Jump to content

Unexpected contact from ex. What does it mean?


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

My bf broke up with me 6 months ago because I did some really stupid/immature things, which included cheating. We dated for almost a year. I pleaded for him to stay at the time but he said he can’t get over the pain I put him through and he also can’t trust/respect me anymore because I lied/cheated. As much as it hurt, I went NC so I can move on.

 

We were NC for 6 months until recently out of the blue he sends me a casual email just asking how I’m doing. I was surprised he even sent that but I ignored it. Then a month later he sends me another email, which really surprised me as it was a somewhat heartfelt email, and sent after I ignored his first one. It was partly nostalgic, as he talked about how in love with me he recalled he was when we first started dating. He wondered if I had a new bf or if I was single. But I sensed some pain as well as he lightly touched on the past, wondering how it would be like if we had been together without those things happening.

 

I never expected him to send me this email because he seemed somewhat cold/numb when he broke up with me and also because he doesn’t normally remain in contact with exes (whether he was the dumper or the dumpee). He is not what would strike you as the codependent type. I’m surprised mostly because I would expect him to hate me forever. I was the worst gf, and hurt him repeatedly throughout the relationship. Why do you think he would contact me?

Posted
Why do you think he would contact me?

  1. he's going thru a dry spell, or
  2. he geniunely wants to know how you are

nothing more, nothing less. forget about the emails and live for teh future

  • Author
Posted
  1. he's going thru a dry spell, or
  2. he geniunely wants to know how you are

nothing more, nothing less. forget about the emails and live for teh future

 

Perhaps it is best to think this way and leave the past behind. Should I just ignore this email again?

Posted

This is a toughie. Congratulations on maintaining NC for as long as you have. If you respond, do so with no expectations that he wants to reconcile. He may just be wondering if you are okay and curious as to where you are in life.

×
×
  • Create New...