Author Ormolu611 Posted March 14, 2009 Author Posted March 14, 2009 Ormolu, apparently you judge your GF for having casual sexual relationships.You further assume many things that you have no information of. You hate her daughter and you should stay away from that child before you expose her to further trauma. The last thing she needs is a step-father who hates her guts. . What???? I don't know where to begin....hate her daughter???? I had no idea that I hated her. Hmmm. Wow, I never thought of myself as a child hater.... The way you talk about her messiness and urinating problem is disgusting. You don't deserve to be around children. The girl seems to be caring and loving: she would take care of her mom - and even you - if she won the lottery. Hmmm. I don't deserve to be around children you say? So lets look into this a little closer. Recap: I meet a woman and we click on some level to the point where we are talking for over three hours on our first date and the time is flying - we really enjoy each other's company. As I get to know her, I really start to fall for her humor, her intelligence, her personality, her vivaciousness, etc. I am introduced to her daughter relatively early on. Eventually as I get to know her still better and become more familiar with what her life actually looks like behind closed doors, I am confronted by a few things. As I spend more time at her house, I am confronted by what appears to be horrible parenting standards. Her 11 year old is living in squalor (dog feces and urine stains), and unrinates in her pants on a regular basis (probably for attention), and her mother says that her daughter is simply being lazy. Her daughter is also completely lacking in self control or manners to the point where friends tell me they do not want to invite my GF anywhere when she will be bringing her daughter because she is so disruptive. I look at this child as just that - a child. A really unfortunate one and it saddens me deeply. She is only 11 years old. I honestly feel very bad for her and agree with my friends who say that this little girl is going to have a very difficult time as she gets older. To suggest that I hate this child because of her mother's severe inadequacies is nothing short of absurd - ridiculous really. So me being shocked that my girlfriend let things like this get to such a state disgusts you? I mean, you did say RP that the way I talked about her daughter urinating disgusted you - you heard contempt for the daughter in something that I said???? Moreover, I am in a situation where the person that I care for so much - my GF, is apparently a terrible mother. This is a horrible thing to admit, (it's what I am trying to deal with) and pains me greatly, but it's true. This is all relevant when she says things like she would like to have a child or children with me, don't you think? Do you think that I have a right to judge whether I want any child of mine to be treated that way . . . to be spoken to way she sometimes speaks to her daughter???? Hell no. Your GF is what she is, but at least she is honest and open with you. Your insecurities about how many men she has slept with and how special you are YOUR problem. RP, please. I have seen many of those threads on loveshack and that is not what this thread is about. It is more about my girlfriend thinking that it is okay to have multiple men coming and going casually in front of her little daughter! She had a little girl and it did not slow her down a bit. What kind of example is she setting for her daughter do you think? What's your opinion? It broke my heart when her 11 daughter suggested that she did not really expect me to stick around - she had seen a lot of guys come and go like I said. Several FWB situations and many boyfriends. My other friend thinks that partly because of all of this instability, this little girl is going to be a prime case for teenage pregnancy - that she will model her mother. He was struck and disturbed by how my GF's daughter behaved so clingly towards him without even really knowing him. My husband has had numerous women before me and it didn't make me feel less special. On the contrary: it made me feel like I am better than all of them since he chose to marry me. Congratulations . . . I couldn't be happier for you. What's your problem? Low libido? Huh? What are you talking about? Are you still talking to me? Run from that woman because you will only destroy that child's childhood with your hatred toward her. Sorry, I just don't get this......you lost me...peace out.
Author Ormolu611 Posted March 14, 2009 Author Posted March 14, 2009 You can't admit things to your therapist I think because they are so absurd. Yeah, I think your right.
burning 4 revenge Posted March 14, 2009 Posted March 14, 2009 You are still a young man, dont waste yourself in a situation like this
Girlygirl1977 Posted March 14, 2009 Posted March 14, 2009 Yeah, I think your right. If I knew you in real life - I would have told you to walk as soon as you heard that comment about the condoms! It sounds like you are wide apart on values. . . . Walk! Run! Get out!
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