Author climbergirl Posted February 17, 2009 Author Posted February 17, 2009 I think it's odd that he would describe his weekend by saying "we spent the weekend drinking". That's alcohol abuse talk, IMO/IME. What, they didn't do anything else? Normal people say stuff like, we spent the weekend waterskiing or BBQing or gambling or whatever. They don't specifically mention the alcohol because it is not the primary objective. I understand your wariness - being a recovering alcoholic who is involved with another recovering alcoholic. I think what you have mentioned is what sparked my antennae. Now if this had been some 20 year old, I could understand. But these people are in their 40's. And to compound what you said, B_O, I just talked to one of Irishman's friends (the wife). We are talking about the coming weekend, and she says, ® "So, Climbergirl, what did you do over the weekend?" © "Oh, dinner and a movie...so Irishman was there with you guys? What did you guys do?" ® "We went to Benihana's and got totally hammered!" That's it. Nothing else. You know, I love that place and wanted to ask what she had, but I doubt she would even remember. I'm not even considering going...I'm smart enough now to put away the shovel.
Author climbergirl Posted February 17, 2009 Author Posted February 17, 2009 (What I do take offence at is the notion that this is because he is Irish...........) I apologize, I did not mean to offend you. You're right, it isn't an irish thing, but a group dynamic thing (meaning him and his friends).
openbook08 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 any of this sound familiar????? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSS919VVyY0&feature=related
Phoenix11 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 my ex (also Irish) liked the odd beer in the evening, watching TV or with dinner. But more often than not on nights out he was the designated driver, and didn't drink at all. All of the guys I know have a very responsible attitude to alcohol. We've all had our moments where we've had one or two too many, but otherwise, very healthy attitude. I do agree though that someone saying we spent the whole weekend drinking has the wrong attitude. maybe explore exactly what he meant by that? I don't think I'd like to be with someone who lives for the weekend, so they can spend it in a drunken haze, that is certainly wrong. (What I do take offence at is the notion that this is because he is Irish...........) My ex also has a very responsible attitude toward alcohol. He was never one to drink and drive. Ever so alert to hand the car keys over to someone else. As a matter of fact, he would usually drive to a location and I would drive us back. However, in the confines of his home he would drink from sun-up to sun-down. Never once being inebriated. Still able to converse intelligently, cook, clean whatever. The only affect his drinking had on him was, he became alittle more frisky:D I say all of this make the point...yes he drank a great deal, yes he happened to be Irish, but that doesn't equate to being a drunkard, passing out in the street, low life son-of-a-gun that can't hold a job, always looking for a brawl. I luv my ex, Irish, Bud bottles and all. He happened to be Phd and has a career that's well on point. Don't fall victim to sterotypes.
Tomcat33 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 Climbergirl you are right on questioning what you are questioning. Sorry some people are taking offense and too bad some people just want to hear the politically correct sanitzed version but the reality is, as a society and as a whole people in the UK tend to consume more alcohol on average than your typical North American. It's like taking offense because someone says that East Indian people eat more spicy food, or the French eat a lot of cheese. They do. Enough with all this political correctness nonsense. Sure there are exceptions to the rule and there are even people who don't touch a drop I am sure, but overall the culture is proned to heavy drinking. So your concern is valid. Look not only is the fact that he comes from a culture that is proned to consume more alcohol a valid point, he is already giving you insights into how he is with his mates on weekends "spent the weekend drinking" if that doesn't tell you how much he drinks not sure what does? How old is he? But not only that he also warned you "WE party" it could only mean one thing; they go hard so not for the weak of heart. NOW having said all that, and reading all the indicating factors it would be safe to assume he is a heavy drinker, or at least heavier than what you would prefer but really the only way you can see how true this is and if it gels with your lifestyle/expecations is to date him a few times. That's what I would do to be sure, especially if you really like him, it's not fair to only go by assumption. If you go out to see him for the weekend and they are going to party you will see him as he is, he won't hold back much if he parties hard and is around his other mates. Trust me on this, people who party hard don't hold back if they are around their friends.
