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I need to vent.. are we falling apart?


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Posted

My boyfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship for almost 8 months, and live about 6 hours away from each other. We have always made time to visit eachother about twice a month, despite the fact that we're so busy with school and work.. either he drives down to see me or I fly up to see him..since I don't have a car. We met on vacation during summer and it was the sweetest thing. I love him to death and I am so happy with him. We have the strongest relationship, and everyone is always so amazed when we say its a long distance relationship. It got to the point where we started talking about moving in with each other by the end of this year and transferring schools to be closer together. And knowing me, I wouldnt make such a big decision unless I really knew he was the one. However, recently hes just been complaining about how the he hates the sex.. since it sometimes hurts me because its just gets tight since we haven't seen each other in a while. He told me to go to the doctor to get it checked out.. so I did and they didnt find any infections or anything. So then he still complains and says when he used to have sex with other girls it never hurt them. I told him he has to be understanding of this.. and then he gets mad at me when I told him that it used to never hurt with my ex-boyfriend.. so that makes him wonder why its hurting with him. Although this has always been an issue, lately he's just been bringing up the fact that I have slept with 4 other guys.. (I am 20 and he is 19) and calls he a huge slut even when I tell him that I really am not. He has done way more than me... 9 girls.. (or so he said). He's been saying like... "you're such a slut you're just like every other girl I used to sleep with... so why am I even with you?? what makes you so special??" The fact that he could even say that to me makes me very very upset... and right now I am just so depressed. Everything he says is so negative and rude like... "I dont care if we're together or not. Do I sound like I care?? If you want to stay together, you have to make the effort." Tonight he kept hinting at being friends... like "we'll still hang out if we're still friends." :( I am just so heartbroken over this. I love him so much, we have the best times together and I can't imagine my life without him. I really want to stay with him. I know this situation looks really bad if you're reading this.. but I can't help expressing how much I love him.. please help.

Posted

well i hate to be the bearer of bad news but it is over..... there are 2 issues here...has the sex thing ever been an issue before recently? if not then he is sabotaging your relationship. As sad and as juvenile as that is, I think that is what he is doing. The other issue is anyone who cares about their partner would not say those terrible things he said to you. I know that you think he is great and everything but he sounds like a jerk. No man would ever say that to his girlfriend. Then to turn around and say we'd still hang out if we were friends....man that really pisses me off. There are plenty of other guys out there....that are a little more mature then.....oh wait...he's 19....well that explains it...get rid of him fast. He's not worth the tons of heartbreak that is coming your way should you decide to stay with him.

Posted

I could go into a 36 page discussion as to why this is not going to work.

 

Executive Summary: it will NOT work.

 

This guy is a loser. He has already met someone else and he is planning his exit strategy with you. He probably is sleeping with this other person, or at least wants to.

 

My suggestion: keep your options open, play the field, and dont spend any time calling or thinking of this loser. If he wants to come over and visit and you have nothing to do, fine, but make sure he pays.

 

But in the interim, go find yourself another man that will treat you with respect. Go **** some other men and ask them if you were too tight. Sheesh.. complaining you are too tight? are you kidding me, what a moron! "hey, you are such a dirty slut.. and you are way too tight" LOL, tooooo funny.

 

And when you find that better man, tell this guy to **** off

Posted

This guy is an idiot. He didn't think to take pride in the fact that he hurts you? He could look at it like he is better endowed then your exs. You could tell him, You're tight because you don't have sex with anyone else. My opinion is. He does not commit adequate time in foreplay to get you warmed up. The other thing is to have you on the top so you can handle the pace of insertion. A few adjustments and everyone is happy......very happy! What an idiot. Find someone who knows what hes doing.

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