rach23 Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 I hate the whole texting/flirting deal. I can't interpret texts whatsoever. I need a guy's perspective on this. Basically, I got set up with this guy and wasn't really into it(at first). I was probably a little stand offish, but I warmed up by the end. We went out with his friends to this bar downtown and had a bit to drink. Since I drank I accepted his offer to sleep at his place BUT I did noooothing. Not even kiss. I didn't know if it was the right thing to do even tho (a) I was a bit drunk (b) I kinda liked him and © I was in his bed. So I played it safed. I left early the next day before anyone woke up and apologized via text, but said I had a good time. A few days later he finally responds and says it's okay and that he had fun too and then something about hanging out again (with a winkie face mind you...I hate winkie faces) and to let him know if i'll be around next weekend. I said I would be around (with a forced smiley face reply). Mind you I was busy this weekend, which is good because it's Sunday night and I just realized he never called or texted! lame I admit I could've been a better date, but I wasn't bad! And hey I thought I looked pretty damn cute. My friends say to wait it out. I'm curious what you boys have to say. Is he just not that into me, should I be bold and text something or follow my friends advice and wait it out?
missdependant Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 Was this the first time you met him? If you slept in his bed, because you had a little bit too much to drink, and it was the first time you guys met, he may be questioning just how often you do this sort of thing (regardless of whether or not you did anything physical). I'd wait till later this week and just ask if he wants to get A drink with you.. if he doesn't respond, you'll know where he stands. If he does respond, perhaps he's playing the game that everyone likes to play when they first find someone of interest.
Author rach23 Posted March 2, 2009 Author Posted March 2, 2009 I think we are on the same wavelength! See, sleeping in his bed was noooot my intention...especially because it WAS the firs timewe met. But drinking and driving was out of the question. I didn't do anything bc I didn't want to send the wrong message. He basically led me to his room, gave me some PJS, and definitely signalled for me to sleep in the same bed. He's actually quite a nice guy. We talked and he was definitely facing my directiong for a while (good sign), but I just kinda stayed on my stomach and dug my face into my arms a bit. It just felt so weird to be there considering the circumstances. I think waiting it out is the best option. It's just annoying because I didn't dwell on it until I thought he might not be interested. I HATE that I'm like that...it almost feels instinctual!
bean1 Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 I don't really see anywhere that he would get the impression that you were interested either! If you slept in his bed but didn't do anything, slipped out in the morning, and have been corresponding via text! Despite what you said, I would interpret that as not interested (and honestly, from a guy's point of view, he may view that as a tease when sleeping in his bed). How old are you guys? I'm only 24 but I still would expect something scheduled via phone call and a dinner date as a "real date". Here's a test of a man's interest: only accept his phone calls. NO TEXTING!
Author rach23 Posted March 2, 2009 Author Posted March 2, 2009 Hi Bean- Thanks for the honesty. We are mid twenties. And actually it wasn't suppose to be a one on one date or a date at all for that matter. I'm new to the SF area with noo friends and he was being nice by taking me out with all his. I thought it was platonic until I starting getting a 'more than just friends' vibe. I can promise you I am no tease. I just feel like if I am to 'hook up' with someone, they should take me out on an actual date-date. And also I'd prefer not to be drunk. He really does seem like a good guy, and I don't think it was his intention to just get me in the sack. Under normal circumstances, there is no way I would be first to call or text (at least the first couple times). I just feel like I accidently sent the wrong signal, so I'm not sure if I should be the one to step it up. Do guys still go after a girl even if he's not sure if she's interested?
bean1 Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 I don't think you are a tease! I have done the same thing myself. From a man's point of view though, sleeping in his bed and facing you probably equals an invitation from sex. If you are seriously unsure, give him a phone call and ask him straight out if he is interested.
BobSacamento Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 I can't really tell if you care or not. Do you see yourself dating this guy again? If not why do you care whether he calls? Next time crash on the floor.
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