Very very hurt and heartbroken

[HEARTBROKENHURT]

Well i met this girl about 3 yrs ago and we started having an excellent relationship but there were times it was sour as hell. I did alot of bad things that i am not proud of but she did her part as well too.

 

She had never dated anyone or even had sex with anyone yes she was still a virgin when i met her and she was 23 at the time. Well we had our problems over the years and i know i wasn't the best guy but she knew i was the sweetest guy u would ever meet as long as i wasn't drinking.

 

Well within the first 6 months she had fallen in love with me but i wasn't ready to have that relationship b/c it was hard for me after other things i had been through. Well i took her virginity which before i did i told her i didn't want to i wanted to make sure it was right for the both of us and she insisted that it was that i was the 1 that she wanted to be with.

 

Well we became very close and she moved an hr and a half away from me which we dealt with b/c she would come and see me all the time. Well it started out as coming to see me every weekend then every other weekend and then maybe 1 weekend a month and then it began that she wanted to spend time with friends. This was just in the last year.

 

Well her aunt died and we went up there to the funeral and spent time together. She was very close to her aunt and her whole family is very close and they are all so emotional. I hung in there with her and her family through this very terrible time. Everytime she would go to see her parents in her home state she would have an attitude with me on the way there and on the way back. Well i just stopped goin with her up there and she still acted the same way.

 

Well to get on with the situation i introduced her to some friends of mine that she could hang out with and she started hanging out with this girl that i thought was a good person but she's really not she has such an evil side that i never knew about until they started hanging out. Well i believe she influenced her to leave me and start talking to this other guy that her cousin introduced her to. Note: the guy is married and has a kid.

 

Well things started getting really really rocky with us and she would do suspicious things and i would bring them up to her and it would just start big fights between us. Well all of a sudden she gets this wild hair that she doesn't wanna see me anymore and that i have turned her off to havin a relationship with anyone all together. Well the guy her cousin introduced her to they had been talking on the phone and he had been coming over with his daughter (yes the married guy) well we could be laying in bed at night and he would call to wanna talk about his problems with his wife with her and i would be like ok that's cool, have a friend he needs 1 so be nice to him and understand him.

 

Well i just started having suspicions that him and her were being more than friends but she swore on her life that nothing like that was goin on. Well she came and stayed the night with me in oct. Then she had to all of a sudden leave the next morning she wasn't feeling well. Ok i understood that but before she left she was like i think it's best that we just be friends and move on with our lives and i was just shocked!

 

Well it upset me so bad i mean really really bad and well she called me on her way home and was like i'm sorry i love u and care about u but i fell out of love with u. I asked her if it was b/c she was wanting someone else and she swore it wasn't. Well the last time we imed(instant message) was right before halloween and i told her she would miss me and want me back 1 day and she said yes that is true but not right now. Well we didn't have any contact whatsoever since that im until jan of this year.

 

Well she finally told me a week ago that her and the other guy had been "seeing one another" since nov. But nothing really serious. I mean i love the girl to death and it's killing me that she really won't even talk to me anymore and that it seems like i was no one in her life. I mean she even said she will never ever in her life regret that i took her virginity that i was the person she wanted to but it's like that means nothing to her.

 

I am a guy and that means alot to me! I took her purity and she acts as if it was nothing to her that it's just time we move on. This is very hard for me b/c i love her to death and i never want anything bad to happen to her and i always want her happy. She says he makes her happier than i did and that our connection wasn't anywhere as strong as hers and his is. She asked me if i have been having sex or seeing someone else and i told her hell no she was the last person since oct. Well i asked if they had been having sex knowing they haven't b/c that is something she doesn't just do. She swears up and down they haven't at all and that they are taking their "relationship" 1 day at a time.

 

I mean this guy is younger than her, already been married, and has a kid for christs sake! It really kills me that we aren't anywhere close to what we used to be and that it's like i was a mistake in her life and that it's so easy for her to move on with someone else. She swears they never had anything goin on until nov. And i have to believe her.

 

Well come to find out new years weekend she deleted me off of her myspace page for no reason and i asked her about that and she said it was b/c i was keeping tabs on her and we haven't even spokin to each other since oct! Does anyone have any advice on how i can get her back in my life? I mean i stopped drinking and i am trying to stop smoking as well but it hurts me so bad b/c it's like she said i needed to do those things for myself and not her, but she bitched about me drinking all the time and said that if i could clear that up then maybe things would change. I was doin those things for the both of us.

 

She says there may be a 2nd chance in the future but things happen for a reason and she's happy now. To this day i still don't im her or anything she will im me but we haven't spoken on the phone since oct. Her song on her myspace profile is rhianna "rehab" i mean it's like she's giving me false hope or she's just toying with me to see how angry i will get. I've tried to let her go and get out of her life but there's not a millisecond that goes by that she isn't on my mind. I can't sleep i can barely eat it's just tearing me apart. What can i do to over come this heartache?

 

I'm a damn great guy 1 of the sweetest guys any lady will ever meet in their life but damn i do have feelings too ya know? I mean all i wanna do is cry is that bad??? I am so heartbroken over this and she just keeps telling me that i am still in the "healing process" and i will meet someone else soon and that she's not the only girl out there. I know these things already but i just can't see how she can be happier with him and how things are goin in her life it's like i am non-existant to her now.

 

 

She says they aren't dating but just "seeing each other" and they are not "hooking up" just hanging out as friends. If me and her were best friends and lovers then how can she just throw me out of her life like this?? This is total devastation and heartbreak for me, how can i get over this??? I've been out with friends and put up a "front" that i am having an excellent time but behind closed doors i am crying and dying inside and it's killing me. Does anyone think she will come back i mean she says maybe in the future but who knows? I could go on and on but i am gonna end this any ?s or suggestions please feel free to comment. Thanks

[hunkahunkaburninlove]

She is a cheating liar. Why do you want her back? As she said there may be a chance for you in the future. That's if it doesn't work out with this guy or anyone else before her clock ticks to many times. Yes you could have a chance if no one better comes along. Is that OK with you?

[HEARTBROKENHURT]

I was thinking the same damn thing! I fell in love with her but it's way to late she said. She said she gave me over 2 and a half yrs of her life now it's time for someone else. I am thinking ur so full of sh-it u've been hiding this from me but swears up and down she hasn't!