Mag-Lone-Freak Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Here is one of my issues... I'm quite image cautious... I've grown up with image cautious parents and people, fashion television, Barbie and other pretty dolls, modellng school...I'm told sometimes I'm attractive, and sometimes think so, but I've always had this DREAM character of myself thats better in my thoughts all the time and still do... When I'm at home, she's not really there, but when I'm out and about, I pretend like I look different in a Better way... I idealize my look and personality, pretend all my flaws aren't there, I'm all these things I struggle being out loud... It isn't until I got a laptop with a camera and started video taping myself to get my reality check finding my type cast playing it up...Do I like what I see? At first I was a little disappointed after thinking I'd look better, but now I think I'm alright, I've met the real me, and am trying to fight my idealized Fantasy self visions, by remembering the female in my pics and videos and finding what will keep my self esteem up.
Weird Posted February 4, 2009 Posted February 4, 2009 Well, good to hear you seem to be accepting what you look like. I think everyone is image conscious to a certain degree simply because society projects this crap that you need to look a certain way in order to be desired. I accept the way I look and realize that nobody chooses their face/bone structure and that looks fade with time. That and I went to the plastinated exhibit in Toronto a few years back and when you see what's under the skin it really makes you realize that one's looks are pretty trivial. I would say the whole looks stuff is mainly an issue for young adults where it is a focus (because of immaturity) and when you get into your 40s+ most people realize how silly it is to be so concerned with it and to judge others by it. Anyway, it is good to accept who you are looks wise and personality wise and anyone who judges another person based on their face (aka bone structure) is an idiot. Aside from the sex you're born with, one's face is the next main thing you have no control over unless you get surgery...so why judge someone on something they had zero input of? Better to focus time on seeing who they are than what they look like.
Nikki Sahagin Posted February 5, 2009 Posted February 5, 2009 Obviously looks do matter - we are after all visual creatures and society is based on aesthetics. It seems that the focus is put onto appearances and not much focus goes into much more beyond. Though it is easy to get caught up in this, especially when you are at more vulnerable, impressionable or lonely moments in life, and though it is natural to want to take pride in ones appearance, it is essential to focus on the PERSON. As someone once said to me, looks are nothing, connections with people are so rare, special and mean EVERYTHING. When you connect and relate to someone they become more attractive. The person I fell in love with I did not initially fancy. But as I fell in love with him, I fell in love with his appearance to. The personality, the soul, the internal self, whatever are SO much more important. How many attractive people are selfish, spiteful, bitchy people? And they then becomes LESS beautiful because of it. And then there can be someone who doesn't physically blow you away but their sweetness, or kindness, or humour, or smile, or openess is so refreshing and so appealing that automatically there eyes look a bit brighter, their smile a lot more beautiful. The inside illuminates the outside.
Recommended Posts