TheEndofFaith Posted February 10, 2009 Posted February 10, 2009 I am not necessarily looking for advice on this, just looking for a little input to contrast my own opinion to Background on me: I'm male, 21 years old, and in college at a large public university. I am not unattractive by any means from my judgment, but i'm not quite on par with the girl that the situation revolves around. I'm also very intelligent by my measure and by others, not to give way to arrogance Background on female of interest: She is 20 years old and very attractive physically. She has had a tough childhood as her family is quite unstable and she was at least mildly emotionally abused as a child by her stepfather. This has affected her confidence in many ways and also the way she forges interpersonal relationships. She is very caring and understanding, and reasonably intelligent. So, there's this girl that have been quite interested in for the past year or so. The thing is, we went to high school together, but were never really anything more than acquaintances then. Sophomore year of college is when we started to hang out a lot. I hung out/texted/talked to her constantly for a good 3 months, but then she studied abroad. I was pretty interested in her by the time she left, and even told her how i felt, but she didn't really feel the same way at this point. We were also very emotionally close by now. She told me nearly all of her problems and came to me for advice all the time Fast forward 9 months to start of junior year: Didn't really see her over the summer. Start of junior year and she started talking to me and hanging out with me all the time. She constantly tells me how she is the only guy she can trust and the nicest one she has ever met etc etc and has said on several occasions that she thinks i am physically attractive also. The thing is, i'm still interested in her now and i can't seem to shake it. If i try to stop talking to her or something it doesn't work because she texts me all the time and if I don't respond she gets anxious and wonders why. I can't really stop bein friends with her because she has said she depends on me so much and all this stuff and also comments how everyone she has ever been close to has left her. So basically i can't bear to leave her but it is also tearing me up because i have no way to 'move on' as you might say. If I were to tell her my feelings again she would shrug it off as she did before and pretend it didn't happen. She may be romantically interested in me slightly, but could not bear to give up our friendship if things went south I am pretty sure So, I am in a 'Catch 22' you might say. Any ideas?
infophreak Posted February 10, 2009 Posted February 10, 2009 I was pretty interested in her by the time she left, and even told her how i felt, but she didn't really feel the same way at this point. You are a friend. Continue to be a friend. But, you'll need to find someone else to date, she is not into you, and the sooner you admit that to yourself the sooner you will find someone who will reciprocate your feelings for them.
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