woe_is_me Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 my eyes r teary and my nose is all blocked up im here so that i dont reply or talk to him hes been bak in touch..in nov..and dec..and jan its f...d .. i dont know why its hurting so much tonight i still havent seen him .. but hes trying to gear me up and im nothing like i was ..im older and wiser now the tears r still coming .. i wish i never did this i wish i could have amnesia right now
NoIDidn't Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 (((Woe))) Was it something he said that makes the tears flow? Sorry you are feeling this way.
xxxheartbrokenxxx Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 Hey, Really sorry you are feeling so bad right now, it will pass. My heart goes out to you. {{{hugs}}}
whichwayisup Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 Sorry you're having a rough day..Good that you've posted here though.. Tomorrow will be a better day and you'll feel stronger and proud of yourself that you didn't reply back or answer the phone. Stay strong! You're on a good path for yourself, so what he thinks and feels does NOT matter, only thing that counts is your feelings and thoughts, so NC is the best way.
Author woe_is_me Posted February 2, 2009 Author Posted February 2, 2009 thanks guys...and NID ..no its not anyhing he said or did... well nothing that was wrong anyway ... i have told him im not supposed to talk to him unless he is separated and/or divorced ... so he knows how it is supposed to be .. i don't really know what to do or where to go from here... we sure are chalking up some history though i met him in 2002 .. i dont think it ends .. sorry if i've upset anybody .. being here has taught me a LOT .. ive been back in the last few month just reading as a guest but his attempts to contact me are becoming more frequent now .. i know that i can make demands should i wish to ..i also know ..thanks to you guys..that i cant force him to respect me but i can refuse to be disrespected .. i adore him and im very glad we live a 90 minute drive from one another because that's about all that saves us id say .. but for how long... ? is this ball really in my court?
jj33 Posted February 2, 2009 Posted February 2, 2009 Yes The ball really is in your court. And you know why? Because you are the boss of you (as children say). He is not the boss of you. he is not in control of your life. He is married to someone else. The A hurt you. It was so bad that you wish you never got involved. Right? So the mere fact that he calls and offers... ??? more of something you wish you never did. is that appealing to you? logically no. He cant force you to get involved again. You are strong enough to make good decisions for yourself and to say NO. I WONT go back there. Sorry darling if its so difficult for you to be married and you arent unhappy, but I am not Florence Nightengale to broken men in broken marriages. Its hard for you to leave? Then dont. But you cant be with me while you are married. Just keep singing your song. Or dont. Tell him not to contact you. Or better yet simply dont respond. Send him one more response saying unless I get an email with your new address and phone number showing me you have moved out and are filing for divorce, you wont be gettina ANY responses to your emails texts or other communications. You have to show him that you mean it. Otherwise yes he will believe that he can reel you in again. As Owl says there is not "try" with this one. Either you take a firm stand and stay out or you allow yourself to go back into it. There is no middle ground. Some people are OK with LC but it doesnt sound like you are. So dont let him back in. Dont let him interfere with your healing and moving forward. That power is totally in your hands.
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