KipSkip Posted February 13, 2009 Posted February 13, 2009 I have a few good girl friends that seem to like me a lot platonically. We've hardly ever discussed our own relationships, but I do know that their relationship lives are good, as they either have long term boyfriends or get dates. How do I request their help to hook me up or be a wing woman? Is this desperate? I'm brutally shy and don't get many chances to meet girls in the first place, so I figure with those two things against me I should have something like a friend supporting me.
hotgelato Posted February 13, 2009 Posted February 13, 2009 why don't u ask them if they have any single friends? Ask your guy friends to be wingmen. Uglier guy friends.haha
Green Posted February 13, 2009 Posted February 13, 2009 I have a few good girl friends that seem to like me a lot platonically. We've hardly ever discussed our own relationships, but I do know that their relationship lives are good, as they either have long term boyfriends or get dates. How do I request their help to hook me up or be a wing woman? Is this desperate? I'm brutally shy and don't get many chances to meet girls in the first place, so I figure with those two things against me I should have something like a friend supporting me. I agree with the other poster that if your looking for a wing it should be a wingman but not necesarily an uglier friend. A friend who is good with women would make a better wing then a friend who isn't. As for your female friends if you are attracted to them you should just ask them out that would be alot better then trying to use them as a dating service. If you feel you must ask your friends to set you up on dates just be honest with them and say your shy and you feel that if you could just be introduced you could take it from there.
MN randomguy Posted February 13, 2009 Posted February 13, 2009 I don't know quite how to ask it. But, I agree with the OP on some level. If you are thinking of something specifically that your female friends can do to be helpful I wouldn't see the harm. As Green said, admit that you're brutally shy. Friends are supposed to be supportive aren't they? Another note. Do not ask them to set you up. If they offer, be clear that you have veto power on anything for any or no reason. Don't let them create a high pressure situation. You most likely don't want to date their friends, but, a wingwoman is less threatening than a wingman.
Green Posted February 13, 2009 Posted February 13, 2009 I don't know quite how to ask it. But, I agree with the OP on some level. If you are thinking of something specifically that your female friends can do to be helpful I wouldn't see the harm. As Green said, admit that you're brutally shy. Friends are supposed to be supportive aren't they? Another note. Do not ask them to set you up. If they offer, be clear that you have veto power on anything for any or no reason. Don't let them create a high pressure situation. You most likely don't want to date their friends, but, a wingwoman is less threatening than a wingman. you make some great points, definetly just have them introduce you because you could very well be set up with some girl you really don't find attractive.
Author KipSkip Posted February 13, 2009 Author Posted February 13, 2009 THanks for the responses so far. The reason I said wingwomen and not wingmen is, well, as much as other guys my age might ACT like they know what they're doing, they really don't. You might get a few who are total lady killers, but they usually don't like to share. A girl friend, on the other hand, usually knows a lot of girls and can just expose you to them by merely hanging out. They're usually more motivated to help a guy friend, too. From my experience, guys are only looking out for themselves, not their buddies. And most of these girl friends I'm referring to are my guy friend's girlfriends and thus just friends with me.
BCCA Posted February 13, 2009 Posted February 13, 2009 I'll just be honest, women dont make good wings for guys because they can get jealous of someone taking you away from them, they really have no vested in interest in whether you meet someone or not, and what they think you should want isnt usually what you actually want. I have several good friends that are women, and weve decided that we arent good wing-persons for eachother. Your best bet is to find another single guy similar to you, and help eachother out. Critique eachother, give suggestions, etc.
MN randomguy Posted February 14, 2009 Posted February 14, 2009 you make some great points, definetly just have them introduce you because you could very well be set up with some girl you really don't find attractive. Thanks, That's my experience. If they are going to set you up with their friends they're going to try to get you to accept their most desperate friends. Usually,... they're desperate for a reason. But, if its girls that neither of you know it'd be better, or if they can get it through their heads not to start arguing over who's going to be the maid-of-honor and everyone's grown-up about it, might be worth a shot.
Green Posted February 14, 2009 Posted February 14, 2009 The reason I said wingwomen and not wingmen is, well, as much as other guys my age might ACT like they know what they're doing, they really don't. You might get a few who are total lady killers, but they usually don't like to share. A girl friend, on the other hand, usually knows a lot of girls and can just expose you to them by merely hanging out. They're usually more motivated to help a guy friend, too. From my experience, guys are only looking out for themselves, not their buddies. A wingman isn't suposed to share with you he just creates a situation weather it be at a night club or some barbq party, library where he talks to one girl while you talk to the other girl. Havn't you often seen girls in groups of more then one? thats when a wingman comes in handy other then that don't expect will smith from the movie hitch to help u. Yes a girl might know alot of girls and if your her friend and shes inviting you to parties she throws or out on the nights on the town you will probably meet some of her girlfriends most of them don't have the ability set you up on dates with attractive friends other then the natural introductions you'll get weather you ask to meet their friends or not. Sorry if I sound harsh please forgive me I'll just be honest, women dont make good wings for guys because they can get jealous of someone taking you away from them, they really have no vested in interest in whether you meet someone or not, and what they think you should want isnt usually what you actually want. Your best bet is to find another single guy similar to you, and help eachother out. Critique eachother, give suggestions, etc. This is the truth a good percentage of women most likely including your friends who are women will only cock block you and try to set you up with girls who were for some reason undateable and thats at best! And when BCCA says they'll want you to themselves that stands true even if its just your attention as the friend of her bf nothing more. If they are going to set you up with their friends they're going to try to get you to accept their most desperate friends. Exactly I mean you may get lucky and be really happy with who you get set up with, you may end up like Norbit in that Eddie Murphey movie where he plays the she devil. Your best bet is to just start flirting with girls casualy asking them out seriously I know your shy but do u know how silly it is that you drive a car but are to affraid to walk up to cute defensless girls and say "hi" cmon man do it! I know the fear is all to real but your hornyness should surpass it right... maybe stop whacking it but keep looking at porn lol
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