XxConfusedxX Posted January 27, 2009 Posted January 27, 2009 Alright, i just have a couple questions but i think it would be easiest if i just go through whats going on. 1st just a lil background I'm 18, I'm on the shyer side and i have no real experience with dating, barely even talked to girls before i started working with this lil group I've become great friends with. But anyways I've worked with this group for a lil under two years. We've all jumped ship from job to job and we all seem to know each others life story. So in our group there's about 5 other girls, 3 of which are all within 2 yrs of me and the other two are later 20s. and one other guy(the other guy is new but he's melded in nicely, lol). So up until a month ago I've been the only guy at work so i always got a ton of crap(just fun and games though) Alright, now the fun part. So i was working with this group for maybe 6 months or so when a new beautiful blond girl started and I've been crushing on her since. The only problem is she's had a boyfriend so just between being me semi-shy self and being respectful of her relationship I've taken a step or two back. Then as time went on we've begun to talk and have become pretty good friends, I've become her official male friend she comes to for advice and well i love it. She's tried hooking me up with a couple of her friends but I've never pounced because, well, i want her not her friends. so as time goes by it becomes not so much of a secret that i have a crush on her(pretty much every person i work with knows(possibly even her)). I still hear all her stories, and she's completely stopped bringing up her friends names, except the occasional she broke up with him thing. Now following all this, she's started telling me about relationship problems between her and the BF. Just him not being outgoing enough, extremely shy, isn't going to go to college, and just a boat load of things. So I've continued to be patient, hoping for the potential breakup and then over this past weekend she told me she has another job lined up and she's going to be leaving the place we work in June to work at a local hospital(to be a bailer or something like that) But anyways she's all i can ever think about and i am just lost. Every person i talk to about it never gives me any info or advice, just a how cute or whatever but do any of you think she may be interested? or should i just see if any of her friends are stil available and just give up on her? to be honest i just don't know anymore
Still Trying Posted January 29, 2009 Posted January 29, 2009 you've been friend zoned. Pursue it lightly and be prepared for rejection. When girls start telling you their intimate details they're likely viewing you as a brother/girlfriend type of thing instead of what you're hoping for. go after one of her friends.
voldigicam Posted February 1, 2009 Posted February 1, 2009 The new job is a good thing. Get over your crush. Stay a fringe friend. If an opening occurs, quietly step into it. And do look at others. They'll always be options. No choice is perfect. Doesn't mean there won't be regrets about the ones where things didn't work out. I'd need to have clones all over to have followed up on all opportunities!
Author XxConfusedxX Posted February 2, 2009 Author Posted February 2, 2009 1st of all thanks for the responses, havent had much time to jump on her since i posted this thread. but anyways, just have some more questions regarding your responses when you say "Stay a fringe friend. If an opening occurs, quietly step into it. And do look at others." tbh im not sure what you mean "a fringe friend" do you just mean stay friends but not a major part of her group? or... tbh i dunno watcha mean, im sorry Then when Still Trying said just go for one of her friends, would that also kill any chances of me getting with the girl i like, for example(if girl A is the one i like and B is her friend) do you think girl A would totally change her view on me, as in just being a jerk or anything, if anything happened(like a break up) between me and B. but i guess that would just depend on her but thanks for the help
Still Trying Posted February 3, 2009 Posted February 3, 2009 Then when Still Trying said just go for one of her friends, would that also kill any chances of me getting with the girl i like, for example(if girl A is the one i like and B is her friend) do you think girl A would totally change her view on me, as in just being a jerk or anything, if anything happened(like a break up) between me and B. but i guess that would just depend on her but thanks for the help it will kill your chances with girl A, my advice comes from the fact that it doesn't sound like you had/have much of a chance with girl A to begin with. Better to get set up with one of her friends than nothing at all right? From all that you're saying it sounds like you waited too long or it wasn't meant to be in the first place.
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