rummydummy Posted February 8, 2009 Posted February 8, 2009 I am 47 years young, my g/f is 55 and my new female friend is 28. The problem I am having is that I do not know how to tell my g/f about the other as we have been together 10 years. My g/f knows about the 28 YOld but does not know her and has no clue I moved out because of the younger one.. My g/f is very negative as she has been for the last 5 years. On the other hand the 28 year old tells me how happy I make her when we are together. The 28 year old and I have been seeing eachother for the last 5 months and have yet to have sex due to me having that much respect for her. Also, she is pregnant with another mans child that she hates. I have raised 2 step-daughters already and have told the 28 YOld that it does not bother me. I know I am capable of having my own children but now is not the right time. The 28 year old wants to have one more child. My g/f has chrones disease real bad and I do not want to hurt her any more than i have already by moving out. I just do not know how to tell her. Any advice would be appreciated. thank you!
Geishawhelk Posted February 8, 2009 Posted February 8, 2009 Are you for real? I mean, really, are you serious? My guess is that you're not English...... Are you? If your 55 year old GF knows about the younger one - and you have moved out - do you suppose she is thick as two short planks to not put 2 and 2 together and make 5? I think she suspects, don't you? Unless she really is thick. Which she might well be to still put up with you. And you're no better. Surely, little miss pregnant will want the baby's father to take responsibility.... Unless of course, she doesn't really know who he is. Or he doesn't give a damn, and it's culturally difficult to make a man be responsible for where he puts his peeny-weeny.... This is a joke, right? Do the words "commitment" and fidelity" mean nothing to you? What's all the bull about having respect for the younger girl to not have sex with her.... don't you have sufficient respect for your GF to NOT be unfaithful to her and stay with her....? Or maybe she's getting too old for you and as far as you're concerned, she's due for the scrap-heap....? This is insane.
MichelleS1983 Posted February 9, 2009 Posted February 9, 2009 The 28 year old and I have been seeing eachother for the last 5 months and have yet to have sex due to me having that much respect for her. I'm sure it also has to do with her being pregnant. That could certainly be a detriment to some hot times with your youngin'. Wow - a 21 year age difference. Quite the ego stroke for a man of almost 50, eh? Can we say, "MidLife Crisis?" I knew we could.
theBrokenMuse Posted February 9, 2009 Posted February 9, 2009 This is insane. Don't you get it Geisha? She had to be this major buzzkill and go out and get Crohn's disease. How dare she not be happy and healthy for him! I bet that selfish woman actually expected her boyfriend of ten years to care for her during her illness too! I mean, how self-absorbed could she possibly get?! What, does she really think she's entitled to his loyalty after being together for ten years? Doesn't she get that it's all about what makes him happy? Doesn't she realize that she is supposed to just lay down and die or slink off into oblivion after telling him how thrilled that she is that he's finally going out there to find true luuuuurve with some pregnant girl half her age? I mean, what kind of woman would deny a man the opportunity to be with such a downright, classy lady as this.... In all seriousness, yeah I think insane pretty much covers it.
taylor Posted February 10, 2009 Posted February 10, 2009 Sounds like you are already making long-term plans with your new friend. Is your new friend on the same page with you? Does she want to start a life with you? How does she feel about you leaving your girlfriend for her? What reason did you give your girlfriend for moving out? If you moved out, isn't she technically your ex-girlfriend now? You say your new friend wants another child. Did she say she wants that child to be yours? This new relationship seems to be moving pretty fast..and you haven't even had sex yet...hmmm... Do you worry about the age difference? Do you worry about her motives? Did you discuss what her child will call you when it's born...dad or grandpa? You wonder what to tell your ex-girlfriend? Tell her you left her for a pregnant 28 year old you just met who wants to use you until she finds someone her own age to have a real relationship with. You won't hurt her. She will probably laugh.
