JackJack Posted February 9, 2009 Posted February 9, 2009 he doesnt see why im finishing it as he told me how he got the bite on his neck and why he had a condom in his wallet and he told me to think what i want and that im a paranoid control freak with major issues oh and god help any man that comes near me. Just him telling you, that you are a control freak with major issues....and God help the next man that comes around you, should be enough for you to know, he is not worth it, that you can do better, and that you've made the right choice...... Someone that loves and cares for another doesn't say those things or act that way......its all based on the fact that he was found out and he has to blame someone because he sure as hell isn't going to own up to anything. I hope you're able to close this chapter in your life, take from it what you can and make way for something better!
Tomcat33 Posted February 9, 2009 Posted February 9, 2009 he doesnt see why im finishing it as he told me how he got the bite on his neck and why he had a condom in his wallet and he told me to think what i want and that im a paranoid control freak with major issues oh and god help any man that comes near me. TYPICAL reaction of a cheating liar, you confront them with what THEY did and they try to make YOU out to be the nutty nut. Don't allow that, and good for you for getting out show him you will not tolerate that level of disrespect. I am sure it took a lot of guts on your part, now I only hope you can stay strong to your decision. I can guarantee you he will try to convince you to take him back in a few days once the dust settles and that is going to be the true test of what you did and where you stand. Because let me tell you, what is far worse than putting up with something like what he did to you? Giving him an ultimatum and backing down on your word. That will send him a very clear message he can do whatever he wants with you with 0 concequences. If it takes him 7 months to grovel his way back into your life and prove to you he is worthy that is a decision you would be highly at risk to take thinking people can change in a long time, BUT guaranteed people do not change in a few days of desperate "I am so sorry please take me back I regret what I did and I am changed" NO THEY DO NOT, and NO THEY ARE NOT. Be strong!!
2sunny Posted February 9, 2009 Posted February 9, 2009 wow- i love it when a gal (or man) sees that someone is disrespecting them and actually takes action for their healthy position. way to go! you have shown that you have a healthy boundary and you aren't going to settle for the crap that someone wants to dish out. this will give you a lot of power and self respect! woo hoo. his actions are just him being defensive because he knows he got caught. he was banking on you not noticing and not calling him on his crap. now that he knows you find this to be unacceptable - he's trying to squirm around the truth of what he did, then gaslighting you to boot! it's still his fault... don't let him try to make it about you - it's not. stay in this healthy place - you are doing great! be proud of your progress! i'm proud of you!
blind_otter Posted February 9, 2009 Posted February 9, 2009 i cant say anything to him. today he told me i need madeical help to sort my head out. I had an ex years ago who cheated on me multiple times, and he was always trying to make me feel like I was crazy and that it was all in my head. I think that's a normal tactic for men who cheat. They distract you. Anyways, good for you. I know it will be hard, but you will get through this and believe me, in a few months you will feel a whole lot better about yourself.
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