feelinglow Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 Or rather, she broke up with me. We'd been together 3 years, and she decided the relationship wasn't working and decided we should spend some time apart, during which time she decided to end it. In all fairness, the relationship probably wasn't working, due to various reasons I shant discuss here, but my current problem is that, before we started going out (When I was 16) I was basically just some loser that stayed home most the time and didn't really have a lot of friends and probably just spent most of my time on the internet. All od a sudden, she came along and it felt like total luck that I would find someone that I liked and that liked me and we did everything together. We did all our "first" stuff together, and we went places and we would always talk to each other and ring each other and text and everything. It just felt like it was one massive stroke of luck that this person came into my life. Of course, now I'm on my own again, and I can't help feeling like I'm probably going to be alone for the rest of my life now. I'm off to uni at the end of the year, and everybody tells me that things will be fine when I'm at uni and that I'll meet people and have fun, but nobody was interested 3 years ago and so why should they be now? Sure I've grown up and matured a lot in the last 3 years, but I just really can't see me being with anyone else. I used to probably sleep at her house 3 nights a week, and so now I find that I don't really know what to do with myself. There's so much time now that I didn't have before, and such an empty void. There's just so much going on in my head at the moment. I mean, I think I'm coping alright with the actual break-up, I've been seeing the friends I do have more and arranging stuff with people, but its just little thoughts like, I'll probably never hug another girl again. I'll never crawl into bed and fall asleep with her in my arms. It just feels like I've had my luck now, and that now I'm destined to be alone. I don't know why I'm posting this here. I don't know what I'm looking for. Comfort? Sympathy? Meh, I don't know. I suppose advice probably. Help. Yeah sorry for all the detached musings. Not making a lot of sense right now.
Goatsbreath Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 I'm off to uni at the end of the year, and everybody tells me that things will be fine when I'm at uni and that I'll meet people and have fun, but nobody was interested 3 years ago and so why should they be now? So your 19 now? Someone was interested 3 years ago and that's why you had a girlfriend for the last 3 years.....because someone was interested. You are so young, drop the nobody will want me attitude because that makes you look pathetic and weak. Give yourself a break and gain some confidence. Do this and I will bet 1 million dollars you will find another, that's how sure I am. take care man
Peter_pan Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 sorry man, similar story to mine, only she went off with the new guy within 3 weeks. i was crushed. but let me tell you, you will hug another girl lol and you will find another one. ive been single for over a year but theres no rush. and after your first year at uni you wont even look back. stay in there buddy
eclipseIDE Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 Or rather, she broke up with me. We'd been together 3 years, and she decided the relationship wasn't working and decided we should spend some time apart, during which time she decided to end it. In all fairness, the relationship probably wasn't working, due to various reasons I shant discuss here, but my current problem is that, before we started going out (When I was 16) I was basically just some loser that stayed home most the time and didn't really have a lot of friends and probably just spent most of my time on the internet. All od a sudden, she came along and it felt like total luck that I would find someone that I liked and that liked me and we did everything together. We did all our "first" stuff together, and we went places and we would always talk to each other and ring each other and text and everything. It just felt like it was one massive stroke of luck that this person came into my life. Of course, now I'm on my own again, and I can't help feeling like I'm probably going to be alone for the rest of my life now. I'm off to uni at the end of the year, and everybody tells me that things will be fine when I'm at uni and that I'll meet people and have fun, but nobody was interested 3 years ago and so why should they be now? Sure I've grown up and matured a lot in the last 3 years, but I just really can't see me being with anyone else. I used to probably sleep at her house 3 nights a week, and so now I find that I don't really know what to do with myself. There's so much time now that I didn't have before, and such an empty void. There's just so much going on in my head at the moment. I mean, I think I'm coping alright with the actual break-up, I've been seeing the friends I do have more and arranging stuff with people, but its just little thoughts like, I'll probably never hug another girl again. I'll never crawl into bed and fall asleep with her in my arms. It just feels like I've had my luck now, and that now I'm destined to be alone. I don't know why I'm posting this here. I don't know what I'm looking for. Comfort? Sympathy? Meh, I don't know. I suppose advice probably. Help. Yeah sorry for all the detached musings. Not making a lot of sense right now. Youre going to college and youre worried about meeting another woman? This is probably the dumbest thing I heard all day today (no offense)
Peter_pan Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 actually its not ^^ i went to uni and didnt ever meet another gf... fair enough i was there for a year and hung up on the ex probably didnt help
eclipseIDE Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 actually its not ^^ i went to uni and didnt ever meet another gf... fair enough i was there for a year and hung up on the ex probably didnt help This is probably why, seriously, Im no Brad Pitt but I went to visit a girl I was seeing at uni and I would literally have women hitting on me on the way to the shower!
Peter_pan Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 really? that sounds amazing lol sure you ent like a bodybuilder? which school was this?
eclipseIDE Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 really? that sounds amazing lol sure you ent like a bodybuilder? which school was this? nope, I was just a 155lb regular guy Michigan State
D-Lish Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 I went to college first and then on to uni... some of the best times of my life. I met so many people, boys included.... it was one big hormone party. You'll have a great time. First loves are the hardest to get over.... but you will get over her. I started college at 21, a little late. I had been with a bf for 3 years that was controlling and emotionally abusive- I broke up with him after being in school for one week. Uni will be good for you. Disregard what you think you were 3 years ago as opposed to now. You're not the same person. Believing yourself to be that same 16 year old that couldn't find a gf when you enter uni will only be a detriment to you. This is a chance to shape a new you, find out where you fit in, make some new friends- and have a whole lot of fun. You're not the same guy you were 3 years ago- you're just not. Keep telling yourself. Go into school with an open attitude about meeting new people. Relationships- even the ones that don't work out offer us opportunities to learn and grow. I am sure you have learned a lot and grown a lot in the last 3 years. When you're open to being social, it shows, and more often than not- people will come to you.
gr8lips Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 At 19, fresh at university you will find plenty of girls to fill that void hopefully. I know its difficult, but then since she has moved on, there is no point. And as you said there lots of other reasons. may be u had ur deifferences. Think about all those differences and those bad moments and it will help.
Chinook Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 heh A response I feel I can help with I'm a Uni lecturer. Recently I did an exercise in class with some first years. It was kinda like an anonymous chinese whispers thing. They had to write on paper why they were there (they're on a nursing course... so the course they are on is predominantly girls!) a few of the younger girls... guess their answers.... "the boys are hot" I kid you not. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry that day. So trust me, even if the girls on YOUR course don't find you interesting or what they want.... there are girls on other courses who will :D
12ape Posted February 25, 2009 Posted February 25, 2009 I'm in the same boat, but I met my girlfriend at 14 and we are almost 19. Dang, I really miss her.. I really thought she was the one, I was ready.
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