mel0330 Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 hi, can some one offer a bit of help please?? my partner of 5 yrs has a habbit of walking out on us, its only ever been for a few days and hes always came back, of course during that time i cried and shouted which tbh i think he likes. 2 weeks ago he went for over a week, of course agin i cried and shouted, nasty texts etc. he came back and the sighn of a row he goes hed been back 2 weeks. i cant go on like this i cant take no more of his leaving and coming back, i feel numb crying most days. i have only been in touch to talk about kids no shouting etc. i just need a way to move forward
Truly Lost Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Do you live together? Where does he go when he leaves you for a week at a time. I had a guy do that to me (we didn't live together). It turned out he was seeing someone else. I'm sorry you are hurting, but you need to get to the bottom of why he is behaving that way. I don't know too many details of your relationship, but your in a relationship with someone who should be making you happy and supporting you. Your relationship with this guy sounds like he is constantly trying to hurt you. I couldn't deal with someone constantly messing with my heart, it hurts way too much. It sounds like you should consider breaking up with him. Then he will know what it feels like when someone walks out on him. He sounds like a real jerk.
Geishawhelk Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 No. Don't "consider breaking up with him". Tell him outright that if he does it one more time, you're not going to call him, text him, argue with him or be abusive to him. you're just going to change the locks and kick him out. Is it worth suggesting you two consider MC? Doesn't sound like it. There's poor effort on both sides to bring anything constructive to this relationship, as things appear to stand.... he gets away with it, because you let him. Until you put yout foot down, this play will out-do "The Mousetrap" and run, and run, and run......
Author mel0330 Posted February 4, 2009 Author Posted February 4, 2009 hi, yes we do live together, 2 kids i know your right, he a jerk and i should walk, just going through a lot of emotions at moment, when he leaves he goes where most men do........... mommys. im getting really fed up of him running to her every time we haave a row, its him hurting the kids i cant take no more
Geishawhelk Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 So, don't. Who's holding a gun to your head? You got yourself into this, now get out. Trust me, it really is that simple. I didn't say easy, I said simple.... But really, you need to get angry enough - if not for you, then definitely the kids - to stop living in this vicious circle. You're just being more and more of a doormat, and worse, you're teaching your kids it's ok to treat a woman like this (if they're boys), and that it's ok for a woman to be treated like this (if they're girls).
Author mel0330 Posted February 4, 2009 Author Posted February 4, 2009 all comments took on board thank you, hes been to see kids i was calm nice and polite. not sure he liked it but not my problem, im hurting and confused but these feelings will pass i know and there is a new life waiting for me. thanks all, helped more than you know
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