Zammo25 Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 My final e mail of 3 ays ago has been replied with a polite text on my mobile saying " thanks for the e mail. I haven't replied earlier as I have been busy. Hope you are keeping well. We can meet up and be friends. Look after youself. Take care X. Will answer your e mail later in the week ". Thats about as much " fu*k off I don't give a **** about you anymore but I felt obliged to reply " as you can get isn't it ?. I do not know how to reply to that but will not. It has hurt me but its nothing more than I expected. I am not sorry for or regret sending my final e mail with lots of kind words but this Woman is now cold as a dead fish I know. What does everyone think of that sh*t ?. Should I reply ?.
Author Zammo25 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 my final e mail of 3 ays ago has been replied with a polite text on my mobile saying " thanks for the e mail. I haven't replied earlier as i have been busy. Hope you are keeping well. We can meet up and be friends. Look after youself. Take care x. Will answer your e mail later in the week ". Thats about as much " fu*k off i don't give a **** about you anymore but i felt obliged to reply " as you can get isn't it ?. I do not know how to reply to that but will not. It has hurt me but its nothing more than i expected. I am not sorry for or regret sending my final e mail with lots of kind words but this woman is now cold as a dead fish i know. What does everyone think of that sh*t ?. Should i reply ?. what a fuc*ing bitch !.
Author Zammo25 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 My final e mail of 3 ays ago has been replied with a polite text on my mobile saying " thanks for the e mail. I haven't replied earlier as I have been busy. Hope you are keeping well. We can meet up and be friends. Look after youself. Take care X. Will answer your e mail later in the week ". Thats about as much " fu*k off I don't give a **** about you anymore but I felt obliged to reply " as you can get isn't it ?. I do not know how to reply to that but will not. It has hurt me but its nothing more than I expected. I am not sorry for or regret sending my final e mail with lots of kind words but this Woman is now cold as a dead fish I know. What does everyone think of that sh*t ?. Should I reply ?. I spilled my heart out in my e mail,and all I got was this ****. What a cold , heartless BITCH. Help me !. i SPILLED MY HE
Author Zammo25 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 I spilled my heart out in my e mail,and all I got was this ****. What a cold , heartless BITCH. Help me !. i SPILLED MY HE I spilled my heart out and all I got was this **** !. Help me.
Geishawhelk Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 " thanks for the e mail. I haven't replied earlier as I have been busy. Hope you are keeping well. We can meet up and be friends. Look after youself. Take care X. Will answer your e mail later in the week ". Thats about as much " fu*k off I don't give a **** about you anymore but I felt obliged to reply " as you can get isn't it ? No, actually, it isn't. She might have just said. "Got your mail. Won't be answering". But actually she sounded relatively polite.... If I had been her, I would ahve found receiving a mail like that very sad. At one time, there was something very special there. Honestly Zammo, i don't read it as a F**k off text at all..... I do not know how to reply to that but will not. Good. I wouldn't. No reply is necessary. It has hurt me but its nothing more than I expected. I am not sorry for or regret sending my final e mail with lots of kind words but this Woman is now cold as a dead fish I know. What does everyone think of that sh*t ?. I think you should wait until she replies. if she replies. If she's good on her word, she will. If she's really as flaky as you think, she won't. Wait and see. But don't hold your breath, and work to detach. In fact, even if she does reply, make that the last word between you. Don' go back and forth responding. Let it lie, Zammo....Let it lie. ]
Author Zammo25 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 No, actually, it isn't. She might have just said. "Got your mail. Won't be answering". But actually she sounded relatively polite.... If I had been her, I would ahve found receiving a mail like that very sad. At one time, there was something very special there. Honestly Zammo, i don't read it as a F**k off text at all..... Good. I wouldn't. No reply is necessary. I think you should wait until she replies. if she replies. If she's good on her word, she will. If she's really as flaky as you think, she won't. Wait and see. But don't hold your breath, and work to detach. In fact, even if she does reply, make that the last word between you. Don' go back and forth responding. Let it lie, Zammo....Let it lie. ] Thank you geishawhelk. Always there to help. I feel very weak and feel the need to reply. This is as you said it would be. She does not give a Rats arse about me anymore and I am here again feeling deep pain and she was " too busy " to respond to my e mail and will get around to it sometime . What a BITCH. I hate her so much for whats she has done to me. Please offer me some help. Should I reply. I feel like replyingm with a sarcastic resposnse. " don't bother replying if its too much trouble ". I feel like textig her what a f*cking bitch she is and hope she burns in hell.
not_a_happy_camper Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Zammo don't sink to that. look, you said the other day that you weren't expecting a reply and didn't want one. It probably would have been better off for your sake if she hadn't replied, but sending an emotive email like that generally will get a reply. You can't get angry at her for responding the way she did. I"m not blaming you for what happened, but in general with things like this, if you're putting yourself out there, even if it was for closure, you still have to expect the worst. hope for the best, but expect the worse. And now you have to deal with that. Don't stoop to sending her vicious texts. It's not nice. She may not have been so nice to you, do not stoop to that level. Especially after sending her an email telling you how much you cared? why would you send her a text saying she's a b*tch? you're contradicting yourself. And based only on a text she sent, which to be honest, wasn't a bad reply. She's moved on. you have to respect that. I know it's hard. Do not show her your anger. you'll regret that more than anything. Wait until she responds to your email. Post how you feel here, before you do anything rash.
