Tryng2Trust08 Posted March 1, 2009 Posted March 1, 2009 Im soo upset and angry, that my ex is deciding to tell me all these things now. How I pushed him away soo far, and he was working with me trying to make things work, but he couldnt take it anymore. And how he feels bad about how things turned out, but if I would have relaxed things would have been ok. He really thinks things would have been ok?? How he never walked away from me, and he was always there. I dont feel like he was always there, many nights I was left crying and upset, that is NOT normal! How about how he told me a few months into our relationship he was losing interest in me. Does he know how bad that hurt me and how insecure I felt in our relationship after that!? Maybe that was something that damaged our relationship? He doesnt get it. Why did I even let myself get into a conversation with him, it only makes me angry and upset, and hes not worth it to me anymore. I feel like I am back at the beginning, but I have noone to blame but myself.
messed-mind Posted March 1, 2009 Posted March 1, 2009 Sometimes people look back and twist their views and thoughts on a situation and use it against you in the present. It sounds like your relationship with him is dysfunctional on all levels and it would probably be best not having him in your life in any way at all. The relationship is over, analysing "ifs" and "maybes" isn't good for your mental health and could bread cynicism in you for future relationships.
Fiaman Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 Sometimes people look back and twist their views and thoughts on a situation and use it against you in the present. It sounds like your relationship with him is dysfunctional on all levels and it would probably be best not having him in your life in any way at all. The relationship is over, analysing "ifs" and "maybes" isn't good for your mental health and could bread cynicism in you for future relationships. Interesting... Could you please define cynicism (what you mean by bringing it in future relationships)
messed-mind Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 I think that by allowing an ex to affect you in such a way can cause you to build up dangerous baggage that could turn you into becoming a "man-hater" (or woman hater...!). I think it's healthy to spot when someone is just being plain obnoxious for the sake of it and get away from them to let you get on with your life for the better.
thegoodlife Posted March 2, 2009 Posted March 2, 2009 He is just trying to make you feel like the guilty one and make you feel like you're the only one to blame for the ending of this relationship. And he's trying to make himself look like the good guy who tried and tried but just couldn't make it work. It's bull. He's wrong and we both know it. Don't let him convince you of these things you know are not true. He just prefers to view himself as the guy who caught a tough break and place all the negativity on you so he can feel better about himself. Don't try to argue with him, just let him say whatever he wants to say. You just need to worry about yourself, and move on. You know what's true in your heart and that's all that matters.
Author Tryng2Trust08 Posted March 2, 2009 Author Posted March 2, 2009 Thanx...He has admitted he did many many things wrong. Now that things are clearer for me, I wanted him to admit we are not for each other, but he will not say it. We clashed big time and he says we went together fine. He wont agree with me, and that's perfectly fine. He tried, fine, whatever, I did,too. I put soo much time into him, Im a single mom, I go to school, like I have the time for his BS. I needed more from, him and he wouldnt give it to me, thats all there is to it. I am moving past him, its just not worth me being sad for one more day.
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