together and he will treat me how I deserve to be treated. He told me that he still loves me and wants to be with me. He wants me to be supportive and I am trying so hard but this is not what I want. As for the talking and seeing each other, it hasn't happened (at all). We work together so we do "see" each other at the office. But other than that nothing. A couple weeks ago I asked him if he still wanted to be with me and he said yes but that he needed to get past this first. He also said that he didn't know how long it would take, that I could see other people if I wanted and that he hoped I would still be there when he was ready. However, we don't talk. People are telling me to leave him alone. To stop texting and trying to talk to him. Absence makes the heart grow fonder apparently. So, taking this advice I haven't text him since last Wednesday and we have not spoken since last Thursday. This is killing me. I don't know what he wants and what I'm supposed to do or think. Today he didn't say 1 word to me. It was basically like I didn't exist. It was awful and it only makes me feel worse. He has never lied and I do trust him so I want to believe that when he tells me he still wants me but it's getting harder to. I don't know what to do... Does anybody have any advice for we?? I'm told to leave him alone and he will come to me. What should I do???
citizen67 Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 I think you should treat this like you are broken up 100%. It is mean that he is basically ignoring you. You deserve better. Try to move one, and then, if he comes back and says "oh I am ready now" maybe you can say "oh too little too late" - otherwise, if you just wait it out and he comes back and you are like "oh yeah I am so happy to have you back" he learns that you will accept such treatment. You need to take some responsibility for how you are willing to be treated - do not be the doormat here
HappyAgain Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 Why did he jump into another relationship with you so quickly before he healed from the previous one? Honestly, like citizen67 said, treat this like a breakup. If you were a rebound, he may never come back as you served your purpose in his life. And if he does come back do you want to appear like a doormat that has been sitting around and waiting for him to make up his mind? He'll never treat you with any respect after that.
Lippy2 Posted March 3, 2009 Posted March 3, 2009 I know it's hard. My boyfriend just did something very very similar. Don't contact him in anyway shape or form. I know it hurts, it's breaking my heart. I so badly at times want to pick up the phone but remind myself that if he really wants to talk with me or anything, that he would call. He knows how I feel and it sounds like your guy does too. (Mine was a 5 year relationship) Do you work in a small office? Is there anyway for you not to see him at work? How old is he? Stay Strong!!
LoveUrselfFirst Posted March 3, 2009 Posted March 3, 2009 You already know in your mind to just leave him alone at this point. It's not fair that he wants a break because of his past relationship because he should have never jumped into a relationship with you if that is what his excuse is. Delete his number from your phone and avoid his texts. You can still be cordial with him at work because unfortunately you work with one another, but it's time for you to move on. If he approaches you and asks you what's wrong or try to give you the puppy dog eyes, just be that strong-willed female that you are and smile and say everything is fine.
IcemanJB Posted March 3, 2009 Posted March 3, 2009 I'm sorry to hear this. What others have said is right on. I'm going to be straight up honest with you, because, well, that's what I do on LS. If you want ANY shot at getting back with him, you need to act like he doesn't exist. Chances are, he doesn't see things progressing with you in the future, and he's seeing what else is out there. He might actually have some baggage from the previous relationship, but there's also the chance that he's just using that as an excuse. In either case, LEAVE HIM ALONE. The ball is in his court. Only take him back if he pretty much begs for it.
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