atl03 Posted October 6, 2003 Posted October 6, 2003 My girlfriend broke up with me about a week ago. We had been having some problems for a few weeks, and I believe the were mainly due to stress related to my job and a few other outside situations. Unfortunately I let these outside situations affect the way I acted around her and treated her. We were on the verge of breaking up and decided to take a weekend trip away together to see if we could work things out. The weekend was great and things seemed like they were back on track. However the next time we were together after that we went to dinner and things seemed a little "off" and awkward and she ended up breaking up with me by the end of the night. She says she still loves me and misses me but that things just aren't the same. To futher complicate the matter she has self esteem problems. I feel like the problems we had were predominantly due to the outside stress I was going through and all those issues have since been resolved. I have admitted my mistake in letting it affect us and am committed to not doing that again. I can't explain what happened the last time we were together - I have recognized a problem I have with anxiety, we have talked about it, and I am trying to work on it. I love her very much and she is also my best friend. I want to spend the rest of my life with her. She says that I am her best friend too. How do I convince her to give us another chance and work through our problems?
VASH THE STAMPEDE Posted October 6, 2003 Posted October 6, 2003 you can't convince any one,it has to be a matter of whether she believes,trust,and want to be with you. You have to prove your self to her and if she feels you're are truthful and sincere.she might just give you a chance.
shopgrl Posted October 16, 2003 Posted October 16, 2003 atl03- I've just gone through a similar situation. I'm not sure how old you are or how serious your relationship was but I am 25 and my ex is 33. I was with my ex for 2 1/2 years. OVer the past few months, I've noticed something wrong in our relationship. I was undergoing alot of stress due to a family illness, new house and so on and I too, know that it affected the way I treated my boyfriend. We also recently went on a vacation together and I hoped that would heal our troubles. The vacation was great, we were still talking about marriage, kids and so on but within a few weeks, we broke up mutually. His reasons were that I haven't been treating him the way he deserves and vice versa and that we had some unhappy times over the past few months. My reasons were basically the same. We talked about things, admitted our wrong doings and so fourth but decided not to reconcile, partially my decision but mostly his because if he would have been willing to compromise, I would have been too. He was my life, my everything. But now after thinking about it, I'm totally done with our relationship and moving on. You know, what I've come to is this--- every couple has problems, ever partner has times in their lives that are stressful which prevents them from being 100% and sometime even, so to say, neglecting thier partner. If one partner is not willing to stand by the other and work through these hard times then the relationship is not worth it. So, what, everytime you get stressed out and aren't 100% your girlfriend is going to walk away? Be thankful that you were not engaged or married to this girl. Who knows though, maybe this girl will come aroud and realize what you two had together and maybe it will work out. The only way you will know though is to give her time, set her free and let her miss you. If she doesn't come back or your paths don't cross again, I suggest to find someone who is willing to stand by your side no matter how rough the water gets. Really take this time to yourself and figure out what you want and need out of a relationship. What is true love and what does it mean to you? Maybe it's not necessarily your ex you miss but rather a relationship itself. Time will only tell and what's meant to be will happen. I know it's tough, trust me I'm going through the same thing. Sorry so long but I hope it helps.
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