lovelylovely1 Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 we've been seeing each other for about a month, a little over. I've stayed at his place 3 times now, each time we've shared a bed. We've made out, but there hasn't been anything more. I've been waiting for him to make a move. I also know that he's attracted to me. What should I do?
Geishawhelk Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 I wish I knew what people meant when they said "We made out".... Why don't you just roll on top of him and show him what you want? That would at least clear things up one way or the other!
Author lovelylovely1 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 "made out" means smooching, some rubbing. I thought that might be obvious....
Geishawhelk Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Not to an English person. Over here in the UK, it means getting down to business and going the whole hog... Petting is what you did. Heavy petting is anything short of penetration. Even Americans are confused by the term "Making out" because it's completely vague. It could mean anything! So just take it up a notch. As I said, if he's been vague, why don't you take the initiative?!
Treasa Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 So "heavy petting" could be used for oral sex?
MSUE Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 the days of only men initiating it are over dear...if that's what you want...to bang...I agree w geisha 110% you go ahead and initiate...and making out defition is very broad btw...
Author lovelylovely1 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 right. So no oral. It's been mostly just kissing. He's been a very good guy in every other way (outside of bed I mean). Just this has confused me a little. I'm used to men trying really hard to get into my pants the first time we're in the same bed.
Treasa Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Could it be that maybe he sees you as more than just a lay? Maybe he truly has romantic feelings and respect for you? My boyfriend wasn't ready for sex for several months, even though we were very attracted to each other. A month isn't really that long of a time. I assume he does get aroused when you're making out, right?
Author lovelylovely1 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 It could be that. He's told me he's not the type to just go around sleeping with every woman he sees, that he doesn't want to use women. I think maybe it does have something to do with respect. He's only recently started really opening up (takes him a while, shyness, etc)... so we've just started talking about that stuff a bit more.
Oliveman Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Ummm a month is in fact a long time to date someone without having sex these days. What's he waiting for, a written invitation? I think you get past the seeing her as more than a lay phase after the first couple of dates. That's just something guys that have no confidence say anyways. The girl I'm currently dating and I had sex right away, and it's not because I saw her as a one night stand at first, just that I was attracted to her and humans are sexual beings by nature. Thinking about sex as something bad is just stupid. And waiting doesn't do anything as long as the two people are mature enough to handle the feelings. I'm guessing he's gay, has ED, or a really small penis. If you're in the same bed making out things should have progressed after three times sleeping together.
chris250 Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 I think you should wait for him to make a move. I think guys like to be the initiators. I know I like to be the one initiating affection.
Geishawhelk Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 So "heavy petting" could be used for oral sex? Yes, it could. And has been.
CommitmentPhobe Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 He's only recently started really opening up (takes him a while, shyness, etc)... so we've just started talking about that stuff a bit more. Yeah he might be shy and takes him a while to feel comfortable sleeping with someone. I used to be like this in my early 20's, even AFTER I'd slept with quite a few girls. Believe me when I say It'll really mean something to him when he does sleep with you. I don't think there's anything wrong with going slowly. If you can't deal with it want then pressure him, but this is the surest way to chase him off If it's not a huge deal then have some patience
Oliveman Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 I think you should wait for him to make a move. I think guys like to be the initiators. I know I like to be the one initiating affection. Yeah maybe so but some guys are helpless and NEED the woman to make the first move. Unless it's a religious thing there's nothing wrong with her initiating
movingonandon Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 we've been seeing each other for about a month, a little over. I've stayed at his place 3 times now, each time we've shared a bed. We've made out, but there hasn't been anything more. I've been waiting for him to make a move. I also know that he's attracted to me. What should I do? Homo . He's either unaware of, or unable to do what he's supposed to do. There's nothing wrong with taking it slow, but making out and sleeping in the same bed is not taking it slowly. If you like him, I suggest you pounce on his peen before it's too late (i.e. he breaks out of his cocoon to blosom into a full-blown gay , not that there's anything wrong with it:):))
Author lovelylovely1 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 seriously people. He's not gay. He gets quite aroused during our time together, if you get my drift. So please, no more comments about him being gay, as it isn't the case.
Geishawhelk Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 I think you should wait for him to make a move. I think guys like to be the initiators. I know I like to be the one initiating affection. Chris - you're not going to have a relationship until you're 70, and you want a sadistic dominatrix to boss you around, talk to other men, but keep you in tight rein, and not permit you to talk to any other females. And you only intend having one date, per woman. What are you talking about??
Author lovelylovely1 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Posted February 6, 2009 Chris - you're not going to have a relationship until you're 70, and you want a sadistic dominatrix to boss you around, talk to other men, but keep you in tight rein, and not permit you to talk to any other females. And you only intend having one date, per woman. What are you talking about?? having lurked around these forums for a while, I realized that it was best to just skip his post.
Treasa Posted February 6, 2009 Posted February 6, 2009 Yep, just ignore the morons. And I never knew about the heavy petting = oral sex thing. I NEED to gets me to England. Sounds like a fun place!
Author lovelylovely1 Posted February 7, 2009 Author Posted February 7, 2009 I guess it just depends on which part of the body is doing the petting...
zenith Posted February 7, 2009 Posted February 7, 2009 Not to an English person. Over here in the UK, it means getting down to business and going the whole hog... Petting is what you did. Heavy petting is anything short of penetration. Even Americans are confused by the term "Making out" because it's completely vague. It could mean anything! Eff off! are you sure you're English? you're Welsh, right? But I agree... just rape him!
Ruby Slippers Posted February 7, 2009 Posted February 7, 2009 I was in a similar situation once, and I eventually asked him what was going on. He told me he'd had erectile problems in the past and was scared he would have problems again and I would dump him. I was young and naive and all "Oh, we'll just have fun working on it together!" It was a recurrent problem, and at the core of why we broke up.
Ramrod Posted February 7, 2009 Posted February 7, 2009 I'm thinking small peepee too. But you should have some idea of what's down there by now. I only ever dated Catholic girls growing up, so kissing and petting inevitably led to sex, oral at the very least (for me of course), or maybe that's because I am very passionate, am almost always aroused by close contact and a complete degenerate. If ya'll have slept together 3 times and there's been no sex, he's either got a teenie-weenie or he's flat-out gay. Not that there's anything wrong with being gay.
Author lovelylovely1 Posted February 7, 2009 Author Posted February 7, 2009 he not gay. This is fact. He also doesn't seem to have a small weenie judging by the bulge that's present when we're kissing...
Ramrod Posted February 7, 2009 Posted February 7, 2009 Are you sure it's not a sock? Men like to stuff their pants too. Oh, no...maybe it's a diaper! Seriously, he's probably a virgin and has extreme anxiety, off to blow him to get things started. Oh, and be sure to let him know it's okay if he can't "control" himself early on, it's natural. If he's a premature ejaculator, get him doing crunches, strengthening the abs is what works best, especially those that connect to the region in question, forgot their names, cuz I don't do them anymore, my lady gets of in like three minutes so...
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