nicki Posted February 10, 2009 Posted February 10, 2009 So, you have already made your decision, and only want to know how to tell your girlfriend? You need a brick to the side of the head. Have you even thought of the fact that this pregnant 28 year old who HATES the father of her baby is out to use you? Don't have such a big ego that you think she would be interested in you simply because you are wonderful. You've got something she wants. Money. Support for her. Gratitude that you got a younger woman. Her youth is currency, too. But, don't you worry that she will cheat on you with a younger hotter guy once she delivers that baby? And what if YOU get ill? Think she will stick around? I'm not trying to be a killjoy here. I'd say the same thing to a woman in your position. Don't let your ego cloud your judgment. You don't have to stay with your current girlfriend if you don't want to. But, don't dump her simply because of this younger woman. I smell a user. And I think she is the one who doesn't want to sleep with you, not the other way around. That's a red flag. I suspect she's gaslighting you. I could be wrong, though. But, keep your eyes open to the true situation going on here. Karma can be a b*tch. Watch out how you treat your loyal girlfriend of ten years.
KismetGirl Posted February 15, 2009 Posted February 15, 2009 I am 47 years young, my g/f is 55 and my new female friend is 28. The problem I am having is that I do not know how to tell my g/f about the other as we have been together 10 years. My g/f knows about the 28 YOld but does not know her and has no clue I moved out because of the younger one.. My g/f is very negative as she has been for the last 5 years. On the other hand the 28 year old tells me how happy I make her when we are together. The 28 year old and I have been seeing eachother for the last 5 months and have yet to have sex due to me having that much respect for her. Also, she is pregnant with another mans child that she hates. I have raised 2 step-daughters already and have told the 28 YOld that it does not bother me. I know I am capable of having my own children but now is not the right time. The 28 year old wants to have one more child. My g/f has chrones disease real bad and I do not want to hurt her any more than i have already by moving out. I just do not know how to tell her. Any advice would be appreciated. thank you! The second half of your username seems fairly accurate at the moment. I hve one phrase for you: mid-life crisis. You have a girlfriend who you say has a debilitating disease, who you've been with for ten years, and who you are obviously treating like crap, and you expect her to be...what....jumping for joy? Giving you strip teases and telling you that your c*ck is the most fabulous thing she's ever seen? Give me a break. This 28 year old who "hates" the father of her unborn child is using you. Does she work? i gather she isn't doing well financially. I gather she's hoping you'll help out in that department. And FYI, she isn't f**king you because she's 28, youre 47, and she's PREGNANT. If you think she is going to stick around when your butt gets to 60 you have another thing coming. She's going to make you take care of her for a while until she finds a nice young man closer to her in age to take care of her instead. What sort of woman shacks up with a man old enough to be her father when she's pregnant with someone else's kid? I feel sorry for your girlfriend. With all due respect, you sound pathetic for what you are doing to her. I hope for your sake karma does not exist, so that when one day if you ever get stricken with a painful, horrible medical condition that your "loved one" just ups and leaves you for a new model. Disgusting.
BUTTAFLYH Posted February 15, 2009 Posted February 15, 2009 To Geisha: "My guess is that you're not English...... Are you?" What does being English have to do with anything? As if anyone who is not English has no morals. Get off your high horse. Thanks.
Geishawhelk Posted February 15, 2009 Posted February 15, 2009 I have no high horse. It's not a question of Morals.... His not being English has to do with being part of a different culture, where the society he comes from may have different standards and opinions of the roles and status of women in their society. I was clarifying to try to ascertain whether his new young love had recourse against the father of her baby, or whether in fact, trying to do so would actually bring her more problems and social stigma. A simple question to me as to why I asked would have clarified the point. I was addressing the OP, but as might have been predicted, he has since made himself scarce. Quelle surprise. By the way, I'm trilingual, so someone speaking English as a second language, and coming from a different culture, is not something I ever look down upon. Hope that clarifies it sufficiently for you.
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