shylight200 Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 I don't know if anyone read my thread about my TA and how he asked for my number, but never called or responded to my text. But here it is: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t171488/ That happened a while ago, around thanksgiving last year. Anyways, I really like this guy. He seems like the perfect guy for me, he's smart, funny, cute, etc. I ran into him on campus today and it was a bit awkward for me since he never texted me back, but he acted pretty normal. We talked for a few minutes and he wanted to know if I wanted to have dinner with him on Saturday. I told him I didn't know, that i would get back to him cause I was busy. Which is true, I am busy. I'm taking my GRE next month, so that's taking up every free minute that I have. The reason why I didn't agree to go out immediately is because he had/has my number and he never bothered to call me. I waited for his call for weeks and it sucked when he never did. Then I texted him (it took all my courage believe me...) and he never texted back. So, I don't get his deal at all. When I met him today he acted like he never asked for my number, but he didn't ask for it again so maybe he still has it...? I don't know. What do you guys think I should do?
RedRussian Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 I think he in not interested in you but ones was, then thought you not worth the trouble. Stop calling him and texting him and showing him your insecure needy self. Put on some lipstic and go get someone who apretiates you for you...an insecure and needy little girl
Author shylight200 Posted January 28, 2009 Author Posted January 28, 2009 I think he in not interested in you but ones was, then thought you not worth the trouble. Stop calling him and texting him and showing him your insecure needy self. Put on some lipstic and go get someone who apretiates you for you...an insecure and needy little girl I texted him once (and that was months ago). When he didn't reply I got over it and made absolutely no attempt to call/text him ever again. I don't think one text means I'm insecure and needy. And I didn't approach him today, he approached me, just like last time.
bean1 Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 Obviously there was at least some interest there or things wouldn't have gotten to this point, BUT I'm sure after he did that he realized how foolish he was being (maybe he talked to a friend about it?) and decided not to call. Depending on the school, TA's can be dismissed for these sorts of things, especially since many TA's are hope to become professors, that's a career killer. He started thinking with his head instead of.... Shylight, I'm not sure how much dating experience you have, but the guy KNOWS you like him. He isn't biting (the full hook). He didn't call. He didn't respond to the text. He isn't interested. This isn't uncommon. Don't put energy into someone who can't even bother to answer the phone or return a message.
Author shylight200 Posted January 28, 2009 Author Posted January 28, 2009 Obviously there was at least some interest there or things wouldn't have gotten to this point, BUT I'm sure after he did that he realized how foolish he was being (maybe he talked to a friend about it?) and decided not to call. Depending on the school, TA's can be dismissed for these sorts of things, especially since many TA's are hope to become professors, that's a career killer. He started thinking with his head instead of.... Shylight, I'm not sure how much dating experience you have, but the guy KNOWS you like him. He isn't biting (the full hook). He didn't call. He didn't respond to the text. He isn't interested. This isn't uncommon. Don't put energy into someone who can't even bother to answer the phone or return a message. I understand that. And I got over it and moved on. But then he asks me out after months? I'm beginning to think this is like a game to him almost. Ask her out, ignore her, ask her out again...?
kashmir Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 I understand that. And I got over it and moved on. But then he asks me out after months? I'm beginning to think this is like a game to him almost. Ask her out, ignore her, ask her out again...? No, guys don't play games to that extent. I see three possibilities. The likeliest is that he likes you but not enough to put you first. He may have originally gotten your number, considered a possibility of dating you, and then went onto other things - meaning dating you wasn't that important to him. After seeing you again, his interest levels raised a bit. Maybe he realized he missed out before, or maybe he'll do the same thing. Another possibility is that something having to do with him being a TA conflicts. Either the work or the cautions of dating a former student. This could be mixed in with the possibility above. A third possibility is that he's like me - weird. He'll convince himself early on that you're not interested and move on before asking you out a second time. I can think of several girls I did this with. Probably not likely though.
RedRussian Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 Chances are, this guy is dating someone else and sometimes has free time to drift to other impulses. No offense to you, surely every girl likes to think she is special and one and only, but it has nothing to do with your looks. Juggling several women at once may be very difficult at times, trust me I know. Nevertheless, men sometimes go through emotional times during their relationships, and reserve to an occasional affair. You will always be on his mind, but not on your time.
Isolde Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 It's a complex situation because he was your TA and the text thing happened a year ago anyway. Did he ask whether you still had his number (do you still have it)? Did he say he would call you? Guys don't usually ask girls out on dates just to torture them I'd say if you're capable of being noncommittal about this, you can just go on the date and enjoy yourself w/ no expectations, BUT if you have a serious crush on him, you might not feel it's worth it. If you do nothing, you can probably win either way. If he contacts you ultimately, you'll know he's probably interested. If he doesn't, no loss.
zenith Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 No, guys don't play games to that extent. I see three possibilities. The likeliest is that he likes you but not enough to put you first. He may have originally gotten your number, considered a possibility of dating you, and then went onto other things - meaning dating you wasn't that important to him. After seeing you again, his interest levels raised a bit. Maybe he realized he missed out before, or maybe he'll do the same thing. Another possibility is that something having to do with him being a TA conflicts. Either the work or the cautions of dating a former student. This could be mixed in with the possibility above. A third possibility is that he's like me - weird. He'll convince himself early on that you're not interested and move on before asking you out a second time. I can think of several girls I did this with. Probably not likely though. I agree with this post
IrishCarBomb Posted January 28, 2009 Posted January 28, 2009 What do you guys think I should do? Enjoy your dinner. If you get a good vibe, run with it. If you don't, then just leave it at one date.
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