tell-me-more Posted February 13, 2009 Posted February 13, 2009 I'm in an emotional dilemma and I'd like to hear ladies viewpoints. I met a women 6 years ago and we had a 3 month relationship. We first met in a cafe in town. For weeks we did the eye contact thing before we started chatting. It was flirting at its best. We didn't last,in fact it was a right car wreck. A year after we split, she phoned and her first words we " I don't want you back, I want to talk". We chatted a while. Then 1 month later she texted saying " I want closure, and again added I don't want you back. Eventually we stopped texting. We didn't see much of each other for 4 years, and if we met, we'd say hello in the passing and that was that. She's in an on-off relationship and has a 2 year old daughter. But May last year, she approached me ( in the same cafe we'd met in ) and says " I still have feelings for you, a bit of me will always love you. But I don't want you back" Now, here's the scary bit.She wanted to name her daughter with same name as my wife ( but didn't ) Can't believe I went through her mind as she was in a materity ward. ( I got hitched last summer ) I put the whole saga out my mind but since Dec she's in the same cafe on a v regular basis now. We both seem to know that Mon and Fri at 5pm we'll be there. And the whole eye contact thing is very obvious. She'll sneak a glance, say hi, even if her boyfriend is there. He's picked up on it I'm sure. It's hit me like a train that I fancy her rotten and still miss her. But I have a lovely wife and wouldn't risk my marriage for her. So now I'm steering clear for a while. My unanswered questions are... 1 Is the eye contact i I'm in an emotional dilemma and I'd like to hear ladies viewpoints. I met a women 6 years ago and we had a 3 month relationship. We first met in a cafe in town. For weeks we did the eye contact thing before we started chatting. It was flirting at its best. We didn't last,in fact it was a right car crash. A year after we split, she phoned and her first words we " I don't want you back, I want to talk". We chatted a while. Then 1 month later she texted saying " I want closure, and again added I don't want you back. Eventually we stopped texting. We didn't see much of each other for 4 years, and if we met, we'd say hello in the passing and that was that. She's in an on-off relationship and has a 2 year old daughter. But May last year, she approached me ( in the same cafe we'd met in ) and says " I still have feelings for you, a bit of me will always love you. But I don't want you back" Now, here's the scary bit.She wanted to name her daughter with same name as my wife ( but didn't ) Can't believe I went through her mind as she was in a materity ward. ( I got hitched last summer ) I put the whole saga out my mind but since Dec she's in the same cafe on a v regular basis now. We both seem to know that Mon and Fri at 5pm we'll be there. And the whole eye contact thing is very obvious. She'll sneak a glance, say hi, even if her boyfriend is there. He's picked up on it I'm sure. It's hit me like a train that I fancy her rotten and still miss her. But I have a lovely wife and wouldn't risk my marriage for her. So now I'm steering clear for a while. My unanswered questions are... 1 Is the eye contact innocent, or windows to the soul? 2. The big speech back in May, was she sounding me out or just unloading her feelings? 3 Three times she's said " I don't want you back" Does she mean it or has she given herself away? Personally, if I didn't want someone back in my life I wouldn't feel the need to tell them. Your thoughts please... nnocent, or windows to the soul? 2. The big speech back in May, was she sounding me out or just unloading her feelings? 3 Three times she's said " I don't want you back" Does she mean it or has she given herself away? Personally, if I didn't want someone back in my life I wouldn't feel the need to tell them. Your thoughts please...
Geishawhelk Posted February 13, 2009 Posted February 13, 2009 This post is a mess. I'm trying to ignore the deja vu feeling of reading everything twice, and am focussing on your inane and unintelligent questions: It's hit me like a train that I fancy her rotten and still miss her. But I have a lovely wife and wouldn't risk my marriage for her. So now I'm steering clear for a while. yes, but the fact that you're vene mentioning it and have questions is a bit of a red flag to me.... My unanswered questions are... 1 Is the eye contact innocent, or windows to the soul? Oh please! It's bollocks. She's trying to give you the big "come on big boy, come and get it. you know you want it!" routine.... 2. The big speech back in May, was she sounding me out or just unloading her feelings? She's manipulating you to see how far she can yank your chain. It seems she's doing pretty good, given that you don't appear to have a clue what's happening.... She's reeling you in.... 3 Three times she's said " I don't want you back" Does she mean it or has she given herself away? Personally, if I didn't want someone back in my life I wouldn't feel the need to tell them. 'Methinks the lady doth protest too much'..... I don't really want you back - but actually, I want what I can get, and I'm out to get what I want, and what I want is you. Oh, I don't love you. I just want to prove I can still have you, if I want....." Is that clearer?
Author tell-me-more Posted February 13, 2009 Author Posted February 13, 2009 St Albans area, right. My prose might not be brilliant but my Roman history isn't too bad! Sarcasm aside, thanks for the feedback. Don't doubt she's sounding me out but I'll steer clear of her haunts for a while as I've no intention of destroying my marriage. Merci beaucoup...
Geishawhelk Posted February 14, 2009 Posted February 14, 2009 De rien, je vous en prie. A votre service.
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