sand26 Posted February 16, 2009 Posted February 16, 2009 I do. It has allowed me to make this observation. When a woman I am copulating with wants to woo me into a relationship, she will exaggerate my sexual ability. I don't even think it is an entirely conscience act, another animal mating instinct. And the little wooing trick works too. I always know my friends are whooped when they come to me with that goofy prideful smile, and in hushed conspiratorial tones, say, "Dude. She says that no one has ever made her so sexually fulfilled" It makes them feel all powerful...numero uno, like a king. I mean. It feels good to hear that stuff. I like it. But I don't buy it. So, men of loveshack....Do your wives or girlfriends tell you that you blow their mind like no one has? Did they in the beginning? Did other girls in the past? Did you believe them? And women of loveshack...Do you fib a bit to let your man feel awesome? Do you exaggerate to woo them into monogamy? Or am I just finding patterns that don't exist? Just wondering, because all of my guy friends think they are the best lovers their mates have ever had. And every gf I have had has proclaimed the same of me (and this is surely not true). We are average joe's not don juans. Thanks for reading this novel of a post. There is no reward for finishing, sorry. the mfk
Island Girl Posted February 16, 2009 Posted February 16, 2009 And women of loveshack...Do you fib a bit to let your man feel awesome? I have in the past and now I regret it because my husband IS the best and truly does blow my mind -- and the words just sound hollow when they come out of my mouth. I hope they still convey the truth to him. Do you exaggerate to woo them into monogamy? No. I have never had to "woo them into monogamy". I guess I have just been one of the lucky ones that the men I date just automatically want monogamy.
chrislovestosurf Posted February 16, 2009 Posted February 16, 2009 ive heard it before from women but you can also tell that a woman enjoys sex with you. Its never seemed like it was done so to get me to commit though. Ive also heard that Im too... eh hem.. large. Which kind of bothers me.
SoulSearch_CO Posted February 16, 2009 Posted February 16, 2009 ive heard it before from women but you can also tell that a woman enjoys sex with you. Its never seemed like it was done so to get me to commit though. Ive also heard that Im too... eh hem.. large. Which kind of bothers me. Hrm. You know, I've run into both ends of the spectrum. But quite honestly, size is not what's important. I'm being drop-dead serious. Generally the ones that had the size thing going for them had no skills to speak of because they figured showing up was enough. Focus on her (women take much longer to warm up than men), make sure she comes first (will make her much more "accepting" to your SIZE). Female orgasm prepares her to be entered. But anyway - no, have not used the line about somebody being the best in bed to get them to commit. Honestly, I'm trying to decide out of the 6 I've been with who was the "best." And really, I think they were all just "different." Hard to say if there was a best. But my current beau is with me now and makes me very happy in that department whereas the others are long gone. So maybe that makes him the best. LOL I really do think that women use that line to inflate a man's ego. Are you kidding? Is that not something that men love to hear? I'm not given to empty praise - I'm honest with my partners. But I would imagine some women do this. Just not me.
Author sand26 Posted November 10, 2010 Author Posted November 10, 2010 Still happening. This phenomenon persists in my life. Maybe when we have sex it always seems like the best??? I mean. It doesn't for me.... Do women usually stroke the man's ego in this way in order to woo him? Men: does it work? so i bumped my own thread,,,,,
Tim The Enchanter Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I've never had a woman say that I'm the best, but I tend to know when I've done my job correctly. I've only failed to make one woman orgasm, as far as I know, and she was one of those weird types that can only come through masturbation.
Titania22 Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 and she was one of those weird types that can only come through masturbation. Hey, don't be so mean. This applies to the majority of women.
Untouchable_Fire Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Hey, don't be so mean. This applies to the majority of women. Masturbation implies no partner. Manual Stimulation can be performed by a pair... which is what I think you are referencing. I've run into a few women that couldn't get the O through intercourse.
Tim The Enchanter Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Hey, don't be so mean. This applies to the majority of women. She was my ninth sexual partner and the first to be like that. Maybe I've been lucky? I don't know. Usually I know "what to do" to get a woman off, but she was hard work. The first time I ever went down on her she almost came, but I had to stop because I was getting jawache.
Mutant Debutante Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I don't emotionally start to fall for a guy to a point where I want to commit to him unless I click with him physically, and then most of the detailed memories of guys/sex from my past get fuzzy and go away. The guy I am into will outshine them all because my focus is on him, and I am with him in the first place because I want to be with him and I am attracted to him. It's a big feedback loop of warm and fuzzy emotion, it's not like a manipulative scheme.
USCGAviator Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I'm not packing a huge member so the act of sex isn't my priority. instead I focus more on connecting with them creating intense foreplay before actual intercourse.
LittleTiger Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 No, I have never told a guy he was the best unless he was. It's easy enough to be very complimentary without having to lie. The man I have now really IS the best - by miles - and he is in no doubt of it.
Titania22 Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Masturbation implies no partner. Manual Stimulation can be performed by a pair... which is what I think you are referencing. I've run into a few women that couldn't get the O through intercourse. Ok i get it now
Titania22 Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 then most of the detailed memories of guys/sex from my past get fuzzy and go away. This happens to me too, that's why i didn't have any scary dating stories, i forgot everything from before my last boyfriend, except for a couple of vague recollections it's all gone.
denise_xo Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 And women of loveshack...Do you fib a bit to let your man feel awesome? Do you exaggerate to woo them into monogamy? Or am I just finding patterns that don't exist? No, I wouldn't lie, and when I'm with someone I don't really think in terms of ranking/ comparative perspectives. So, I'd say something like 'it's really amazing to make love to you' rather than a sentence that would express how I rate my partner in relation to previous partners. It has never occurred to me to throw those lines to encourage monogamy
Lakeside_runner Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 I suck in bed. Ummm... "That's what she said"?
