Scarlett513 Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 How many people can you date without being a total jerk? My situation is this: I met a guy about a month and a half ago through mutual friends and we started hanging out. We live sort of far apart and so things haven't progressed quicky, still casual, and only see each other maybe once a week or every other week. In the meantime, I met another two guys through an online dating site. Met one of them last week and have date #2 planned for this week (I like this one so far). First date with the other one planned for the weekend. In the meantime, a set up that I had agreed to awhile back just got set up, so the first date for that is next week. Also, there is another set up but nothing is definite at this point. Not sleeping with anyone.... I have no intention of dating all of these people (that is, if they even want to date me) simultaneously but I do want to see what I'm working with before I make any decisions. I'm feeling guilty because I normally am a one-at-a-time type of girl. Is this okay? When are you expected to "commit," and how long do I have to decide which one(s) to pursue? I can't keep up with all of this and I think I can only realistically time-wise date 2 people at once. I just want to make sure I'm doing the right thing. I'm sorry if this is rambling I'm just stressed out.
Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 Not everyone is going to agree with me but I feel when you're multi-dating, you should disclose this to everyone involved. This way they have the choice of wanting to date you or not, under those circumstances. Once they've got full knowledge, you can date as many as you want. Myself personally, my max for multi-dating in the past was two. I had to log information into my PDA, to make sure I didn't muddle silly things up.
gopher Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 The way your describing it sounds fine...I would just caution you that the more people you casually date, the easier it is to think the grass is greener. There will always be new guys emailing you and to email, and set dates up with. I guess it depends on how serious of a relationship you are looking for. I wish you the best.
chrislovestosurf Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 its fine until you start hooking up with one or more of them, then they ALL need to know. Can guarantee you though that you will probably lose all of them if they think youre messing with multiple people. Nothing is more of a turn off than a woman who messes around.
movingonandon Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 There is no problem, but also no reason to multi-date them all after you've had 1 date with each one of them. While 1 date is not enough to determine if you want to stick with somebody for possibly more, it's enough to compare the 3 of them and make a pick. Multi-dating on a ongoing basis, however would make you a ho in my eyes .
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