Guitarist Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 Ok, so im really in love with my SO/Boyfriend. Like, head over heels cant stop thinking about him for even 1 second kind of love. But we have the distance, our parents get pissed off because of the phone bill & hes usually grounded for one reason or another, so he cant be online or anything. As of today, I havent talked to him for almost 2 1/2 weeks and its killing me. We're set to meet in Disneyland, CA in August, but if this keeps going on im going to go insane or something. My heart feels like its being pulled down, it feels empty when I dont talk to him for so long... We've been together for almost 7 months, and I really dont want to end this because when i DO talk to him, hes the sweetest, most caring and passionate guy I've ever talked to. I'm scared to let go of him because once hes gone, I'll have nothing to grip on to and I wont be able to say somebody loves and cares about me the way he does. I'm also scared to hurt him, he doesnt deserve to be hurt. I want to do whats best for me, but even if the right decision is to break up with him, I dont have a hint how to, since hes my first serious relationship. To be honest, I'm only 12 years old, and hes 15, but i!PLEASE!i dont tell me I'm too young, or its too much of an age difference... I hear that too much, and I have the maturity of a 15-16 year old... But should I break up with him? If so, how should I? I really dont want to hurt him, and I want to be able to move on if I break up with him! Please help me!! [if your just going to say something like: Break up with him! Your too young! He'll cheat!, then be quiet, I need real help... Please, somebody answer this with a heart... It'll be appreciated]
Throne Of Lies Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 Were you 11 when you got together? How old was he then?
Island Girl Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 Oh my. I know you are really feeling strong emotions right now. At your age these feelings are new and they can be confusing. You are young. There is no way around that fact. At 12 extremely rarely do we meet or find our life partner. It is not wise for you to put all of your hopes and dreams into this relationship. That doesn't mean you need to break up with him. But you need to keep the rest of your life and your world a priority. If he always in trouble for something that doesn't sound good. And who doesn't have free nationwide long distance on their phone now? I thought everyone had that. All in all he is 15 and having a rough go of it lately. His parents are finding things they are upset about - whatever those things are - and he needs to get himself together. In just a couple of years he should be going to college or getting a job to support himself and start living as an adult. He could mess his whole future up by getting into trouble from now on. Perhaps it would be best to cool things off and agree to talk via computer and if he keeps getting into trouble like now where you can't communicate for long periods of time then you should tell him he needs to focus on getting himself straightened out and therefore you can't be in a relationship with him. I hope you are explaining these things to your parents. They should know how deep things are at this point. You are only 12 years old and you seem to be further along as far as relationships than maybe you should be right now. I know you are going to hate that I am saying that but there are things that come along with relationships that you need a lot more life experience to be able to handle. I wish you well.
Author Guitarist Posted February 20, 2009 Author Posted February 20, 2009 I was 11 at the time and he was 14 Island Girl, I know I'm young, and I know its rare to find that one special person at my age, but its hard to not feel the way I feel in this relationship. The reason hes usually in trouble are because he doesnt always follow rules, and his parents are quite strict. But who doesnt break a rule every once in a while? He has a job, which he got in order to pay for a plane ticket to Disneyland, where we're supposed to meet this summer. My mom knows I have him as my boyfriend, and shes knows I love him a lot, shes says I love him too much sometimes. I agree with that, but I cant help what I feel. I dont hate what your saying, its quite helpful, actually. Thank you for your help
Nicodaemos Posted March 1, 2009 Posted March 1, 2009 Aye lass, you are quite young, so I understand why you feel the way you do. When things are new they can be overwhelming. Especially relationships. Who doesnt break a few rules now and then, you might be surprised to find out you can live a wonderful life, by the rules. Age is a thing with him too, the differnce in age isnt a big deal later in life, because both people usually are in similar situations, both working, maybe doing extra eduacation to further themselves for a better job. Right now, you havent even gotten into highschool. If things work for the best, and you are one of the luckiest people in the world to find the perfect one so soon, absolutely wonderful. BUT.... understand, and know, that it is extramely rare to start a relationship this early and have it last a long time. Keep your parents advised of how you feel. Especially if other things start to develop with you, or him. You may feel like they dont understand you, or it may be uncomfortable, but, its just as uncomfortable for them to watch you go through it. With the time you have to spend apart, use it to help you develop patience. Island Girl gives some wonderful advice, and she hasnt seen her man for one of the longest steches of time that I have heard on this site. I am in one ( i hope still) that there were times I couldnt get a hold of her for a month or longer. And when we did talk, it might have been for only an hour or two, then, another 3 weeks before ANY contact between us at all was made. just relax, being unable to get ahold of someone for a GOOD reason, work, school, no money, is not a reason to end something. But, if he is always in trouble, even with strict parents, then yes, he does need some adjusting, if not for you, or himself, but so he can get some good habits developed for the future. Just calm down is all. You havent even begun you life yet, so dont limit yourself so soon, always hold possibility with you, and besides, if he is so perfect, which he isnt, ( and i say that, cause if he was, he wouldnt be in so much trouble) then its worth it to wait a little bit. Hope things work out, one way or another for ya.
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