turnshyness Posted February 2, 2009 Posted February 2, 2009 I was seeing this girl for abt a week..roughly 4 dates. Everything was fine until the last date where she takes me to her place and things got too frisky and I crossed the line. Got kicked out of her crib. I apologized and she forgave me but because of my shame and especially when she started comparing myself to her ex bfs (all of her ex bfs were a**h**es at least that's what she says), I decided to just cut myself off from her and not to pursue it further. In a way, I just felt guilty and feel bad because she was pretty passionate towards me. She started talking abt on how I'm set if when she's going to introduce me to her parents...she also starts citing to me on how she started talking to her 'rents (she doesnt usually) on how she met a great guy. etc. and she opened up to me on how she needs to get used to me coz she's not used to dating nice guys. I admit that I crossed the line but what can I say. Lights were closed, I'm on her bed. You know what happens...haha Should I chase her back? I just dont know if I'm fighting a losing battle if I tried to get her back anyways. In a way thought I'm kinda happy it ended because things were moving too fast..she started talking abt marriage and kids etc. but there's also a side of me missing her just a little bit haha.
chrislovestosurf Posted February 2, 2009 Posted February 2, 2009 if she compared you to all her ex's more than once then maybe you should consider not looking back. Shame? Who cares she asked you to stop and you did, no biggie. Do you like her enough to want to chase her? Is she worth it?
MadDog Posted February 2, 2009 Posted February 2, 2009 She sounds like she has a lot of baggage. I don't think you really crossed the line. I mean, what did she expect would happen if you're on date #4 and she invites you to her place? You end up playing a game of scrabble while watching "Sleepless in Seattle?" Give me a break! I think if anything, her reaction to what most red-blooded American men would was abnormal--she was overreacting because of her baggage. Given her baggage and propensity to move too fast (talking about marriage anytime before the 1 year mark is totally unacceptable), I'd say it's good you got rid over her now and before you got too attached to her. MD
Author turnshyness Posted February 3, 2009 Author Posted February 3, 2009 Thanks for your replies! I'm really having a hard time coping. I still have this urges that wants me to go back and chase her. I know that it's probably a bad idea anyways...especially she has some emotional baggage. I'll probably be fighting a losing battle anyways from the start. HA. It doesnt help either that Vday is coming and yet again - I'm dateless hahaha. I really dont know what to do. I feel like just giving her a call. HELP!
39388 Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 Thanks for your replies! I'm really having a hard time coping. I still have this urges that wants me to go back and chase her. I know that it's probably a bad idea anyways...especially she has some emotional baggage. I'll probably be fighting a losing battle anyways from the start. HA. It doesnt help either that Vday is coming and yet again - I'm dateless hahaha. I really dont know what to do. I feel like just giving her a call. HELP! You could talk to her about what has happened and see if you both want to get back together. If there is open communication about things on both sides, it could be a great opportunity. If both of you don't really want it, you will have to go your separate ways. It would seem that you would only want to try the above once. If the above fails or you don't feel there is a realistic chance, keep looking for other women. You have shown that you know how to find women. I've never had a gf to lose, but I have had painful losses. The pain seems unbearable sometimes for days and I don't see any light at the end of the tunnel. Then the pain starts to ease and after a sufficient amount of time you rarely think about the loss. Vday, not surprisingly I have not enjoyed the day since I was a kid. If you are alone that day, I'd try and do something you like or keep busy. You don't want to make the mistake of dwelling all day on what you don't have. I have made that mistake almost every year and the few times I have not, much better day.
Still Trying Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 She's already making you feel guilty about something that you shouldn't feel guilty for. I agree with the others, what did she expect on date #4 with the lights off etc? You just have to decide if she's worth pursuing or not - from all that I'm gathering here, I'd walk.
NewEnglandGirl Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 I don't really see, where this is a "chase" She kicked you out of her house.
Author turnshyness Posted February 3, 2009 Author Posted February 3, 2009 lol. Well next day we talked she said she forgives and she said 50% of her wants to kick me out and just ask me to leave then there's the other 50% side of her wants me to stay. So I guess 50% I'm chasing her back? haha In either case, I think I'm going to follow other ppl's advice and just walk. I think I just regress when I find myself "dateless" so I try to find a reason to go back to her w/c is not good. Oh well. Time will heal things right? haha I don't really see, where this is a "chase" She kicked you out of her house.
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