Jenny123 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 Hi Climbergirl, I'm a Northern Irish lass, only drink on rare occasions of going out. Some men here do drink-think it's because that's the boy's bonding time!! Some don't drink at all. 60/40. I'd give him a chance first. Good traits of the Irish- Say it as it is!!, Generally hardworking & generally honest. Bad traits of the Irish man- Could be more romantic-lol!
not_a_happy_camper Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 ok climber girl, he's in his 40's so alarm bells are definitely ringing. I agree you are right to question this too. It sounds like you are on different wavelengths. If this is how he spends his weekends.............RUN! I had pictured someone much younger, early 20's from what you had said. he sounds immature.
openbook08 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 as a whole people in the UK tend to consume more alcohol on average than your typical North American. . i gotsta point it out, ireland is not part of the uk!!if thats what u meant! love the uk & the people , sexy! , but hate when people think its all one big country. todays geography lesson over. class dismissed. (sorry to go off point climbergirl - sent you a pm)
Tomcat33 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 i gotsta point it out, ireland is not part of the uk!!if thats what u meant! love the uk & the people , sexy! , but hate when people think its all one big country. todays geography lesson over. class dismissed. (sorry to go off point climbergirl - sent you a pm) Depends on if he is from Norther Ireland, then he is. I know I meant that whole region. Scotland England Ireland Wales Should have said that.
openbook08 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 you must write out 100 times : "Irish people are the sexiest in the world" then i will forgive you :laugh::laugh: now im off to drink all night... (translation - meet my friend for a lucozade in the pub...see?? had you going there for a minute!! dont take everything we say so literally, we are a nation of charmers alright&blaggarders chances are this guy is all talk the talk !!!!)
movingonandon Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 My Irish beau drank more beer/alcohol than any other guy I've dated. His day was not fullfilled unless he had a beer bottle in hand and another one chilled and ready to go in the fridge. I would not label him or Irish people in general as alcoholics. He just enjoyed his ale and had a high tolerance for it. Tis all. (this is not a response to this particular post, but also to many similar ones). Not to get all moralistic and joykill on your azz, but generally when the idea of partying and "just having a good time" is invoked, it is often forgotten that any regular consumption of more than 3 drinks on one occasion is indicative of possible current or almost certain future problem with alcohol. (Yes, developing a problem is ONLY conditional on how much and how often you drink...) There are way too many people who drink way too much under the guise of just having a good time... I've been down this road for many, many years, and the power of denial is astonishing. I think the OP is perfectly right to be concerned. But there is no need to involve national origin - just observe his behavior. if he has an issue with alcohol, it will become obvious prety quickly.
Tomcat33 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 you must write out 100 times : "Irish people are the sexiest in the world" then i will forgive you :laugh::laugh: now im off to drink all night... (translation - meet my friend for a lucozade in the pub...see?? had you going there for a minute!! dont take everything we say so literally, we are a nation of charmers alright&blaggarders chances are this guy is all talk the talk !!!!) I DO agree!! If you really want to punish me you should make me go out with an Irish guy, (I should mention I have a very strong magnetic pull towards Irish, Scottish, English and Welsh men.... so I don't know how much "punishment that would actually be) I will write it out 200 times, how's that? What is Lucozade, sounds like an ointment used to treat a rare skin rash!?!?
Author climbergirl Posted February 17, 2009 Author Posted February 17, 2009 any of this sound familiar????? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lSS919VVyY0&feature=related :lmao: Oh yes that sounds familiar as I could only understand every other word he said, too!:lmao: Eh, cute accent, tho.
Author climbergirl Posted February 17, 2009 Author Posted February 17, 2009 OpenBook...working on that PM...have some questions. But now have to find out what part of Ireland he's from.
Author climbergirl Posted February 17, 2009 Author Posted February 17, 2009 Donegal?? That's what he said...kinda too lazy to look it up on the map.
Phoenix11 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 (this is not a response to this particular post, but also to many similar ones). Not to get all moralistic and joykill on your azz, but generally when the idea of partying and "just having a good time" is invoked, it is often forgotten that any regular consumption of more than 3 drinks on one occasion is indicative of possible current or almost certain future problem with alcohol. (Yes, developing a problem is ONLY conditional on how much and how often you drink...) There are way too many people who drink way too much under the guise of just having a good time... I've been down this road for many, many years, and the power of denial is astonishing. I think the OP is perfectly right to be concerned. But there is no need to involve national origin - just observe his behavior. if he has an issue with alcohol, it will become obvious prety quickly. hey killjoy, this is the point I was trying to make!