westrock Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Should I reply. I feel like replyingm with a sarcastic resposnse. " don't bother replying if its too much trouble ". I feel like textig her what a f*cking bitch she is and hope she burns in hell. Whoa slow down here. You will regret sending a reply like you're suggesting. You're hurting and not thinking straight. Re-read her reply to you. I read nothing in her reply that was negative. Give her some time to absorb what you wrote in your original email. I think you would want her to reply back having put some thought into her reply rather than sending some type of knee jerk reply, so give her time.
Meaplus3 Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 NO. Do not reply. Wait for her to send a message back and see what happens. If you reply you are giving her way to much power her Zammo. Just wait and see. Mea:)
Author Zammo25 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 Whoa slow down here. You will regret sending a reply like you're suggesting. You're hurting and not thinking straight. Re-read her reply to you. I read nothing in her reply that was negative. Give her some time to absorb what you wrote in your original email. I think you would want her to reply back having put some thought into her reply rather than sending some type of knee jerk reply, so give her time. Why do I still Love this btich ?. Why, Why Why ?.
Author Zammo25 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 NO. Do not reply. Wait for her to send a message back and see what happens. If you reply you are giving her way to much power her Zammo. Just wait and see. Mea:) I read " I am too busy to reply " as I am shagging someone else. She does not giave a RATS ARSE about me anymore. My God this Woman has f8cked my head up.
not_a_happy_camper Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 I don't think it means that Zammo. She probably needs to think about what to say, those kind of things aren't easy. And at least she texted to acknowledge your email? It was going to hurt if she replied anyway, you're being very hard on her and yourself.
Meaplus3 Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 I read " I am too busy to reply " as I am shagging someone else. She does not giave a RATS ARSE about me anymore. My God this Woman has f8cked my head up. Yes she probably has. And you allowing her to even more by not moving on and forgetting about her. I've been where you are in the past and it stinks. The best way to move foward is to have No further contact. Break the connection, grieve for a bit over the feelings and free yourself from this nightmare. Why continue to let her get to you? My feeling is your better than that. Mea:)
ColorCube Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Hi buddy. I have said this a couple of weeks ago but SHE DOES NOT LOVE YOU ANYMORE. Don't do this to yourself. I broke NC after 30 days with a final e mail. Thats it, OVER, DONE , DUSTED. You cannot make her love you. You should NOT have turned up without calling first. Listen you are starting to get in STALKER territory and that is sad and pathetic. Certainly thats the way she will look at it. You must NEVER do that again. I think you need to consider counselling. You do not want a restraining order which is the way you are going. We are in this together. Send me a private message and we can get through this together. You deserve BETTER than this sh*t. You have to move on. Should I reply. I feel like replyingm with a sarcastic resposnse. " don't bother replying if its too much trouble ". You answered your own question on another thread You sent her a FINAL email. Thats it, OVER, DONE , DUSTED
SRV Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Zammo, if there are no kids, other business like things that you both need to take care of, I would highly suggest that you let this one be. The reply, even if she does reply, will not be to your expectation. At this point I am assuming that you expect her to apologize, say she made a mistake, want you back, buddy it will not happen. You better detach and let this go before you spiral into some deep depression and destructive behavior. Do you have friends or family around you? Please find a support system around you and embrace and utilize it to the maximum. If need be, take some time off work and maybe speak to a professional. I hope you feel better soon and let her go sooner, it is done, she is gone and not coming back. Good luck buddy, we are rooting for you!
honey2910 Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Zammo I would be harsh to say as I am also going through this situation Actually you dont love her anymore its because you feel defeated in your mind that how can she refused your love and walked away so easily. You have to accept that a drama is over where you were main character. The story is ended. But until you will not end all hope of reconcile nothing will change. But you know, you have to accept this and move on.... Dont just give that person your time thinking about her.
Author Zammo25 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 Zammo, if there are no kids, other business like things that you both need to take care of, I would highly suggest that you let this one be. The reply, even if she does reply, will not be to your expectation. At this point I am assuming that you expect her to apologize, say she made a mistake, want you back, buddy it will not happen. You better detach and let this go before you spiral into some deep depression and destructive behavior. Do you have friends or family around you? Please find a support system around you and embrace and utilize it to the maximum. If need be, take some time off work and maybe speak to a professional. I hope you feel better soon and let her go sooner, it is done, she is gone and not coming back. Good luck buddy, we are rooting for you! It is over isn't it ?.
