Faust Posted February 5, 2009 Posted February 5, 2009 This is kind of a complex story, so I’ll start with the beginning (logical, no? ). About 6 months ago, my relationship of 5 years ended. This was partly because I fell for another girl, and we couldn’t work it out (no foul play was involved). She decided to end it, and it landed me in a state of emotional wreckage. During this time, me and the other girl fooled around a bit. We were in love, but me being in the emotional state I was (wanting my ex back, and not being able to get over her), I didn’t allow myself to really get into it. My emotional state eventually also warranted me going to a psychologist. During 2 months after the break-up with my ex, we played a sort of cat-and-mouse game, she trying to get close to me, and me not letting her. She eventually asked me if I had any feelings for her at all. Because of my emotional state at the time, and because I was honestly confused, I said ‘No’. I just couldn’t get involved at the time, and, although I did have feelings for her, I just couldn’t do it to her, to enter into something that my imbalance might later reject, and hurt her even more. About 3-4 weeks ago, we started seeing each other more often, on a friendly basis. Seeing her again caused me to realize that I do still have the same feelings for her, and that I’m still in love with her. 2 weeks ago, during a social with some friends, I told her how I felt. She said that as far as she’s concerned, the issue is closed, and that it’s never going to happen, that she still has a weakness for me but she’s over me. We talked about it, and I said I can’t accept that. We’ve talked every night over the phone after that. A week later we met up again, and went for drinks. That same night we kissed, several times. At least, I kissed her, and she kissed me back. We hugged, held hands a bit, and everything. This was last Friday. When I spoke to her on Sunday, we were going to meet again this Thursday. She canceled that on Monday however, saying that the situation between us bothered her, and that she needed some time and space. I had no choice but to agree, although I really miss talking to her. She did send me a text message the next day telling me about her evening, which I answered… Now I’m really wondering what the hell is going on. I think she still does have feelings for me, otherwise she wouldn’t have kissed me. On the other hand, she’s trying to keep the distance between us there. Is she just confused? Or is she scared I’ll just break her heart again? She knows, like I told her, that I’m finally over my ex, and ready for something new. No more games… What do you guys think?
laRubiaBonita Posted February 5, 2009 Posted February 5, 2009 once bitten, twice shy i doubt if she is looking to put herself out there and get hurt/ snubbed again. although you seem to know more what you want and need now- plus the emotional wreckage you projected seems to have eased up. if you feel strongly for her... just keep plugging along and proving to her that you are all about her now.
Author Faust Posted February 5, 2009 Author Posted February 5, 2009 I'm trying to do that, letting her know I'm all about her. I think she knows that. It's just that this "space and time" thing brings up all this stress. It takes me alot to keep myself from calling her or texting her everyday. I've decided to wait with further contact until Sunday, when a week would have passed, and see what happens then... It's just that the uncertainty of what she's thinking (especially after sending all those mixed messages) is something I'm not so good at coping with...
laRubiaBonita Posted February 5, 2009 Posted February 5, 2009 do you think she is the type to be petty and do this so you know how she felt... like revenge?
Author Faust Posted February 5, 2009 Author Posted February 5, 2009 Well, I honestly don't know. She might be, since she's a very proud person. She might well be testing me to see if I'm serious this time. On the other hand, it might be that pride that might cause her to decide not to go for it again... I'm just wondering if the signs she's sending mean that she still has feelings for me, or that I'm just over-analyzing...
Recommended Posts