muggwuffin Posted January 21, 2009 Posted January 21, 2009 this will be a long post but i need too get the whole story out in the hope for accurate responces on what too do, if anyone can help i really would appreciate it. Ok i say online girl because technicaly we havent met yet! however we met last febuary online and have spoke pretty much daily on the phone(for upto 6 hours at a time) , webcam and in mails since the day we met, the attraction is strong and mutual and we click very well. So why havent we met? well heres the stupid part..shes in a relationship! *slaps myself* i know i know, i must be mad..however when we met she was single and 2 months into knowing eachother she got back with her first and only patner whom she has been with 6 years, by that time i had feelings for her and thought id try and ride things out, hes a total ass towards her..we had planned too meet this year when she comes home too england. so fast forward till monday...i noticed she had seemed abit distant so i try and find out if everything ok..this got on her nervs this time..and i say this time-because i can get worried and when i do i tend too try and find out why, i shouldent push but then i shouldent have too sit her wondering neither. she got quite irrate about it saying "you never stop do you" im not THAT bad...but i made a point of saying il try and change and i intend too. we carried on speaking for abit and she said "mabey its just the day , or how things have been recently, but im just not that interested atm-im not being nasty, just honest" well that was a smack too the face!..we exchange a couple more mails and she says"mabey we should speak in a few days" her mail after that just said "im sorry i have too go, goodnight xxx" i might get insecure from time too time but im not clingy too the point of not giving space-so i immidatly agree that if thats what she wants i understand, told her id miss her and for her too contact me when she felt the time was right. this is so odd for us, we have spoken daily for almost a year and its not just the odd mail, its littiraly hundreds a week and mabey speak on the phone for 6/8 hours a week on average-during the time we have known eachother we have been EXTREAMLY close, and back on thursday we was all lovey dovey as normal. heres what i need too know, was i too hasty on immidatly agreeing too her few days appart ?(and theres nothing wrong with time appart it just seems like bad timing too have it) , was it wrong of me too put the ball in her court and let her contact me when she feels like it? she has in the past taken things the wrong way and she may see this as i dont care, if she dosent make contact when would be a reasnable time too say hello without seeming totaly clingy..and should i keep it light or explain why i decided too break the scilence? im just really confused, i love and miss this girl, nothing wrong with time appart but im acctualy questioning if she will get in contact again since we left things on such a low note, i dont know if i did the right thing and i dont know how long too not make an effort too talk too her. such a long post and if youve made it this far thank you so much, any advice will be really appreciated.
I'm Joe Posted January 22, 2009 Posted January 22, 2009 This is the opinion of someone who has very little expirience with love, let alone online love, but here is what I think you should do. You need to sit down and hammer out exactly what you expect from the future of this relationship, and nail down exactly how you feel about her, then compose a well thought out letter detailing your hearts condition. you need to give her an ultimatum. becuase the longer this drags out the more mad at yourself you'll be when its finally over.(assuming it does end that way). Just make sure the letter is articulate, compasionate, and from the heart, and since your English you shouldnt have a problem with any of those things, Or Tolkien hasnt taught me well about the English.
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