jenxbunnyx05 Posted February 14, 2009 Posted February 14, 2009 okay so i kinda have a problem and i would love for anyone and everyones advice...good or bad...its very much appreciated! its somewhat in detail...its gonna be long so sorry! i dated this guy (bryant) from work for about 4 months...and in meeting him...i met alot of new people...all of his friends have known each other since high school... him and i stopped dating and just became friends...well through meeting all these new people i had met someone else (stephen)...and i am absolutely smitten over this guy...hes caring...he opens the door for me...kisses my forehead...always happy...very positive...just the perfect guy...anyway there is one huge problem! his SISTER... =[ at the time i was dating bryant he had introduced me to this girl...(at the time i had no idea that this was stephens sister, i didnt even know who stephen was)...she just looked at me and said nothing...not even a smile...so to be honest after that i was afraid of her...and just never even tried talking to her...i didnt even bother to look at her...she was just so rude and it seemed as if she didnt want to let any new girls into the group... well later on...as i was getting to know stephen...i eventually found out that the girl was his sister...her name is lee... i have never been invovled in drama...i stay away from it...but when i met these new girls...i really liked them but for some reason the drama was me... on halloween, i was talking to one of the girls ex bfs...him and i actually never got along...but that night we were just hanging out having a good time...well i guess this pissed off the ex gf and she started to hate me...and because she hated me all her friends hated me...theeennn...when this other girl sarah found out about me and stephen...she flipped out and started talking **** about me...i later found out she had like a major crush on him...but i had no idea! so that started rumors... these girls just simply hated me...but none of it seems to bother stephen...he says that im awesome and never lets the things they say hurt the relationship we have...lee will try to tell him im not good for him...im not a good girl...he needs to find someone else... okay...she doesnt even know me...her and i have never even had a conversation before...but she absolutely hates me...and i dont undertsnad it... he never brings me around the house when shes there...and i understand he doesnt want any confrontation...but what happens when we all get together like family stuff...i think that he will not invite me because of her...he says thats just how she is...and i had asked bryant why she is like that and he too says the same thing...thats just how she is...shes always been like that with girls...except for the girls shes known since hs... why is she this way? should i say something to her? if stephen and i decide to become serious...what will happen? im just super confused...i need help haha... i wrote about all that drama stuff because maybe she takes all this in and judges me from what she hears and sees from her friends...i dont know...im not sure how to deal with it...ive tried like on myspace she added me...im assuming because shes nosy and wants to stalk my page and see what im up to and if im talking to any guys...but i left her a comment saying hi and she never responded so i had went back on her page and saw that her friends were mocking what i wrote and just saying nasty things about me...and to me its just so childish and stupid... i know none of this bothers stephen but when we all get together i want them to like me...it would be extremely awkward for me to come around with him when they all hate me... i really like stephen alot and it makes it hard when a family member doesnt like you ya know? any advice? lol...im gonna need it!
SoulSearch_CO Posted February 15, 2009 Posted February 15, 2009 I'm so confused. I couldn't follow all the "talked to the ex bf, ex gf now hates me..." But anyway... Who cares if she doesn't like you? You're wanting to be involved with Stephen, not Lee. So kill her with kindness. Keep being SUPER nice to her (but not obnoxious). If Stephen is half a man, he'll admire the fact that you're taking higher ground and you can score major points. Don't take the bait when she tries to get you to fight or whatever - just keep being nice. He'll see that you can't be brought into a confrontation with his sister and then it won't matter if she doesn't like you. She'll end up looking like the ass, not you.
I'm Joe Posted February 15, 2009 Posted February 15, 2009 I feel for this guy. I have a cynical, hateful, mean spirited, and downright rude sister, I would hate to hear that someone I like was so adversely affected by her. just take the high road anytime you have to deal with her. she can't hate you forever....actually I take that back if she is like my sister then she could hate you forever. but if she is a normal person you will eventually wear her down.
Island Girl Posted February 15, 2009 Posted February 15, 2009 Focus on your relationship and as the others have said here - just continue to be nice when you are put in a situation where you are around the sister. Don't post to her on myspace but don't remove her or block her either (unless she posts nasty messages to you which may or may not happen). He'll deal with his sister if she tries you meddle or cause any problems between the two of you (or at least he should).
Author jenxbunnyx05 Posted February 16, 2009 Author Posted February 16, 2009 thanks! def needed to hear that stuff! if anything comes up...ill be sure to post!
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