Knight_Ctrl Posted February 16, 2009 Posted February 16, 2009 Alright its been almost 4 months since my breakup. Been through the ropes on this one, depression, crying constantly and all that. Slowly in the last month though I've become just angry over what had happened. I mean, she dated my friend while still with me! Strung me along for a month while we were still "together" so she could spend time with this "Friend" of mine, and then in the end dumped me. All while saying "I hope we can be friends, please don't hate me. She even turned it around on me and said "you always told me you wanted me to be happy." Yeah ok, good excuse to be a selfish bitch. Anyway. As some of you may know I broke my ankle in early December which was the worst. Aside from the pain in the ass it is it kept me from working out (I had lost 25 lbs before I got hurt! Damn the luck). And of course it kept me from being able to go out. All I did was sit around and stew. Miss her, yes....obviously. But am I capable of forgiving her? Never. I've been in NC and although she managed to break it I promptly ignored her and went back to it. I've been making slow progress with this girl I work with who is fantastic. I'm really starting to get feelings for her. She isn't ready for a relationship right now (I think shes going through some post breakup **** as well) but for now were just great friends, flirt alot, and I think when we finally do get together its going to be great. It sounds like were both looking for the same thing. I saw my......no....the ex, she doesn't deserve to be "my" anything. I saw her going to a (now exfriend). Of mines house. <---bad grammar? lol. Anyway. I was at a gas station on my break from work his house is accross the street. Of course we somehow (funny how the universe works) managed to show up at our seperate yet near locations at the same time. I don't know if she saw me, but I saw her......and I have to say.......even though I HATE to admit it......it still hurt... I was so sure I was almost over her, I mean my opinon on her is the same as its been. But it still hurt to see her. I can only hope I never do again.....I need to get out of this small town and away from her and this "friend" of mine. Lord knows what I'll do to him when I see him. And I still have to go to my sisters graduation, I know both the ex and my old friend (her new man) will be there.........****. There is light at the end of the tunnel though. I don't cry anymore, my ankle isn't broken and today I've just started my diet/workout regime again. I still enjoy my booze way to much (**** it) and I still play around with painkillers more than I should. But sat. I poped a few vicodin and went to a strip club with a female friend of mine (her idea even lol). It was a pretty ok valentines day, thought about the ex minimally. I don't really know what I'm doing anymore, kinda feel like Im just drifting day by day....wake up, work, play video games. Rinse repete.
Ronni_W Posted February 16, 2009 Posted February 16, 2009 Hugs, K_C. Probably will take a few to get back into full routine, now that your ankle is healed. Booze is a bitch on metabolism -- drink only so much as it doesn't blow your efforts and rewards from your workout and diet . Wishing you better and brighter days ahead.
BCCA Posted February 16, 2009 Posted February 16, 2009 I hope we can be friends, please don't hate me. Trust me, the last part is the only portion of this sentence thats true. She really doesnt want to be 'friends', she just wants to know you dont hate her. I really dont understand people at all. I'm just past 6 months out of my 5 year relationship, and truth be told, I still dont feel like its been long enough. I still feel pretty terrible about things sometimes, and I still dont feel like I'm 100% myself. My only advice is to take things one day at a time. Yes, there will be days where everything sucks, and thats ok. Some days, things will seem like youre feeling better, though, and eventually the good days will outnumber the bad ones. You will have relapses and you will break down sometimes, everyone does, but just do what you can to keep your feet moving, and everything will be ok. If there is anyway you can skip this graduation so that you wont run into your ex, I would. I honestly skipped christmas with my family this year because my ex's family lives a few doors down, and it was just too much. Believe it or not, people do understand. You really just need as much time and space from her as possible, and the fact that you know youre going to see her makes things that much harder. Hang in there. Time really does heal all wounds, but it can take a long time.
DSM-IV Tom Posted February 16, 2009 Posted February 16, 2009 Where do you live knight? If I ever drop by your town we'll knock that dude out lmao. Or at least egg his house. And his car. The egg will strip away the paint in his car. Yes, everyone, I AM mature, thank you all for noticing As for you BCCA... it will be a good year+ before you are over your relationship. They say it takes half the time you're together, to get over someone. I'm saying it'll take a bit less. Round a year and a half.
Joker77 Posted February 17, 2009 Posted February 17, 2009 Knight, I feel for ya man. I was there not too long ago. I basically just have broken my thought pattern about my ex. I took her off the pedistal I should have never put her on in the first place. She was a flake from the get go but I just didn't know it until the break up. I suggest you do the same thing. Take her off the pedistal and break your thought pattern. It really works...trust me.
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