Author Zammo25 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 My final e mail of 3 ays ago has been replied with a polite text on my mobile saying " thanks for the e mail. I haven't replied earlier as I have been busy. Hope you are keeping well. We can meet up and be friends. Look after youself. Take care X. Will answer your e mail later in the week ". Thats about as much " fu*k off I don't give a **** about you anymore but I felt obliged to reply " as you can get isn't it ?. I do not know how to reply to that but will not. It has hurt me but its nothing more than I expected. I am not sorry for or regret sending my final e mail with lots of kind words but this Woman is now cold as a dead fish I know. What does everyone think of that sh*t ?. Should I reply ?. I think the statement thst says it all is " I got your email ( where I told my true feelings ) but I have been too busy to reply " ).
ColorCube Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 I think the statement thst says it all is " I got your email ( where I told my true feelings ) but I have been too busy to reply " ). So you didn't send her a FINAL email? You were sending her an email to keep the channels of communication open so you could try and get her back but she didn't respond the way you wanted her to so you are upset.. see it yet?
Geishawhelk Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Zammo. You told us you had an e-mail to send. Lots of people replied. I actually don't think it would have mattered what anybody said to you. You'd have sent it anyway, even if everyone had told you not to. In fact, at one point, you were completely convinced that everyone without exception, had told you not to..... In fact, some said, send it if you think it will give you closure. Other said - don't send it. In any case - you sent it. Now, I don't know who you think, in your mind, was on your side or not. But you have now found that sending her the e-mail did anything BUT give you closure. It's opened up all the old wounds again, and stirred a whole bunch of new ones up. So will you just quit whupping yourself now, and try to leave it alone? The most importsant thing for you is to start gaining some composure and finalising things in your mind. Yes. It's Over. It;s finished. It is no more. Done and dusted. Gone. Finito. IT'S OVER. She is an ex, and quite frankly, it's none of your buisness what she does any more, she's not beholden to you, she's not responsible to you, and she's moved on with her life. Of course it's going to be easier for her, she's the one who broke it off!! So don't be surprised, angry, mad, pi$$ed off - if she's been getting on with her life, because it's what you should have been doing too. Nobody else has seen her text in the way you have. But she answered you. Something you'd tried to convince yourself she wouldn't probably do. And now she has, you're mad as hell. Whatever her motives or reasons for writing what she did, you've distorted it to suit you, because it's easier to think of her as callous and heartless and cold. But you know she really isn't. The only thing is, is that she's gone. So really, I think you're done now. Send her a text and say : Please do NOT reply. I don't want a reply. Please just leave things as they are. Let me go on with my life. I just needed to send you that, to try to get closure. Goodbye. And then stop. Just stop all this. Just stop it.
Goatsbreath Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Zammo, maybe we are dating the same girl, haha, because honestly my Ex would deliver the same type of sentences, all nice and polite. Then in the next breath she would take a knife out of the freezer, carve my heart out of my chest and say, "were you looking for this, sorry I stepped on it while I was being taken to bed bye the new guy." This girl wants to be friends, keep you around, is nice about it but will let you know shes moved on with complete disregard as to how you will handle it. Truthfully, its her right to choose the life she wants and now its our choice to accept that and move on. I lost 19 days NC today but whatever, its a number and it has nothing to do with my recovery because I know for sure I'm not on day 1. I remember day 1 and this is not it. Holy crap day 1 sucked. Zammo, you need to want to move on and I know its hard. Read some of these post if you have not. If you have read them over again because its helped me. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t171930/ http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t171834/ good luck friend
sedgwick Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 A few days ago you said that if you sent this email and she didn't reply you'd be fine. She did reply, and you're not only posting about it but replying to your own post to continue to call her a b*tch. You have to remember what it was you said to yourself before you sent it.
Weird Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 dude just forget it and start to truly move on. Doubtful you will get any satisfactory response out of future communication and it will only piss you off even more. I know it sucks but really, the only way to "get better" is to just end all communication and continue forward.
lonelygurl Posted February 7, 2009 Posted February 7, 2009 Zammo I understand how you feel. It is so hard for us to be in so much pain and they just seem to be moving along happy as clams in their life with new g/f's/b/f's. Treating us like we never mattered or existed. It is very hurtful and painful. You have been treated badly and betrayed. All I can tell you as my counselor told me today is feel the pain. It is horrible to feel it but it is the only way you will heal from it. You are not alone in your pain.
not_a_happy_camper Posted February 7, 2009 Posted February 7, 2009 exactly like lonelygurl said. Dude, you just have to embrace it. It's easy to think I can fight this and work it out. But clearly that won't work. You really have to embrace the pain. Feel it. Acknowledge it and understand what it is. Accept the reason for feeling it. But know that when you embrace it................it is healing in itself. It might not feel like it at the time..............but knowing it is what it is will help. you need to feel these feelings, but don't act on them. I know how much it hurts Zammo. I got a reply to an email I didn't want a reply to, and like geisha said, it did anything but bring closure. Made things worse in fact. That's two and a half months ago. I still hurt, but i know it's getting better. You will get there too, I promise.
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