4givrnt4gtr Posted February 12, 2009 Posted February 12, 2009 Ive been dating this guy for 2 months. He is pretty awesome, super nice, caring and overall, the relationship so far seems pretty balanced. However, Ive starting to think that I may be doing too much for him. For instance, yesterday I went over to his place. After hanging out for a bit we went out to buy some stuff he needed and get some food. When we got back I went to his room to leave some of the stuff we bought. He told me it was messy and not to mind it. Well, he started cleaning up and I asked him if he wanted me to help. He was kinda hesitant but he finally asked me if i could help him fold some of the laundry that was on his bed. and i did... After a bit he finished doing whatever he was doing and went downstair to make us dinner, while I finished folding his laundry. Was my folding his laundry a bit much after only 2 months of dating?? I mean, on one hand, he was cooking us dinner while I helped him out with the clothes...On the other hand...I dont know, makes me feel like I may be stepping onto dangerous ground there.... After dinner I helped him wash dishes as well...and last weekend when he was over I kept making him food, giving him massages etc. Even he asked me what could he do for me since I was being so nice and doing so much for him. Another biggie is that usually we dont have much sex, but when we do get into that area, for the most part, I always end up giving him bjs...I mean i love it, but i again, am i doing too much? When i give him bjs he always asks me what can he do for me to make me feel good, but i honestly cant think of anything. I dont really like oral so thats not really an option but still, I dont want him to think im a total doormat. Am I being a total doormat here? should i not be so nice to him like this? what can I do to not being so overly....giving i guess...
DunnoWhat Posted February 12, 2009 Posted February 12, 2009 You're offering to do those things and he's always asking what can he do for you. So no you're not a doormat. Are you a feminist?
manugeorge Posted February 12, 2009 Posted February 12, 2009 It's up to you. Do you genuinely enjoy doing those things for him? Do you feel like your kindness is not being reciprocated? Helping someone cook for BOTH of you or doing dishes when he cooked is just common courtesy.
dreamergrl Posted February 12, 2009 Posted February 12, 2009 I don't think you are being a doormat. It seems like he wants to do things for you as well, but you aren't allowing it. If you can't voice what you want, then take a few steps back from doing so much for him.
Oliveman Posted February 12, 2009 Posted February 12, 2009 Are you sure that you don't like oral? I hear that a lot from women, but I can usually change their minds pretty fast. Have you ever let him try? I find that a lot of guys have no clue what to do down there and women think they don't like it, but they just haven't really had someone who wasn't inept try it out. It's like going to McDonalds and getting a Cheeseburger and thinking you don't like beef if you don't like it there. Just a thought. Make sure you communicate with him as well since every girl is different.
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