openbook08 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 I What is Lucozade, sounds like an ointment used to treat a rare skin rash!?!? lucozade is like an energy drink!! we all drink it here if we're sick (as children this means tummy bugs, as adults after a night on the guinness!!!) 7 Drunken Nights - hope this helps climbergirl!! if you do meet him, he'll be highly impressed & downright confused you even know about this!! As I went home on Monday night as drunk as drunk could be I saw a horse outside the door where my old horse should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me Who owns that horse outside the door where my old horse should be? Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool, still you can not see That's a lovely sow that me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more But a saddle on a sow sure I never saw before And as I went home on Tuesday night as drunk as drunk could be I saw a coat behind the door where my old coat should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me Who owns that coat behind the door where my old coat should be Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool, still you can not see That's a woollen blanket that me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more But buttons in a blanket sure I never saw before And as I went home on Wednesday night as drunk as drunk could be I saw a pipe up on the chair where my old pipe should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me Who owns that pipe up on the chair where my old pipe should be Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool, still you can not see That's a lovely tin whistle that me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more But tobacco in a tin whistle sure I never saw before And as I went home on Thursday night as drunk as drunk could be I saw two boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me Who owns them boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool, still you can not see They're two lovely Geranium pots me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more But laces in Geranium pots I never saw before And as I went home on Friday night as drunk as drunk could be I saw a head upon the bed where my old head should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me Who owns that head upon the bed where my old head should be Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool, still you can not see That's a baby boy that me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more But a baby boy with his whiskers on sure I never saw before And as I went home on Saturday night as drunk as drunk could be I saw two hands upon her breasts where my old hands should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me Who owns them hands upon your breasts where my old hands should be Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool, still you can not see That's a lovely night gown that me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more But fingers in a night gown sure I never saw before As I went home on Sunday night as drunk as drunk could be I saw a thing in her thing where my old thing should be Well, I called me wife and I said to her: Will you kindly tell to me Who owns that thing in your thing where my old thing should be Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk you silly old fool, still you can not see That's a lovely tin whistle that me mother sent to me Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more But hair on a tin whistle sure I never saw before
openbook08 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 Donegal?? That's what he said...kinda too lazy to look it up on the map. Donegal!! dunny-gawl i LOVE it, youve got one sexy sexy accent date him for the accent!! its up the very north of ireland im jealous:sick:
not_a_happy_camper Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 ha ok, here I will contradict all I was saying earlier...............stereotyping!!!! I've been out in Donegal a lot. They like their drink! I think it's like, they're so far away from the rest of the country, that they stay in their donegal bubble and drink for the sake of drinking. Two of my best college friends are from Donegal. Even they have agreed with this statement. seriously sexy accent! and one of the most beautiful places in Ireland.
Author climbergirl Posted February 17, 2009 Author Posted February 17, 2009 Donegal!! dunny-gawl i LOVE it, youve got one sexy sexy accent date him for the accent!! its up the very north of ireland im jealous:sick: LOL Is that a good sick or bad sick? Seriously, what are the guys like up there? But along the theme of this thread, when I asked where in Ireland he said he's sending me a link to 'our pub in donegal' to my email addy. Thanks for the lyrics! Much more fun when I can juxtopose the lyrics beside the song! Nowwwww I get what they're saying.
Author climbergirl Posted February 17, 2009 Author Posted February 17, 2009 Retraction, I jumped to the wrong conclusion...I misinterpreted what he meant by 'our' thinking he meant as in 'the town pub' and apparently misinterpreted what he meant by 'pub'. How was I to know?? My apologies to Mr. Irishman.
vanilla87 Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 Its true and false your view about the whole irishmen thing. I'm irish myself and most of the guys I know in my family like to drink, alot. But thats also of their other heritages as well. I do know Russians drink more then anyone and then second is german, then irish, then italian, and lastly english. The irish are known for drinking whiskey and beer mostly. I also know Irish guys that don't like to drink period.
