FIREMAN Posted February 14, 2009 Posted February 14, 2009 :confused:My GF & I dated for 2 1/2 years. We had a big fight, but never really "Broke Up". We've just been avoiding eachother for the past month now. However, we still talk regularly during the week, but not w\the frequency we used to. I think neither of us really knows where we stand right now and are in limbo. I'd like it to work out for us. I think she wishes it would too. Our prob is that she always runs to her friends even tho they treat her like crap...or worse! She has little self-confidence or self-esteem and if she is with me on a wknd and they want to go out and she says she's w\me, they say "you're whipped" etc. They be-little her and she takes it cause she doesn't have any TRUE friends and she knows that. It's ruined our relationship cause she won't allow herself to get close to me for fear they'll make fun of her or desert her. In the past, she was dating someone else n dropped her "friends" to be w\her BF. When they broke up she had no friends and had to re-establish contact w\them. She doesn't want that to happen again and her fear is killing us as she refuses to allow herself to get close to me. How can we reconnect. Our 1st Year together was unbelievable, but then her friends and her had a fight, cause SHE always wanted to be with me. Then she backed away... We're both tired of fighting and don't want to break up, but it's causing so much pain and resentment that we may end up there soon. How do we reconnect?
SYL Posted February 14, 2009 Posted February 14, 2009 Your girlfriend has issues with trust and loyalty. She does not seem capable of separating her relationships. There is not much you can do about it until she identifies and resolves her own issues within herself. Until she does, you will continue your limbo in your relationship. It's up to you if you think it's salvageable. Just be prepared that it will be a long and frustrating path to embark on. You cannot 'fix' her. She can only do that for herself.
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