course Posted February 24, 2009 Posted February 24, 2009 My boyfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship for a year. I go to a school away from home while he commutes to school everyday. All of his friends left for school during the year, his mom is never home, and obviously I can't be there physically. He feels alone and depressed and blames the fact that he has no friends on me. He says he loves me but he is so unhappy with his life. He hates the way things are going for him right now and knows that if he breaks it off with me that he will feel even worse. I've tried suggesting activities to get into to keep his mind of things but he claims that by saying that, I don't understand. We both can't move at the moment because we are in school. I hate seeing him so unhappy, is there anyway to save my relationship?
Rollercoasterr Posted February 24, 2009 Posted February 24, 2009 First off, none of this is your fault. No matter what he tells you. He decided that you were worth a relationship, so he began one with you. It's HIS choice to stay in the house all the time and not make any friends. It sounds to me like he IS depressed, but he's focusing the blame on the wrong person. If he wants his life to get better he DOES have to get out into the world, start making friends, and make his life better. Blaming you isn't going to help his situation at all. It's just going to make you unhappy, and then the both of you will be down in the dumps. Dont you ever let him make you feel like you're not worth it. There are plenty of guys out there who will make you feel like you are.
Island Girl Posted February 24, 2009 Posted February 24, 2009 First off, none of this is your fault. No matter what he tells you. He decided that you were worth a relationship, so he began one with you. It's HIS choice to stay in the house all the time and not make any friends. It sounds to me like he IS depressed, but he's focusing the blame on the wrong person. If he wants his life to get better he DOES have to get out into the world, start making friends, and make his life better. Blaming you isn't going to help his situation at all. It's just going to make you unhappy, and then the both of you will be down in the dumps. Dont you ever let him make you feel like you're not worth it. There are plenty of guys out there who will make you feel like you are. EXACTLY. Tell him to quit playing the blame game because all that is doing is hurting the person who is standing by him and wants to be with him. Tell him you will not just be a punching bag because it isn't healthy for you first of all, it isn't healthy for him, and it will destroy the relationship. Tell him you'd rather walk than watch what you have together die a slow and systematic death.
Author course Posted February 24, 2009 Author Posted February 24, 2009 Thank you guys for the reply. I've tried my best to support him. I've told him that life changes and friends come and go. The best thing you can do is move your own life forward. Again thanks for the support guys, I really appreciate it.
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