Blackberries Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 OK, I think it's time I defended my country. I am Irish. And I am as Irish as it gets- , I was born in Dublin and have lived there for the past 23 years- all my life. I am not an American whose great-grandfather's brother's wife was Irish and so they consider themselves "Irish". I will say that I have never in my life seen so many well dressed businessmen (sometimes with briefcases), passed out drunk in the afternoon. Sometimes even laying on the sidewalk. The locals didn't even seem to notice and would laugh it off . In 23 years, I have never seen this. For breakfast he would have a half a cup of coffee with a half cup of Bailey's Irish Creme, only to be chased by another bottle of Bud. That sounds like someone with an actual alcohol problem. Get this text from- "But I gotta warn ya WE party" WTF is he meaning?? Him and me or is this to imply a swinging thing? His accent throws me on what he means. But, whatever, it isn't looking too good. He told you they like to party...where the hell are you getting swinging from? Drinking is a huge part of irish culture for definite, but we are not a nation of alcoholics. I am jumping to our defense, because it simply isn't true. Completely true. And to compound what you said, B_O, I just talked to one of Irishman's friends (the wife). We are talking about the coming weekend, and she says, ® "So, Climbergirl, what did you do over the weekend?" © "Oh, dinner and a movie...so Irishman was there with you guys? What did you guys do?" ® "We went to Benihana's and got totally hammered!" That's it. Nothing else. You know, I love that place and wanted to ask what she had, but I doubt she would even remember. I'm not even considering going...I'm smart enough now to put away the shovel. You know, I hate to say it, but you're probably better off not going, because you don't sound like much fun, and seem to look down on people who enjoy having a few drinks with their friends. Lighten up! as a whole people in the UK tend to consume more alcohol on average than your typical North American. The Republic (which includes Donegal) is not in the UK. I have to say, in general, I find Americans to be very conservative when it comes to drinking. Most nights when I go out, I'll only have maybe 4 drinks. This is maybe once a week. Sometimes I'll go on a mad one and have 8 or 9 and get hammered- so what? There's a huge difference between someone who has a few drinks socially with their friends at the weekend (and actually talks about it afterwards- shock horror!) and someone who drinks whiskey first thing in the morning and spends all day every day wasted. You may as well be comparing someone on a diet to someone with a serious eating disorder.
Tomcat33 Posted February 18, 2009 Posted February 18, 2009 vanilla87Its true and false your view about the whole irishmen thing. I'm irish myself and most of the guys I know in my family like to drink, alot. But thats also of their other heritages as well. I do know Russians drink more then anyone and then second is german, then irish, then italian, and lastly english. The irish are known for drinking whiskey and beer mostly. I also know Irish guys that don't like to drink period. If most of the Irish men you know drink alot that would support that Irish men drink a lot. Not that it is true AND false. not sure what the Russian and other references was supposed to prove because we are not comparing it to other nations or people who drink more we are only comparing it to North American's because the woman posting this thread/concern is North American and by North American standards, the Irish culturally do drink more. Of course there are exceptions, there always are. The Republic (which includes Donegal) is not in the UK. I have to say, in general, I find Americans to be very conservative when it comes to drinking. Most nights when I go out, I'll only have maybe 4 drinks. This is maybe once a week. Sometimes I'll go on a mad one and have 8 or 9 and get hammered- so what? There's a huge difference between someone who has a few drinks socially with their friends at the weekend (and actually talks about it afterwards- shock horror!) and someone who drinks whiskey first thing in the morning and spends all day every day wasted. You may as well be comparing someone on a diet to someone with a serious eating disorder. I know, I explained that already. Having "a few drinks socially" is often used to describe binge drinking which is often more dangerous than drinking every day. But because people don't wake up with a scotch in their hand every morning it seems to be fine. It's not. Binge drinking is just as bad.
not_a_happy_camper Posted February 19, 2009 Posted February 19, 2009 I have to say, in general, I find Americans to be very conservative when it comes to drinking. Most nights when I go out, I'll only have maybe 4 drinks. This is maybe once a week. Sometimes I'll go on a mad one and have 8 or 9 and get hammered- so what? There's a huge difference between someone who has a few drinks socially with their friends at the weekend (and actually talks about it afterwards- shock horror!) and someone who drinks whiskey first thing in the morning and spends all day every day wasted. You may as well be comparing someone on a diet to someone with a serious eating disorder. OK Blackberries, I agree with much of what you've said. And that last part illustrates a very important point. Massive difference between a few social drinks at the weekend, and having a liquid breakfast! What about people who go out with the sole purpose of getting wasted though? I'd have kinda picked that impression up from the text OP got "must warn you, we like to party"? I'd have picked up "I know I'll be getting hammered, and I won't apologise for it". which might be fine for some, but I wouldn't find that impressive! I don't mind going out, seeing how the night goes and having a few too many, but I don't agree with planned wastedness
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