readabook2 Posted February 19, 2009 Posted February 19, 2009 So i started dating this younger guy, i know its bad im 22 and hes 18. but anyways we started hanging out like sneaking it because i was kinda not proud of dating someone so young. but i really like him. So we usually txt a lot not really talk on the phone. and we both live with our parents so its hard to get alone time. So he was a virgin when we started dating than about a couple months into it he wanted 2 lose it to me, so finally i gave in and it was awesome! so we would hook up when we could. than one day he wasnt paying that much attention to me and i thought was txting a girl so i got mad and txted him after and said i couldnt do it nemore and i was done! than i regreted it and we started talking again well txting and seeing each other every once and awhile. than i told him i wanted 2 get back with him and he said if i take you back how do i know u wont do that 2 me again! so everything was good until he kinda switched it up on me and i always had to be the one to txt first or ask 2 hang out! than i saw him at a party and i was soo drunk i was trying 2 get his attention by flirting with everyone else. i know in my drunk state it made sense. he told me he was hurt because of that and if i do that infront of him what do i do behind his back. But i really like him and just wanted him 2 chase me and want me back! i was hurt really bad in my past relationships and now im paranoid hes cheating on me! He is a big flirt also! I dont know if he was every interested or if he just liked me because i was older! I dont know what to think or do... I really want 2 be with him though! someone help! lol
carhill Posted February 19, 2009 Posted February 19, 2009 Show this post to your father... I know what I would tell you. If you want a grown-up adult relationship, stop texting and stop playing games and talk to him face to face in the real world, like when you took his virginity. You want him to like you? Act towards him like someone he would want to like and accept his response. If negative, respect that and learn from the experience and move on to other men and other relationships.
Dexter Morgan Posted February 19, 2009 Posted February 19, 2009 than i told him i wanted 2 get back with him and he said if i take you back how do i know u wont do that 2 me again! so everything was good until he kinda switched it up on me and i always had to be the one to txt first or ask 2 hang out! than i saw him at a party and i was soo drunk i was trying 2 get his attention by flirting with everyone else. Well gee, you ditched him, then he gave you a 2nd chance....and instead of walking up to him....you decide to flirt?? Big mistake. Any guy with any self-respect and integrity won't give a 2nd thought to a woman that does this. If I were him, and I saw you doing that, first thing I'd think is..."well...looks like she is into too many other guys and isn't that interested in me afterall"....and I'd move on. A woman flirting to make me jealous turns me off....not the other way around. i know in my drunk state it made sense. he told me he was hurt because of that and if i do that infront of him what do i do behind his back. He's right to say that. But i really like him and just wanted him 2 chase me and want me back! Uh, you are the one that broke up with him. Sounds like you want an ego feeding. another red flag this guy should be seeing. iI really want 2 be with him though! someone help! lol ya, quit playing games. he is 4 years younger than you, but I you hadn't of told us your ages, I'd swear you were the 18yo. Be with him, you want his attention....then walk up to him. don't play these games. Flirting does far more harm than good.
IrishCarBomb Posted February 19, 2009 Posted February 19, 2009 This has to be a troll. I wasn't sure at first, but with the name "readabook2", there is no doubt. So in response, he will only love you when you have proven your devotion to him. The best way to demonstrate this is to give up your financial resources to him. That's right, you should pay him to be your boyfriend. It will melt his heart, fill his wallet, and make him love you like a princess. If that doesn't work then dress up like his favorite Power Ranger. He's "so young" that he's bound to get his childhood love of Power Rangers confused with his budding sexual identity. It works like a young mens' catnip; they just go crazy for it. If both of those fail, just fake a pregnancy and tell him that if he doesn't become your boyfriend that you'll call the cops and file false rape charges. Nothing says "Love" quite like "I told the police you raped me". After his sodomy-filled prison sentence, he'll be desperate for any female attention to compensate for his experience. When that happens, you'll be right there! Ain't love grand?
