How many of you have seen reconciliations with exes ? or have been in one ?

[durotto]

How many of you have seen reconciliations with exes ? or have been in one ?

 

After you have been dumped .. how many of you have got back together or seen it happen ..

 

Just for statistical purposes .

[Island Girl]

what if you've always been the dumper...? Do you want stats on those reconciliations as well? I think they'd still count, yeah?

[lonelygurl]

My X and I got back together and now 3.5 years later he dumped me again.....this time he didn't even have the balls to tell me to my face. He left very early morning and left me a note and even signed it with love. WTF?????????

[amaysngrace]

I don't go backwards. Once it's over and my feelings are gone for that person that is it. I can't bring back the same feelings for someone that I once had if I have time to heal from the relationship.

 

If we are shortly broken up then that is a whole other story. Say like less than one week about. But if I don't hear from them and I move on from them then forget it. No way no how would I get back with them. Ever.

[durotto]

Sometimes reconciliations do happen .

 

Here on Loveshack we seem to preach NC and for them to be out of our lives forever .. but sometimes people do get back together .

 

I just wanted to know how many people actually have done it or seen it happen .

[Island Girl]

I have dumped them and then gotten back together.

 

Then I dumped them again.

 

Sometimes only to get back together again and break up.

 

Some of them are still tortured souls because of the yo-yo game.

 

Hence me being a proponent of the NC rule.

[lofi_tokyo]

Sometimes reconciliations do happen .

 

Here on Loveshack we seem to preach NC and for them to be out of our lives forever .. but sometimes people do get back together .

 

I just wanted to know how many people actually have done it or seen it happen .

 

You kind of said it yourself - here on LS you're getting a bit of a skewed sample of people - heartbroken ones. You're better off asking this question on a more general web forum if you want more realistic stats.

[D-Lish]

I've never gone back to anyone I have dumped. Perhaps briefly or fleetingly- but never to resume a relationship.

 

Amongst my friends- I've seen it happen twice- both those couples are still together. But the break and and resuming of the relationship happened within 2 months.

 

Now- I still sometimes hook up with someone I dated for a couple months over a year ago, but I'd never date him again.

[EmperorR]

Why risk getting burnt by the same person twice or 3 times? People do get back together but more times than not it will result in failure, with the tiny percentage it being better than before.

[peteyj]

It really depends on why you broke up. Some people split due to careers, jobs, school, and so on. If both parties are busy building their careers and it's just the wrong place and wrong time, who knows....Something might be rekindled in the future, who knows.... But if it's a bad break up where one party cheats, lies, or is just an a-hole I really don't see the point in getting back together.

 

If you want to be friends with them one day, that's one thing. But if it's a bad break up and lasts for months at a time, getting back together sounds more like one person was sorry they screwed up and the other person is depressed because they think they can't find anybody better. You can never go back to the way it was once somebody cheats, lies or does bad things. Pretending that you can is only asking to get into trouble later on.

 

If it's a bad break up then no I've never gotten back together. I'd never get back with my soon to be ex-wife. Even if she becomes a better person than she is right now, it's never going to be like it once was and at this point, she just isn't the person I'd ever want to be with. I don't see that perspective ever changing. But I will say years ago we did date and then stop dating for awhile... Like a year or so. Heck we barely remained friends cause I was busy with work and she was busy with school. Then we reconnected a year or so later and started hanging and talking and so on... But it wasn't a bad break up. When we first met it was just wrong place and wrong time and we really never were a couple. MOre like went out on some dates, were together for a bit, then decided it just wasn't the right time.

 

So if it's a situation where it's just not the right time, then maybe. But if it's a bad breakup, I don't see why anybody would want to go back down that path. There was a reason you broke up in the first place.

[loveleen]

I have 8 close friends who were dumped my their boyfriends, half who cheated, and they all crawled back crying and begging for forgivenss. All of them went strict NC. Some did it because they hated their bfs for what they did, some had no choice because they were ignored, and some were in very light contact. I don't believe anyone did the "begging&pleading" to a negative extent.

 

This makes me jealous because me and my ex were and are friends with all of them and used to double date or group date together.. But right now were mm in a "difficult situation" Because he has a new gf who he doesn't care much for and has cheated on her with me making me think he's going to leave her and come back but still won't leave her completely for me. God, I am so jealous of my friends.

 

Its just different for some unlucky people like us I guess ;(

[journey1]

I use to message here all the time. We were so in love, but i questioned it out of fear. I ended our engagement, dated another, realized he wasnt for me and ex was! Tried to get ex back. He was with someone new and he would still see me but not commit. We played this stupid game for one year. tons of heartbreak and stress. in the end i walked away because i felt he was abusing his power.

 

2 months later he came back on my 30th bday swept me off my feet, reproposed, we got married and are expecting our first baby.

 

All the pieces fit now. We have a diff relationship, its honest, its real, it feels right, its easier.

 

real love never dies, and no one else can take your place:love:

[Ramrod]

One. She broke up with me. I pulled out every stop for a second chance (no cheating involved). It ended uglier than the first time. Lot's of disparaging comments made about me. I felt worthless for months afterwards. Had I accepted defeat initially I would have been better off. Reconcilliation lasted six weeks, ended with her cheating on me and rubbing my nose in it. Let her GO!!!

[justletgo07]

I've seen it happen, and I've gotten back with an ex before. For me, it didn't go so well, but we were young and immature. It really depends on the people, the point you're at in your life, timing, and about 1000000 other variables...

 

Try not to do any probablility calculations based on responses to this thread, or on anything else. These situations are so complex, and since there is only one of you and one of your ex, there is no real way to predict what is going to happen with you, no matter what experiences everyone else has had.

[erroneouslyme]

I dated my ex for 6 months, she broke up with me via email. Our paths crossed again 3 months later. SHe said she regretted doing that to me and that she cared for me a lot, and it would never happen again.. We started dating again, it lasted 3 months, then she pulled the same thing again. Just yesterday.. I'm pretty heartbroken over it... For her its super extreme, all or nothing. THere is never any middle ground.