ChrisT Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 So after being broke up for 3+ months i decided to send a quick "hey how you been" to the ex gf i cheated on(not proud). i got no response. should i have not bothered in the first place? she said if i cared about her to just stay away but she contacted me here and there asking computer questions and such...i dont know if she really needed help or..... any insight? im confused on all fronts (my own motivtions included)
lonelygurl Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 Is this a break up you intitated or did she??? Don't know if you posted the details of it somewhere else? what were your motives for sending the message to her?? more info would be helpful
Author ChrisT Posted February 1, 2009 Author Posted February 1, 2009 yep. she definitely was the one to say its over. rightly so, i ditched her one weekend for a girl that was from out of town..it gets messier...but its hard to say, im always thinking about her. just wanted to hear something i guess...
Tryng2Trust08 Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 Ok..you cheated on her, I wouldnt contact her, that scars someone, she trusted you. Im sure she is hurting also and thats may be why she has contacted you. I would just have some respect for her and leave her alone...I know easier said than done because you think of her, just do it.
awesomeallalone Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 I have to agree with everyone else... you cheated on her that must have destroyed her... i know you feel bad but think of her feelings... she needs to heal and you need to let her do that.
Author ChrisT Posted February 1, 2009 Author Posted February 1, 2009 yeah you guys are probably right. i wanted to send the message that i did and still care but i should just let it go right... i know i did the initial damage but thinking of her being with another guy drives me nuts. i need to learn to get over this selfishness. dont know where to start...anyway, thank you all.
Geishawhelk Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 You'll only start when you give someone your everything and they drop it and trample all over it. Then, you'll know.
Island Girl Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 thinking of her being with another guy drives me nuts. That is just your imagination and your not in a committed relationship. Just imagine how intensely crazy you'd be if you knew it was true and it had happened while you were 100% dedicated to her happiness. Yeah if you can really imagine it your testicles should be in your throat right now. And now you know just a bit of what you put her through. You have no right at all to contact her for anything. Especially not to alleviate your guilty conscience or confess that you made a really big mistake. Learn from your mistake and don't put someone else through that again.
Template Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 Yes. After what you did, respect her wishes and refrain from contacting her. You've gone nuts just thinking about her being with someone, and you're not even committed anymore. Just imagine how she felt when you did what you did. 10x, 100x, 1000x worse. I can just assume that when SHE contacts you, it's with a purpose (computer advice and such), and probably feels that you OWE her something. I would say that the best thing in this situation (and it's just me), that the next time she contacts you, you let her know that SHE needs to heal from this experience, and that contacting you is probably not the best things for her.
Author ChrisT Posted February 1, 2009 Author Posted February 1, 2009 the above all really difficult to hear but much appreciated. its going to be tough but i wont contact her again.
lonelygurl Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 You'll only start when you give someone your everything and they drop it and trample all over it. Then, you'll know. I like what you say there. give someone your everything and they drop it and trample all over it. That is what has happened to my heart twice now by the same man. OP....leave her alone. You broke her heart by cheating. Chances are she will never trust you again.
Recommended Posts