Author readabook2 Posted February 19, 2009 Author Posted February 19, 2009 hey doesnt want to talk about it... he just pushes it aside! but do u think hes seeing someone else?? he hasnt asked me 2 come over in about a week! well since that happened at the party. how do i know if a guy is cheating??
Geishawhelk Posted February 19, 2009 Posted February 19, 2009 So i started dating this younger guy, i know its bad im 22 and hes 18. but anyways we started hanging out like sneaking it because i was kinda not proud of dating someone so young. but i really like him. So we usually txt a lot not really talk on the phone. and we both live with our parents so its hard to get alone time. So he was a virgin when we started dating than about a couple months into it he wanted 2 lose it to me, so finally i gave in and it was awesome! so we would hook up when we could. than one day he wasnt paying that much attention to me and i thought was txting a girl so i got mad and txted him after and said i couldnt do it nemore and i was done! than i regreted it and we started talking again well txting and seeing each other every once and awhile. than i told him i wanted 2 get back with him and he said if i take you back how do i know u wont do that 2 me again! so everything was good until he kinda switched it up on me and i always had to be the one to txt first or ask 2 hang out! than i saw him at a party and i was soo drunk i was trying 2 get his attention by flirting with everyone else. i know in my drunk state it made sense. he told me he was hurt because of that and if i do that infront of him what do i do behind his back. But i really like him and just wanted him 2 chase me and want me back! i was hurt really bad in my past relationships and now im paranoid hes cheating on me! He is a big flirt also! I dont know if he was every interested or if he just liked me because i was older! I dont know what to think or do... I really want 2 be with him though! someone help! lol There is no age difference here to speak of, at all. My partner is 5 years younger than I, (I am female) my grandparents had 11 years between them, (grandfather being the younger) and my parents have 11 years between them (mother being the younger). I'm sorry to say it, but by the way you write - and generally, it's not popular to read posts written largely in text-speak - you sound relatively immature. Too immature to date, really....."lol."
Author readabook2 Posted February 19, 2009 Author Posted February 19, 2009 Your are right! I probably shouldn't date and sorry about writing in text I'm so use to it. I just can't seem to trust guys. My first "love" cheated on me with five of my really good friends, well so I thought. So I don't know when it's just being paranoid about getting cheated on or if the signs are really there...
Author readabook2 Posted February 19, 2009 Author Posted February 19, 2009 what if he doesn't want to talk about it?
Geishawhelk Posted February 19, 2009 Posted February 19, 2009 Maybe if you behaved yourself a bit better, laid off the juice, and didn't try to play mind-games, it would be easier. The main reason people play mind-games is to get the upper hand. People want the upper hand, because they think that anything else means they'll be trodden on. It's "kill" or "be killed" as far as they're concerned, and they think it makes them look clever, but it doesn't. A relationship is not a competition. A relationship is not a "me first, I'm more important". A relationship is a meeting of hearts and minds. I think you need to re-evaluate what kind of a person you are, look at your own issues and deal with yourself. This isn't a criticism. But until we truly know, accept and like ourselves completely and unconditionally - how the hell can we expect anyone else to do so?
Dexter Morgan Posted February 19, 2009 Posted February 19, 2009 hey doesnt want to talk about it... he just pushes it aside! but do u think hes seeing someone else?? he hasnt asked me 2 come over in about a week! well since that happened at the party. how do i know if a guy is cheating?? What does it matter? You broke up with him just because of your "fear" that he is cheating with absolutely no proof. From what you have told us he has given you no reason to make you believe he is cheating. But again, what does it matter? you broke up with him, begged him back, rather than going up to him and talking to him you flirt with other guys, and expect HIM to chase you after YOU dumped him. If he hasn't called you, I'd say your behavior at the party put him off. How about you just move on?
amymarieca Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 This has to be a troll. I wasn't sure at first, but with the name "readabook2", there is no doubt. What on earth is a troll???
lord alfred douglas Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 In the parlance of the internet it's a small green man who lives under a bridge
carhill Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 And exist to rile up the citizenry. I first encountered them on Usenet back in the mid-90's. The wild west of the internet
Citizen Erased Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 And exist to rile up the citizenry. I first encountered them on Usenet back in the mid-90's. The wild west of the internet Hey, don't bring me into this. For the record I hope never to have to date an 18 year old boy again in my life. In reality they're about 14 intellectually and emotionally and tend to bring you down to that level with the drinking and the texting and the IMing and whatnot. Boring.
