wav Posted February 28, 2009 Posted February 28, 2009 I ask this on behalf of my son, as I am not sure how to advise him on this. He teaches in a college in the midwest. One of his colleagues expressed the wish to sit in one of his classes for the next semester, reason being that mastering the subject will help him (the colleague) write some paper/book for publication. (The colleague's specialty is different from my son's, but they are in the same program.) The colleague half-jokingly asked for "permission". My son says that he would rather not have a fellow faculty member sit through every class for the entire semester, but he doesn't know how he could decline the colleague's request without harming their very amicable working relation. Any advice/suggestions?
quankanne Posted February 28, 2009 Posted February 28, 2009 is there another way your son could "teach" him or tutor him on the subject in his off time? Or even point him out to another teacher? I'm sure the other guy isn't looking at it as anything more than learning from a trusted source, though I can completely understand your son being uncomfortable in that position, and he's right to worry about how it'll work the friendship/work relatinship. tell your son to look for some alternative means of learning, then suggest them to the other guy. The key to getting out of a potentially unagreeable situation is to hype the other ways so much that you're automatically the last resort!
Geishawhelk Posted February 28, 2009 Posted February 28, 2009 I would suggest your son liase with the Dean or Head of the College to work out a reasonable timetable, because this would be all give and no take. He should run his concerns by the Head and discuss it so that there is no misunderstanding, mis-communication and everything is absolutely clear from the outset.
Author wav Posted February 28, 2009 Author Posted February 28, 2009 is there another way your son could "teach" him or tutor him on the subject in his off time? Or even point him out to another teacher? I'm sure the other guy isn't looking at it as anything more than learning from a trusted source, though I can completely understand your son being uncomfortable in that position, and he's right to worry about how it'll work the friendship/work relatinship. tell your son to look for some alternative means of learning, then suggest them to the other guy. The key to getting out of a potentially unagreeable situation is to hype the other ways so much that you're automatically the last resort! Thanks. But apparently sitting in my son's class would be the easiest way to learn to subject It seems my son shares the same office with this colleague. I would suggest your son liase with the Dean or Head of the College to work out a reasonable timetable, because this would be all give and no take. He should run his concerns by the Head and discuss it so that there is no misunderstanding, mis-communication and everything is absolutely clear from the outset. Thanks. I agree with you completely. Not being mean-minded, but why should a faculty member essentially take a course, free, with another, when all the students in the class pay tuition and do homework? Why not try to learn by yourself if you can teach in a college? But I must tell you this is not why my son does not like the idea. Rather, he just feels uncomfortable to be "observed" by a colleague on every class. They have the so called official peer observation once a semester or a year. I don't think he will want to talk to the dean or head of college about this .
Geishawhelk Posted February 28, 2009 Posted February 28, 2009 Ok, I hate to be a hard case, but your son is in charge of order and discipline in his class? he has to control students, is responsible for making sure his students concentrate, pay attention, do not divert the lesson from the focus of the subject....? Then if he has to do all this, he should be able to tell his colleague that he would prefer to have him sit in lessons maybe once every four weeks, or so. Just get your son to prepare a timetable of subject matter and when anything primary arises - and hand it to the other guy and say: "This is when I'd be happy for you to sit in with me. I look forward to seeing you on these dates." Smile, and walk off. Speaking your mind carries risks. 'You' (generic, not specific) have to evaluate which is more important to you: and when you have concluded that, you have to be able to stand by your principles. If the guy says: "hang on, I was hoping to be able to attend every lesson..." Your son would be entitled to explain that these students have to pay for theirs, and it would be unfair to give him what amounts to free tutoring, wouldn't he agree? Unless, of course, he'd like to contribute, then that would be up for discussion..... I'm sorry, but he has to learn to stand his ground, because if this guy gets away with it, your son will earn the reputation of being a soft touch....
Author wav Posted February 28, 2009 Author Posted February 28, 2009 Ok, I hate to be a hard case, but your son is in charge of order and discipline in his class? he has to control students, is responsible for making sure his students concentrate, pay attention, do not divert the lesson from the focus of the subject....? Then if he has to do all this, he should be able to tell his colleague that he would prefer to have him sit in lessons maybe once every four weeks, or so. Just get your son to prepare a timetable of subject matter and when anything primary arises - and hand it to the other guy and say: "This is when I'd be happy for you to sit in with me. I look forward to seeing you on these dates." Smile, and walk off. Speaking your mind carries risks. 'You' (generic, not specific) have to evaluate which is more important to you: and when you have concluded that, you have to be able to stand by your principles. If the guy says: "hang on, I was hoping to be able to attend every lesson..." Your son would be entitled to explain that these students have to pay for theirs, and it would be unfair to give him what amounts to free tutoring, wouldn't he agree? Unless, of course, he'd like to contribute, then that would be up for discussion..... I'm sorry, but he has to learn to stand his ground, because if this guy gets away with it, your son will earn the reputation of being a soft touch.... That's a good idea! I will pass it on to my son! I was just thinking, this is not just an all give and no take case, it even carries the risks: my son would have not only taught this guy for free, with all the extra discomfort, but also risk the possibility that some day the guy may tell others what he does *not* like about my son's teaching. Who says that can't happen? Any more comments/advice welcome! Keep in mind that according to my son, this is a very friendly colleague and they get along very well. It just seems the guy has not realized what he thinks a simple matter means differently to the other person.
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