Paralyzed Posted January 21, 2009 Posted January 21, 2009 Been with her for a 1 1/2 years. She has broken up with me at least 12 times. I leave her alone and she comes crawling back, calling, texting, emailing, until I agree to see her. We end up back together everytime. Then when we are back together she gives me a hard time about how often I went out with friends, want's to know how many girls I met etc. Then we fight and the cycle starts again. I know this is not healthy for me, or for her. But, I do love her very much. I know a lot of people here will tell me i'm an idiot, I realize how bad it looks. But, how do I get over someone I love, whether i should love her or not, I do. She also pressures me for major commitments when we get back together. Moving in together, booking trips months ahead. How can I do these things when it's so unstable. Then, she gets angry because I wont commit. Give me some advice please. No, we aren't teenagers. We are both adults in our early thirties.
Lady Sinistar Posted January 21, 2009 Posted January 21, 2009 Been with her for a 1 1/2 years. She has broken up with me at least 12 times. I leave her alone and she comes crawling back, calling, texting, emailing, until I agree to see her. We end up back together everytime. Then when we are back together she gives me a hard time about how often I went out with friends, want's to know how many girls I met etc. Then we fight and the cycle starts again. I know this is not healthy for me, or for her. But, I do love her very much. I know a lot of people here will tell me i'm an idiot, I realize how bad it looks. But, how do I get over someone I love, whether i should love her or not, I do. She also pressures me for major commitments when we get back together. Moving in together, booking trips months ahead. How can I do these things when it's so unstable. Then, she gets angry because I wont commit. Give me some advice please. No, we aren't teenagers. We are both adults in our early thirties. Simple. She's like me. We want something we can't have. except my ex proposed to me and took it back the day of our 1 year anniversary. She feels insecure because she cares a lot about you. At least you still love her. Mine doesn't. Anyways, I think if she really respected you she would understand your needs and just keep on going about with what the two of you have. She should be thankful that you haven't cast her to the curb. I don't understand why she's pressuring you so much. Me, I could wait as long as was needed for the sake of the relationships sanity. Maybe you should try to reaffirm her that you are there for her for the long haul, bot for the "right now." Buy her flowers, do nice things for her to "show" her your affections. It might work.
Template Posted January 21, 2009 Posted January 21, 2009 Clearly you and your girl have a lot of issues that needs to be worked out. Relationships takes some work, and involves a lot of give and take. I have a feeling you guys really need to sit down and talk about you both of you want in a relationship. I may love her for various reasons, and she the same of you, but if it's not for reasons to have a relationship, then you shouldn't be in one. Simple as that. I mean dang dude. Sounds like she wants a commitment, and it sounds like you don't (from what I read), I think this is an integral part of a relationship you should both agree on; don't you?
Zammo25 Posted January 21, 2009 Posted January 21, 2009 Been with her for a 1 1/2 years. She has broken up with me at least 12 times. I leave her alone and she comes crawling back, calling, texting, emailing, until I agree to see her. We end up back together everytime. Then when we are back together she gives me a hard time about how often I went out with friends, want's to know how many girls I met etc. Then we fight and the cycle starts again. I know this is not healthy for me, or for her. But, I do love her very much. I know a lot of people here will tell me i'm an idiot, I realize how bad it looks. But, how do I get over someone I love, whether i should love her or not, I do. She also pressures me for major commitments when we get back together. Moving in together, booking trips months ahead. How can I do these things when it's so unstable. Then, she gets angry because I wont commit. Give me some advice please. No, we aren't teenagers. We are both adults in our early thirties. Get rid and FAST. My ex did the same to me over 3 and a half years. She dmupned me 6 times and then wondered why I was not sure of commitment and to get a place togerth, married etc. I think she did it to spring me to action but now I can see everythime she did it , it put more doubt in my ,ind if she loved me at all. If I had done that whats to say she would have called off the marriage or told me to leave our place if I did anything trivial to annoy her. Thats no basis for a long term committed relationship is it. You have been dumped 12 times but still go running back like a lovesick Puppy like I did. Listen YOU DO NOT WANT TO EVER SEE HER AGAIN, YOU DO NOT TO EVER MEET HER AGAIN, YOU DO NOT WANT TO EVER SPEAK TO HER AGAIN. Be strong. Why take someone back again who dumped you 12 times. If she loved you truely she would not let you walk aay from your life like if my ex had truely loved me she would not have dumped me 6 times. You don't need it, I don't need it. Life is yough enough as it is without the loove we love pulling the rug away from us every time things get a little tough.
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