Author readabook2 Posted February 20, 2009 Author Posted February 20, 2009 Thank you everyone for your advice! I decided to talk to him and told him how sorry I was for playing all these mind games and that I have real issues with guys. He said he does still like me a lot but he fell back because I did hurt him. That's why he was acting so weird. I now know how childish I was being!!!! But we decided to take a break and step back and see how we feel after awhile. But I really hope it works out! If not its a BIG lesson I learned! Thank you all again!
Dexter Morgan Posted February 20, 2009 Posted February 20, 2009 Glad a lesson was learned. No more games. Say whats on your mind and instead of trying to get his attention, just go right up to him. don't expect him to chase you...thats not a healthy relationship...thats one where someone wants an ego feed. And an ego that needs to be fed is not good relationship criteria.
Author readabook2 Posted February 23, 2009 Author Posted February 23, 2009 So I'm still hung up on this guy! haha i know i know! so i told him that i think we shouldn't talk this weekend and think if he really wants to be with me. I told him i would wait for him because i really do still want to be with him. So i was doing really good staying busy and trying not to contact him! Than i saw him and his friends walking so i said yelled hi as me and my friend drove by. Than HE text me and said was that you? So we texted for about 30 min. while i was at the bar. Than all day saturday i did not contact him at all!! So sunday comes around and i texted him and said hope your weekend was good and just wanted to say hi. He responded right away. But my concern is what if im reading to into this... how do i know if he wants to get back with me or is just being nice?? Because he doesn't ever talk about what is going on or his feelings and i always have to guess or try to read him... and should i keep my distance for now?? What to do....
Geishawhelk Posted February 23, 2009 Posted February 23, 2009 Text him again: "Meet me for coffee, on ****day at *** o'clock. I'd love to talk. You free? If not, when?" Then when you see him - are sitting infront of him, talking, face-to-face - ask him if you and he could have a thing going..... Simple.
Author readabook2 Posted February 24, 2009 Author Posted February 24, 2009 Ok... How do you really know if a guy is interested or is just playing you? Plus there might be some history in the guy i am talking about... I would just like to know how guys between the ages of 18-25 are thinking, because sometimes the only guy i want is the only guy i can't have ... why is that? HELP lol:eek:
Geishawhelk Posted February 24, 2009 Posted February 24, 2009 You stop contacting him and ignore him completely. If he's interested, he'll notice you've gone strangely quiet and do some chasing. If he's NOT interested - it will all go deathly quiet. And either way, you'll know.
Author readabook2 Posted February 24, 2009 Author Posted February 24, 2009 that will really work?? so i got to stay strong and not contact him... but i work with him and i have to talk to him at work so how should i act?
Geishawhelk Posted February 24, 2009 Posted February 24, 2009 Cool, calm collected and aloof. You act dignified and be civil. He may well take a while to adjust, but if he laughs it off and doesn't bite, you know he's just not being stimulated by it. If he tries to come on to you and acts interested, maintain your posture and dignity. In other words? Be a lady.
Author readabook2 Posted February 25, 2009 Author Posted February 25, 2009 Okay, i will try this! thank you! i just wish i knew the key to guys! lol you think you know them one min. than the next they switch is up on you!! haha you guys are to confusing!
collegekid491 Posted February 26, 2009 Posted February 26, 2009 You know that he's probably bragging to his high school friends that he's banging a 22 y/o chick and got her wrapped around his finger, right? I mean... thats why I dated older girls in high school... :s
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