Mme. Chaucer Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 How do you know you suck in bed? When their flattery works to "woo you into monogamy," how does your sex life go from there? Personally, I wouldn't lie like that ... and a guy who "sucks in bed" would not interest me as a long term partner, either. The sexual rapport in a relationship is very important to me.
Art_Critic Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 And women of loveshack...Do you fib a bit to let your man feel awesome? Do you exaggerate to woo them into monogamy? Or am I just finding patterns that don't exist? I don't think women pumping up their men's ego's and making him feel good constitutes a lie... When a person asks "Good Morning.. How are you doing?" do you blurt out.. "I'm effing having the worst day of my life and I wish I had a gun to commit suicide" No.... You say.. " Just Fine" Same thing.. at least in my eyes...
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 As far as previous relationships are concerned, I don't know if I've gone so far to say "you're the best I've ever had," when I was actually unsatisfied or just "eh" about the sex. I have responded "yes" to the question "was it good for you?" and not really meant it. When I tell current BF that he's the best lover I've ever had, I MEAN it.
Mme. Chaucer Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Sometimes behaving with lustful enthusiasm in bed helps to INSPIRE the other person to reach higher ... and not suck in bed.
JamesM Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 First, I am curious why you "know" you suck in bed? Second, I know that I am not experienced in bed like many men. What I do know is....you only have to be as good as your SO/gf/wife needs you to be. If you can please the woman you are with, then you are king. If you assume that every woman you are with is lying, then you will never learn. One of the problems many couple face is how to be honest with each other and say if the other is good or bad. Just because 99% of the women think I am great in bed (hypothetically speaking )...this does not mean I will be satisfying to the one who really matters. The most important thing is to please the one you love. Do women lie? Probably. Why? Because many men cannot handle hearing that they are less than "the best." Yet if they heard the truth, then they could actually improve and be much better skilled. Men and women manipulate each other to get what each wants. This is a fact.
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 Do women lie? Probably. Why? Because many men cannot handle hearing that they are less than "the best." Yet if they heard the truth, then they could actually improve and be much better skilled. This is very true. In one of my past LTR's the sex life was pretty lackluster, but when he would ask me if I came, if I said "no," I was in for hours of him being depressed, self-loathing, and questioning my attraction to him. I've tried not to do that in my current relationship. Even though our sex life is great, once in a blue moon an orgasm just is not in the cards for me. If he asks me at the end, "did you get to come?" I say "no, but it felt really good." If he gets the pouty-face at my answer, I say, "look, I want to be able to be honest with you. I still enjoyed it and there was nothing I would have had you do differently."
Eeyore79 Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 If someone you love asks you if they're the best you ever had, "yes" is the only acceptable answer. Any other answer will make them feel bad and will negatively impact your relationship. I won't lie and say I had an orgasm if I didn't, because if I lie about that he's never going to get the hang of actually giving me one. But there's no harm in saying he's the best even if he's not, just to keep the peace. She was my ninth sexual partner and the first to be like that. Have you ever considered that perhaps she's the only one who didn't fake it? It really annoys me that so many women fake it, because I end up with a guy who sucks in bed but thinks he's god's gift to women because all his exes faked it. Then when I try to nudge him gently in the right direction, he insists that what he's doing is fine because it made all his exes orgasm. I very much doubt if it did
LittleTiger Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 First, I am curious why you "know" you suck in bed? Second, I know that I am not experienced in bed like many men. What I do know is....you only have to be as good as your SO/gf/wife needs you to be. If you can please the woman you are with, then you are king. If you assume that every woman you are with is lying, then you will never learn. One of the problems many couple face is how to be honest with each other and say if the other is good or bad. Just because 99% of the women think I am great in bed (hypothetically speaking )...this does not mean I will be satisfying to the one who really matters. The most important thing is to please the one you love. Do women lie? Probably. Why? Because many men cannot handle hearing that they are less than "the best." Yet if they heard the truth, then they could actually improve and be much better skilled. Men and women manipulate each other to get what each wants. This is a fact. These two statements are SO true. My man is definitely the best FOR ME. Who knows, or cares, what other women have thought about him in the past (I know what he's told me they said of course but they could have been lying ). All I know is that he is absolutely exceptional at making me feel good. Nobody else has ever come close. I can't see the benefit in lying either, especially to try to hang on to a guy. Why would you want to hang on to someone who 'sucks in bed' and, if he's so great in every other way, wouldn't you want him to know that he's not quite doing it for you and something needs to change?
Feelin Frisky Posted November 10, 2010 Posted November 10, 2010 No, I wouldn't lie, and when I'm with someone I don't really think in terms of ranking/ comparative perspectives. So, I'd say something like 'it's really amazing to make love to you' rather than a sentence that would express how I rate my partner in relation to previous partners. It has never occurred to me to throw those lines to encourage monogamy You took the thought right out of my head, sweetness. I haven't been told I'm the "best"--but, perhaps that is a matter of consideration and deliberation on the part of my SOs to not make it sound like they have had loads of other dudes of which I'm just the latest. I'm thankful NOT to have heard any such thing. Sincerity is perhaps something that can be faked for a while but it is also something one can see through pretty soon if he's wise. My best relationships gave me plenty of feedback that I was what did it for them. I don't need to be ranked compared to George, Paul or Frank et al.
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