werty Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 am i right to ask for space from the girl i have done everything for her but only sees me and just wants me as a friend? i have been with her for almost a year. even though she said she can only offer friendship, i still stayed with her and do things together hoping she would someday learn to love. from time to time i opened up the topic if she will learn to love me, and when she said she cant, or just want to be friends, i would make it an issue so i can tell her i want to leave and ask her space. she would then do anything for me not to go. something like has been goin on. and when i ask why she doesnt let me go when she doesnt loves me she would said she cant. that there has been never a guy that has been this nice to her. that never has someone understood her. never she has sombody that has the same common interests as her. 2 weeks ako was the worst. wen i again, tried to tell her i want space for the reason she doesnt love me... she then said she loves me, but doesnt know how to show it. long story short, i knew she just used the LOVE coz it was the only last thing she can do because at that time i was really decided to cut things off with her. but i decided ride-on her LOVE even though it was a LIE. hoping she would change or something would change. i let things roll until Valentine's came. the next day we met and told her that i really want that space. it hurts me that i know u dont love me. she even gives a lot of reasons why i cant get a kiss from her lipz. she then admits that the love thing was a LIE. and from the day she said she loves, all she did to show that she loves me was a lie too. the HUG and kiss on cheeks. thats why she cant kiss me on the lips coz she cant do something to somebody who she only sees as a friend. because to her, she loves me nothing more than a friend. that night i was really trying to break things gently. but something she said made my blood boil. she said she will return the cellphone i lent her(this was 1 thing i kept trying to get when i tried to ask her to let me go) and told me she will return it coz she does want me to "HUNT" her. i mean, wat dah. after all i think i was just nothing to her. so i said. ok u ddnt love me. you dont even care. you only wanted the things i can give you(i spoiled her, u know) and you never want to be with me. i said d only reason why u dont want me to go is because i will get the cellphone and you will lose your friends,right? so keep it(in an semi-angry voice, and i broke both my sim-cards on my phone so i cant contact her) treat it as my last favor to you. at least u have a remembrance of who and what i was to you. she tried to give it back. followed me wen i walked. i stopped and told her. there is nothing else more to do. this is what u wanted, right. not me. so please just walk away. you already have what you wanted. she then walked away. i am really harsh, wen i get mad. since monday i never seen her. she blocked and deleted me from every list( YM, frendster etc). i sent 1 last message to her saying i never was anybody or somebody to you after all i did. and im not expecting anything more... now is this the right thing to do for me? to let her go? to tell her i need space? that if there was a reason you would stay, thats if she loves me or accepts me for who i am? i was hoping if were not together, she would realise what she will miss. but i dont think it will never happen. so im thinking this is the only way i would be free and have peace of mind. knowing the person i love will never love me the same way i do! any inputs is appreciated!
redmelon Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 If she doesn't love you, and has said that plainly, then your only recourse is it to move on, and remove her from your life so you can heal. It sounds like you were more than nice, more than attentive, and gave it a good bit of your time to have a chance to grow. It didn't work out, and you should stop wasting your time, life is too short. I think you know that it's time for you to move on and have some more respect for yourself. You sent your last email and said your peace, so it sounds like you are a person who needs to go NO CONTACT from now on. It will get better, and you will see that being in a situation like this is only keeping you from being open to opportunities to be with someone who will love you and appreciate you for WHO you are, not what you GIVE them.
Author werty Posted February 19, 2009 Author Posted February 19, 2009 thanks for the reply. i should have walked away the moment she said she cant love me more than friends. i thought staying friends with her would someday make her learn to love me. but instead i wasnt even treated as a real friend.i was just wanted for what i can give, and not for who i was. and was just taken for granted. i think i right in this analogy,that i was just nothing to her.maybe i did things before that she treasures much, but she hasnt done anything for me to be happy. luving me would, but even if appreciation of what i do for her is enough. knowing i exist in her life was enough.. but i was nothing more, not even near from what i said.
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